Since we're not going to do signatures anymore, here's a place for your favorites.

I'll start with one of my most recent:

Common sense is so rare that it should be considered a super power.

A fool and their money are soon parted.

Even duct tape can't fix stupid.

A bird in the hand is worth two in the bush

My favorite polemicist was Robert A. Heinlein:

Love is that condition in which the happiness and well-being of another become essential to your own.

Robert Overton wrote:

"No man has power over my rights and liberties, and I over no man's."

“The State is a soulless machine, it can never be weaned from violence to which it owes its very existence.” -Mahatma Gandhi

"Democracy is the worst form of government, except all those other forms that have been tried from time to time." Winston Churchill

Robert Overton wrote:

"No man has power over my rights and liberties, and I over no man's."

He lied !!! lol

Sacred Cows make great hamburger - Mark Twain

Life is a gag, laugh or choke.

"Give a man a fish and you feed him for a day; teach him how to fish and you feed him for a lifetime"

A hard head makes a soft a$$.

A word to the wise ain't necessary - it's the stupid ones that need the advice
.

A day without sunshine is like, you know, night. :)

If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month.

Another Twain:

Sometimes I wonder if the world is being run by smart people who are putting us on, or by imbeciles who really mean it.

The past is a nice place to visit but not a good place to stay

The trouble with the world is that the stupid are cocksure and the intelligent are full of doubt. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/quotes/quotes/b/bertrandru101364.html)
Bertrand Russell (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/quotes/authors/b/bertrand_russell.html)

The surest sign that intelligent life exists elsewhere in the universe is that it has never tried to contact us. (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/quotes/quotes/b/billwatter105988.html)
Bill Watterson (https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/quotes/authors/b/bill_watterson.html)

"Help! I'm having contraptions and I need my epidermal before my biblical cord gets stuck!"

Libraries are vast suppositories of information.

What goes around comes around.

"Every passing hour brings the Solar System 43,000 miles close to Globular Cluster M13 in Hercules - and still there are some misfits who insist there is no such a thing as progress."

-Malichi Constant, in "Sirens of Titan" by Kurt Vonnegut

"So it goes" - also by Vonnegut

Baines

Progress is a relative term

Since we are being all serious here...

"I think one's feelings waste themselves in words; they ought all to be distilled into actions which bring results." Florence Nightingale

I think you are barking up the wrong gumtree buddy

"There are three kinds of men: The ones that learns by reading. The few who
learn by observation. The rest of them have to pee on the electric fence
for themselves."

WILL ROGERS, *The Manly Wisdom of Will Rogers*

WILL ROGERS, *The Manly Wisdom of Will Rogers*

My favorite from the cowboy philosopher is about Learning something new every day or you wasted it.

Heinlein's Razor - Never attribute to malice that which can be adequately explained by stupidity.

I am a nobody, nobody is perfect, therefore I am perfect.

I like Albert Einstein

I just want to know the thoughts of God, everything else is just the details

The solution to most of the problems of Western Civilization in the style of Robert Ludlum: It is too your fault. Think about it.

"If you hire people just because they can do a good job, they'll work for your money.

But if you hire people who believe what you believe, they'll work for you with blood, sweat and tears"

Simon Sinek