Ok, here goes.

I've been in love with a girl for about 7 years (we're both 25 now) and due to differences in personality have had an on and off relationship for most of that time. We're currently in our 5th period together (she's left me 4 times because I wanted things to move more quickly than she felt comfortable with) and it's been the smoothest one by far (we've been back together for 9 months now) and the first time we've really found each other. She doesn't love me as of yet, and that's one of the things that I struggle with.

I love her unique ways and enjoy her company so this isn't me having a long moan. However, there are some things that bother me. She's not a communicator, and only tells me what she feels in times of crisis or when I ask her multiple times. She's never given me a compliment of any sort, just a 'thank you' when appropriate. When she's busy/tired/with friends or family it seems as if I'm being a nuisance when I quickly text or phone to ask her how she is. When I talk she doesn't really seem that interested in what I have to say. She's also extremely busy and rarely has time for me which is obviously not her fault, but make the negative things harder to take.

That said things have been improving and I've felt we've grown as a couple in the last while in most facets. We have good chemistry physically, share enough interests and we get on pretty well lately.

It's just that it gets incredibly tough when you've sacrificed a lot to be with her and tell her sincerely that you love her and do not know whether you'll ever hear those words back. Trust me, I have considered leaving it behind before. I just really love her, but feel discouraged and a angry quite often when one of the things that frustrates me occur.

She is Christian, a bit introverted, loves her nephew incredibly much and always talks about him, not overly romantic, independent in a quite negative way where she wants to do everything herself, not very emotional (on the surface at least) and always keeps a protective wall around her inner being.

Any help on how to be happy as equals (I'm too nice and no firm enough) and grow towards mutual love without all the frustrations would be appreciated. Any other opinions is naturally also welcome.

I don't know how after 7 years you have not honestly expressed yourself on what you expect, and breaking up so many times doesn't bode well. Maybe you both are just comfortable old shoes that are safe and secure where you are, at least she is.

You either keep going down this path, or shake it up some kind of way. At least get a more solid commitment about the future, or nothing will change. Obviously you want more than she is willing to give but 7 years??

Are you capable of being more financially? Shame after all this time you cannot communicate and establish something where you both are comfortable. Maybe this is as good as it gets. Does no good for one to be in love, and the other isn't.

That's damn frustrating. Maybe some blunt honesty is what you really need, because how could she not know your frustration.

We're both still studying unfortunately, and I have made my feelings clear to her a few times. She's just incredibly careful as she had a bad experience before me and is a bit paranoid because of it. I honestly think the pay off will be worth it at the end as she's an amazing woman when she doesn't have her protective wall around her, I'm just finding it hard being patient! Loving someone who doesn't love you back is pretty tough.

I just need a healthy way of dealing with the frustration.