If at this final hearing for divorce, you tell the Judge that you still love your wife and don't really want to get divorced, but since you can't make someone love you and that's what she wants, your giving it to her, does he have the right or power to send us to any type of counseling ?

Forgot, this is in New Jersey

Not at that point. Maybe when the proceedings were first started.

No. In the US, anyone can get a divorce. When it will be final, and some details about splitting assets, vary by state.
The judge makes decisions about the settlement, and about any matters of child custody, after hearing both sides of the argument.

Yeah, I thought so. Thank you