Assalamu woalaikum.

This is very personal and confidential. I never shared it anybody. So, please...

I am a service holder wife doing job before marriage. My fathers income was not sufficient for my family so that I have been giving money to him. After marriage my husband asked about my salary but I told him lie because I could feel he don't allow to provide money for my fathers family and without knowing him still I am giving money to my family. My salary was triple of my husband salary and total family expenses was maintained both of us. Now I have a 2 years old baby and unfortunately last 1 years my husband is job less. So, total family cost and my child cost is bearing me. And also I give money as my Jakat, help of poor people, construction of mosque and some savings which about my husband don't know anything due to not shared actual my salary. I know about the rules of Islam that no woman can give a single of coin without his husband permission. For that I feel very culprit of myself. Now my questions is-

1. May I continue to give financial support to my fathers family? (It is very difficult for me to look my family needy whether I have enough money in my hand)
2. When I can feel that my husband will not allow big amount of money give to poor people/mosque (where I have many poor relatives and neighbor who are really needy)
3. For all that reason when I tell lie, is the God mercy me?

Please give me the right solutions..
I am waiting for your reply.

I fail to see the point of marriage if it is based on lies, deception, and mistrust.

I understand in the situation you are in. I think, you should first take care of your immediate family members with the salary you have, i.e. you own husband, children and father. Then what with a small portion you can give it out to the poor. What you can do is from your salary amount you can divide among your needs, more thence half let's say 70% you can keep for your own family (or more according to your needs), then 20% for you father and 10% maybe for other stuffs you do. Just a suggestion :)

Is not the money you give to parents, money to the poor.

But I see future marriage problems when the husband finds out, and at some point hewill

Hello Sharmin,

Please open the link below and you will find your answer, but I agree with Fr-Chuck that it may be a problem if your husband finds out and he doesn't like what are doing be best to share your thoughts with him, good luck.

Can a woman donate any of her money without her husband’s permission? - islamqa.info (http://islamqa.info/en/48952)

Part of your religion (which I don't agree with) is that you obey your husband. You yourself stated that every coin you give has to be approved by your husband. You're lying to him about how much money you make, and where that money is going.

No matter what religion you are, lying to your spouse is not okay.

Maybe it's time for your father to get a job and support his own family, and for you to be honest with your husband, the father of your child!