This spring I met a boy who is soon going to be 18 in a few weeks, I'm going to be 14 next month. We both were in our high school's sports camp. He began helping me with techniques for soccer and soon we became close friends. After a while of being close friends he started talking about how pretty I was and how I was really cool, he made me feel like somebody. I started to become attracted to him and we soon hardly left each others side. We would call each other everyday and he would take me to his house after practice. It was great to have someone like him to be my boyfriend. I didn't even realize he was making sexual advances towards me and when he finally took away my virginity last night I just laid there shocked and cried. He didn't stop even when I was in pain, not even when I told him to or when I started crying and bleeding. Instead he slapped me when I tried to push him off me. Afterwards he put me in the bathtub and cleaned me up, then took me home before my mother got off from work. While he was talking to me in his car, I refused to look at him when he asked me to and took his hand and forcefully turned my head around. He apologized for hitting me and being rough. I felt dirty and stupid for letting this happen to myself. I hate him for hurting me, but at the same time I love him because he's the only one who cares about me. I'm really confused about what I should do. Without him I feel depressed, but now I don't think I will feel safe being around him.

Have you ever heard the expression, "no means no?" When his sexual advances were not welcomed by you, and he forced himself on you, and raped you, which is what you have described, and that is unlawful, and must be reported.

Many children (and women) have found themselves thinking that finally somebody is showing affection, and friendship, and are completely taken with the attention, and what it really is, with men like the one that raped you, is a man who is grooming you- to rape. An 18 year old man has no business with a 14 year old child, and the law backs that up, because you do not have the emotional maturity, or capacity, to consent to sex with an adult.

As an adult, he knows he cannot do what he did without severe consequences, but it has to start with you.

He should be reported- there is no way around this. And you will need counseling to see that no friendship existed, or will exist. You were a mark, and he fed you all you needed so he could get you in the position of being raped. Please realize that, and see that at some point, had you talked to your mother truthfully about this man, she would have likely told you it is not appropriate, and stay away from him. If you were my daughter, I would have reported him to the camp supervisors- and he should now be reported- because other 14 year olds will be around for him to set up and rape.

Please confide in your mother and father, and get this out in the open, and dealt with. To bury this and pretend it didn't happen, or he didn't really mean to hurt you, or just couldn't help himself- is foolish and dead wrong. He knew exactly what he was doing. Now you must step up, and let the police deal with him. My guess is he has a history.

Counselling will help you recover, and time will teach you what you didn't know about men, when you were 14. You will realize that you fell into a trap, and it is not one you will likely ever let yourself fall in to again I'm sure.

Please, tell your mother- now.

What this guy did was rape you and you need to tell your mother. This guy needs to be reported. You could very well not be the only young girl he has done this to. This is not affection, it is manipulation and rape.