Okay, so this girl was my best friend. I started developing feelings for her last year, we ended up getting really messed up on new years and confessing our love for each other. We started dating when we got back from winter break. We soon ended things because of our personal lives. We tried being friends for a while after but then things got a little out of control I was hurt and confused, so I pulled away from her completely. Ignoreing her avoiding her just being a completely horrible person all because I still have feelings for her. On the last day of my senior year I went to her and appologized for everything I had done trying to fix things because I needed my best friend back. But since then my feeling have come back stronger then ever. It tears me apart because I know I hurt her. I honestly think I am in love with this girl though. I cant get her out of my head. I've tried dating other people I've tried getting messed up every night I have also done other things in order to try and get her off my mind and it just doesn't work. I told her a while back that I still had feelings but I was getting past them(lie). Last night she came over to my house to hang out with me and my friends. We were sitting on the couch being how we normally are and she ended up laying her head on my lap. Then she told my cousin to play a cd that she had made for me we sat there and listened to the music and made small talk but ended up getting really emotional at some of the songs and holding hands. When she left I balled my eyes out because I miss her. What should I do? I need something to either get my mind off her or some advice on how to go about these situations because I cant keep ripping myself apart.

If you think you're in love, I doubt you are. You just miss your friend. Stay away for a time to get your balance back. Getting messed up and confessing things often lead to trouble. The fact that you didn't stay together says a lot.

Take a good break from her and stop trying to force being friends and around her so much. Hard to get your feelings under control when the cause of those feelings is around so much, and you keep doing those intimate things together, like holding hands and getting emotional about music, and letting her put her head in your lap.

You are just too emotional for all that and alcohol makes it worse. How old are you both? You really do need something else to do and different people to do it with for a while.