To why I don't tell my parents is because why hurt them? I'm not doing this to rebel, I'm doing this because we want to take the next step of our lives
I guess thanks but not.
the question wasn't about your opinion, so there was no reason to "disagree". What was my fault is that i left out some things.
What would have been the right answer would have been "No" or "Doubtfully"
I guess it was dumb of me using a site I never herd of. Should have went to ask.com

They won't be sent anything but it will be public record. You could be sent junk mail per your married name if anyone has their address for you. Are you moving when you get married? If they Google you, it could come up that you are married to this guy.

What state or country are you in, fancy ? Let's start at the basics,

Gee... you both must make your parents proud to be sneaking around like this.

And sorry... site rules.. anyone can answer about anything...

You really can't keep it secret... because as was stated its all public record. Stuff WILL end up being mailed to your adresses of record...assuming you are both still living at home mooching off your parents, it will be their adress.

Seems odd that it would be so important for you to get married yet you need to keep it a secret from your parents. My guess is that you are both pretty young, living at home, and are going to get married because you love each other so much!...yet you probably will still be returning to your parents homes every day.

How far off am I?

Quoting this since you went back and editied your original post 3.5 hours after you posted it..


Marriage
Me and my boy friend wish to get married but without our parents knowing. Yes it is legal in our state but we don't wish our parents to know. Please help. Will my parents be notified or able to find out?
****please no comments about me telling my parents, you don't know my situation.

Sorry I was unsure about what category to post this in.

**added**
seems like got some rude answers. no we dont live with our parents. we have been living together for the last 4 years.

his parents know and mine don't. reason is because my parents are "old fashion" and my dad has told me and my brothers "if one of you end up being gay, im disowning you."
so seriously, im just looking for answers, not your opinion. this site wasnt made so people like you can hide behind a screen and troll. this isnt difficult and should be only a couple sentances long. basically a yes no answer...

Last edited by fancyprune; Today at 11:01 PM. Reason: rude answers



I agree with odinn7, I see a LOT of immaturity in what you are writing, and how you write it. Despite claims to the contrary AFTER the original post.

So you're living together for 4 years and you're still worried about your parents...and my answer was rude because it wasn't what you wanted to hear. So sorry.

It is weird that you have been on your own for 4 years and you still worry what your parents think...what control they must have. So are you gay and you are worried about them finding that out...is that what this is all about?

Stop worrying so much! But anyway, if you really are living together for 4 years now, in a different state, you have very little to worry about. Chances of them finding out you are married are very slim. Do what you got to do and don't look back.

Oh, and...nobody here is trolling. Too bad someone can't disagree with you without being a troll.

Hum, this site is for people to give anonymous (kind of like hiding behind a screen) advice in an open forum. Most of the advice relative to relationships is a bunch of opinions from strangers. That is what you get here. When facts are in question, most of us try our best to be accurate, but there is no proven, factual answer to your dilemma. We can tell you that if you aren't ready to stand up to your parents and own your relationship publicly, you are not ready for marriage. They might disown you / you have to choose. It sucks, but marriage is about choosing your spouse above all others when a choice must be made. If they say they don't recognize your marriage, tell your parents you don't recognize their view on this issue.

And I see the main question has been edited yet again. More proof as to why we shouldn't allow the original question to be edited.

I also have to add that none of us here are mind readers...IF you had taken the time to tell us in the original posting of your question that you were a gay couple, that would have made more sense and I wouldn't have answered as I did the first time. Instead, you assumed that we knew when you said "boyfriend", that you are a gay male. There is no way for us to know unless you tell us. Had I known that part of the situation, I would not have assumed you were little love-struck juveniles that have some grand idea in their heads of how being married will be so wonderful while still living at home. It would have made sense as to why you wanted to keep it hidden.

But go ahead...decide that my answer was bad and go somewhere else where you will get real answers when you don't tell the details.

To why I don't tell my parents is because why hurt them? I'm not doing this to rebel, I'm doing this because we want to take the next step of our lives
I guess thanks but not.
the question wasn't about your opinion, so there was no reason to "disagree". What was my fault is that i left out some things.
What would have been the right answer would have been "No" or "Doubtfully"
I guess it was dumb of me using a site I never herd of. Should have went to ask.com



Hum, this site is for people to give anonymous (kind of like hiding behind a screen) advice in an open forum. Most of the advice relative to relationships is a bunch of opinions from strangers. That is what you get here. When facts are in question, most of us try our best to be accurate, but there is no proven, factual answer to your dilemma. We can tell you that if you aren't ready to stand up to your parents and own your relationship publicly, you are not ready for marriage. They might disown you / you have to choose. It sucks, but marriage is about choosing your spouse above all others when a choice must be made. If they say they don't recognize your marriage, tell your parents you don't recognize their view on this issue.

I quoted it before it gets changed yet again to something else.


Yeah... constant editing indicates you are being deceptive by trying to hide your original question.

Otherwise you ADD to the post in a followup...not by removing and completely rewriting the original question to suit answers you were given.

Seriously at this point its hard to believe anything you've told us.


You want someone to agree with you...you don't want honest answers. There is a HUGE difference between the two most times....particularly this time.

I'm sorry but absolutely no way does this sound like its from someone old enough to be living on their own for the last 4 years as you claim....it sounds exactly like someone thats 17 and living with mom and dad that doesn't have a job and is trying to have it both ways.

Sorry if you disagree, but thats exactly how it looks based on what you say, how you say it, and the fact you keep trying to cover your tracks every time something is said.

An adult stands by anything they said.....the first time without trying to hide it.


I seriously do NOT believe you have the maturity to be getting married based on everything thats happened so far on this thread.

I personally don't care WHO you are marrying...I dislike people that are dishonest and keep trying to hide things and constantly changing the question hoping to change the answers they get to suit what they want to hear.

Be honest, be upfront, don't keep going back and changing the original question . It makes you look bad and deceptive to anyone that sees it.