My oldest daughter will begin kindergarten this coming fall. I'll be honest and confess that I've been a lenient parent as far as teaching her things goes. Frankly I don't know how to talk to kids, even my own.

Obviously schooling methods have changed since I was a kid and I don't know what things she should know or what she’ll learn when she gets there.
I know I need to teach her her name, phone number and address. But what else? Should she already know the alphabet? Count higher than ten? Be able to tell time? Other things I haven't even thought about? I’ve got a whole summer to teach her as much as I can and while I don’t expect a child genius, I don’t want her to feel like she’s behind or any less than the other kids.

Yes, she should know all the things you mentioned.

And it is worst than being lenient parent, a lenient parent, lets them have extra ice cream or watch a extra TV show instead of bed ( sometimes)

A parent has to be responsible. Perhaps for the rest of this year and summer you should consider having child in a pre school program geared for education.

It is not a matter of how little they have to know, but how much can they learn, and for them to establish a education mindset of learning

The most important thing is to prepare her to be able to listen to the teacher, do as she is asked, follow directions, make an effort and get along. You can help her now by giving her simple responsibilities like setting the table for dinner, putting her clothes away, making her bed and following a morning and bedtime routine such as reliably brushing her teeth, taking a bath, putting on pajamas, reading a story with you and going to bed when told. There are a lot of good books on parenting like "Parent Power" to help you. As for skills, have her count things out day to day, like have her help you pick five apples or three cans of soup at the grocery store , or have her run ten squares ahead of you on the sidewalk... or to push number 5 on the elevator. For reading, just read to her. You can get an alphabet book that teaches sounds, and any simple picture book can be used to help her start to connect that letters are associated with sounds. I truly think though, just being able to follow instructions and get along in the group is most important. If she thinks she can do whatever she wants, or doesn't mind what you say, she will have a tough time.

I am a Kindergarten teacher, so here's my answer: your daughter needs to know her colors, the letters of the alphabet (both upper and lower case), the sound each letter makes, how to identify numbers 0-30, writing numbers 1-30, shapes, how to write her first name in upper and lower case letters, how to count objects up to 30, how to build and extend patterns, more/less/equal. I could go on and on... If she is a good listener, then I hope she will listen as you try to teach her.

I wanted to apologize for not replying sooner and thank everyone for the advice. Anyhow, I drew out the alphabet, both upper and lower case and then taped them to our living-room wall. With each letter I put the corresponding number, 1 for A and so on. I also did the “A is for apple” on the same paper. Then I drew colors and shapes, and numbers 0-10. Plus I got a moveable clock. Everything is taped to that wall and is easily moved around (but out of their reach) while we learn. Hopefully this works. Thanks again everyone.

I wanted to apologize for not replying sooner and thank everyone for the advice. Anyhow, I drew out the alphabet, both upper and lower case and then taped them to our living-room wall. With each letter I put the corresponding number, 1 for A and so on. I also did the “A is for apple” on the same paper. Then I drew colors and shapes, and numbers 0-10. Plus I got a moveable clock. Everything is taped to that wall and is easily moved around (but out of their reach) while we learn. Hopefully this works. Thanks again everyone.
Sounds like a good start. Let us know if you need more ideas.