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View Full Version : I am paying child support DIRECTLY to my daughters stepmom


saracebollero
Sep 23, 2014, 06:20 PM
To make a long story short, my daughter was living with me on and off for 6 years while I served in The Army. Her grandmother was helping me take care of her while I paid support. Her son was off getting high and getting in trouble with the law and never visited or paid a dime. (Was arreste 72 times) When he finally got himself half way sober in about 2006, his mother took me to court to get custody switched from me and her to her and her son. The Judge granted it (same judge that put him in jail for putting a gun to my head and beating me) and said I abandoned by daughter by going into the military. SO, at this time she was still living with her grandmother and I was still paying support. Her father had a new girlfriend and she filed for TANF and started receiving over $400 a month for her. She lied and said she was living in the home. The state then put child support on me in the girlfriends name. After finding this out, I called Richmond and had an investigation done. She was convicted of welfare fraud, she pleaded guilty to drop the Felony to a misdemeanor. The child support order was never dropped and I am still expected to pay support to her. Her father has 6 years worth of support that was never paid and yet they will not consider it. The state of VA says that the only way the order can be dropped is for her to write a letter stating to wants to drop the order. ( not going to happen) I send my daughter money whenever she needs it and I also regained custody FINALLY in 2012. Should I be paying support to this lady in her name after the welfare conviction?? Please help! Ive been trying to deal with this for years.

Fr_Chuck
Sep 23, 2014, 08:03 PM
You should be paying, if there is a court order,
That is the legal issue.

If you need to get it stopped, you file a motion in court and fight it.
*** not have them write a letter, that is silly.

You do it, in court.

cdad
Sep 24, 2014, 04:13 AM
Call the DA out there and find out which agency is handling it. Then file through them. Also find out what you can about her conviction. It should be public record. By continuing to receive the support she is commiting fraud.

ScottGem
Sep 24, 2014, 04:48 AM
I'm a little confused by who you are referring to. Who was convicted of fraud, the grandmother or the girlfriend? If you regained custody, why was support not stopped at the same time that custody was restored?

Do you have an attorney?

AK lawyer
Sep 24, 2014, 06:14 AM
Thank you for your service.

As I understand the situation, the girlfriend of your child's father was convicted of welfare fraud regarding your child, but there is still a support order (requiring you to pay her child support). Go to the court that issued the support order, prove the girlfriend's conviction and the reason for it, and get the support order modified retroactively.

After reviewing your initial post, I see that you wrote " The state then put child support on me in the girlfriends name.". By "The state", do you mean the state child support agency, rather than the court? In that case, you ask the court to correct the administrative order.

saracebollero
Sep 24, 2014, 07:05 AM
Thank you for your response. Yes, the state put the child support on me Bc of the TANF, it was never court ordered. I was expected to pay the TANF back but since I was able to show that I was paying support to his mom as well as the fact my daughter was not living with her father and his now wife at the time, I did not have to pay it back, they did. There was no court order. The state keeps telling me it is legal and that I am required to pay child support to the step mom. The girlfriend, now wife's conviction is public record. I have no issues paying support but I would like a court order in her fathers name. The child support agency says this is not possible unless the step mom voluntarily drops the support.

My daughters father and I both have custodial rights. I can take her anytime and she can live with me at any time. My daughter has chosen not to live with me Bc my rules are stricter then her fathers. The girlfriend, now wife was convicted, pled guilty, to welfare fraud. I do not have an attorney Bc I can not afford one. I have spoken with a few but their fees are very high. I have requested a review of my case over a dozen times without any change.

ScottGem
Sep 24, 2014, 07:09 AM
Have you talked to the judicial branch of your service? They can sometimes provide legal help.

And your situation seems really complicated. Bottom line is support should be paid to the primary custodial parent. If the father married the girlfriend and the child lives with them, then you pay support to the father.