Ok , my dad got a restraining order againt his new wife after things went sour in four months she bloodied his face , he was 63 she 46, he didn't have that type of anger in him. So the judge in California grants the order until2015, she continues to beg , ask for $, cry, kick etc. he does talk to her a little on ph, then desided it wasn't going to work and changed his ph #, OK she leaves state to Texas, lives with and older man who was 81 no biggie. She calls me contact him through Facebook on a page she created for him, he didn't have a computer, but I do. She begs me to talk to him that she is clean off alcohol, etc, this went on for 8 months. She catchs a flight on 10/3/13 shows up at doorstep , he gives in despite the restraining order, she claims she will be a good wife etc, three days later he's dead, she was with him. My father raised my brother and I as a single dad his whole life. We have families of our own, I go to California fr az, to console her , and see what happened, she wouldn't even give me a baby picture, or let me sit in his chair, she called the sheriff on my brother for knocking on the door, ugh she changed locks, then begs me to come back over later I do, I'm mtelling her hey dad wouldn't want you to not b OK in life I don't want $ just simple things that only matter to us our memories. My father wasn't arich man, but a vietnam vet, and a union menber for 44yrs, my mom gets a part of the retirement even now, good they can have it but why is she in charge of all arrangements, when she had a 5yr restraining order, he died from aheart attact.

If he allowed her in the home then the restraining order is pretty much null and void. It's only worth the paper it's written on, and what the victim does with it when the person he wishes to keep away from him, comes around. He invited her in, he didn't call the cops (which he could have done because of the restraining order). So really, the restraining order, in my opinion, no longer matters.

He never divorced her, she was living with him when he passed away. She is the widow, therefore making arrangements (I'm assuming you mean funeral arrangements) is her prerogative. Of course it would be nice if she included you in those arrangements, but it's not against the law for her to do it on her own.

Did your dad have a will?