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View Full Version : Weird feeling since I had a miscarriage?


tcart042
Sep 27, 2014, 03:52 PM
Well my boyfriend just had a baby(the girl was pregnant before we got together) and ever since I had my miscarriage over the summer and since the baby was born... I have really had this feeling that I want a child. I'm only 19 and I know not prepared for it. I am in my second year of college,but I just don't know what to do with this feeling. I get emotional when I see babies and baby things. I don't know what to do. Is this just a phase?

joypulv
Sep 27, 2014, 03:58 PM
Not a phase - a normal reaction to events. If it starts to interfere with your ability to get through school and each day, then see a therapist for a few visits. It is understandable to struggle with the knowledge that your boyfriend's ex had a baby (and he's the father) and you lost one. I hope you are able to come to terms with it in the next months and are able to wait before you try again. You don't want a 'make up' baby or a 'revenge' baby.

Alty
Sep 27, 2014, 04:10 PM
Your post says it all. You know you're not ready for a baby.

Most girls long for a child from a very young age. Doesn't mean they're ready to be a mom. This is normal, but having a baby just because you feel the need for one, when you know you're not ready for one, that would be a cause for concern.

I would look deeper into why you're yearning for a child right now. Your boyfriend just had a child with another woman. That means that no matter what, he's going to have to have contact with this woman that he obviously had enough feeling for that he had sex with her.

Could it be that you want a child simply so you can have something to hold him to you, like the ex has?