My wife cheated on me on 8/23/2013. Before I knew she cheated, I had sex with her the entire week of 8/26/2013 which she also ovulated on 8/28/2013.Now she's pregnant.. Tough question. But do I have a better chance of being the father of her baby?

You won't know until the DNA test is done... and I would strongly recommend getting one done... otherwise it will be assumed to be yours.. and in a divorce even if one occurs before the birth... you will be in the hook for child support, even if its not.

How do you know she ovulated then?

How do you know she ovulated then?

Because her mucus was sticky and slimy. I didn't know what it was until I started reading up on ovulation.. Also it felt a lot different then it ever has. I was constantly hitting something every time we had sex. It even felt tighter then ever before. But this didn't start till 8/27/13. Before that it felt the same as it always has.. I was like a young guy again.. Couldn't last very long at all even though we were doing it every night..

Part of me thinks its mine because I have a lot of baby symptons. I had morning sickness, hungry a lot more, nausea, more sensitive to smell etc...

I have 2 other kids by my wife and had all the symptons with them as well..

Because her mucus was sticky and slimy. I didnt know what it was untill I started reading up on ovulation..Also it felt alot different then it ever has. I was constantly hitting something everytime we had sex. It even felt tighter then ever before. I was like a young guy again.. Couldnt last very long at all even though we were doing it every night..

MIght want to do a lot more research... there are only two ways to know when an ovulation actually happens... Basal Temprature chart... (taken daily for over a year) or a series of Medical tests to establish when it actually happens... anything else is as accurate as reading tea leaves or chicken entrails... there is a LOT of false information on the internet. I got that from Medical professionals... not the internet.

I added more to my post above.

From all the calendars on here and stuff, I think I have the better chance of it being mine and I truly hope it is. Ive accepted it as mine unless it comes out looking nothing like me at all.If he/she resembles some, I will never question it.

I know why even ask on here.. Right? Because a part of me is still angry that she even cheated.

Our doctor even said I can help deliver him/her which Ive never had that option.

From all the calendars on here and stuff, I think I have the better chance of it being mine and I truly hope it is. Ive accepted it as mine unless it comes out looking nothing like me at all.If he/she resembles some, I will never question it.

I know why even ask on here.. Right? Because a part of me is still angry that she even cheated.

Our doctor even said I can help deliver him/her which Ive never had that option.
It won't be fair to this child if you don't insist on a paternity test. The other guy is owed the knowledge that this baby is his, if it is. And someday, there will possibly be a medical or mental health issue that will arise and demand family background. And if the child grows up in your house looking like him..

It won't be fair to this child if you don't insist on a paternity test. The other guy is owed the knowledge that this baby is his, if it is. And someday, there will possibly be a medical or mental health issue that will arise and demand family background. And if the child grows up in your house looking like him..... ?
I don't think the other guy even cares to know if its his or not. He has never questioned it. He was a coworker of my wife's. My wife guarantees its mine. But I see your point. If we do a dna and it isn't mine, I don't know what I would do.

I dont think the other guy even cares to know if its his or not. He has never questioned it. He was a coworker of my wifes. My wife guarantees its mine. But I see your point. If we do a dna and it isnt mine, I dont know what I would do.

A parent is the person who raises a child. While I understand how raising a child you know is not yours can be very difficult, If it is not yours, the likelihood that it will come out eventually is too great not to know from the get go.

If it isn't mine.. Why do I get all these sympathy pains and stuff?

If it isnt mine.. Why do I get all these sympathy pains and stuff??
Did they begin before you knew she was pregnant, or after?

If it isnt mine.. Why do I get all these sympathy pains and stuff??

Because she's pregnant. Sympathy pains are psychosomatic. There is NO physical reason for the father to experience any symptoms of pregnancy. Any symptoms you might experience (and I'm not trying to minimize sympathy pains) are of your own making because you think she is pregnant.

If it isnt mine.. Why do I get all these sympathy pains and stuff??

That is just associative. They occur because you're around.

I won't put odds on this. I would expect it to be yours, but there is a chance, decent at that, that it is the co-workers.

A paternity test is almost required at this point. More so for the child's health. If there is a medical history that could impact the young one's life.

Where you go from there is going to require a lot of talking with your wife. Resolve the issue and remember that if that child isn't yours by blood it will be yours by family. Don't take the paternity of the child out on it. It's not the little one's fault. I know you think you won't, but it will ever be a sign of your wife's infidelity. This will be a huge hurdle for you.

Did they begin before you knew she was pregnant, or after?

Eating more and nausea were before I knew she was. I know because I just lost 80lbs since December by cutting way down on my eating. Then all of a sudden Im hooked on stuff I don't normally eat. Like peanut butter sandwiches (Fattening), Bananas and chocolate ice cream (I hate bananas)..

Eating more and nausea were before i knew she was. I know because I just lost 80lbs since December by cutting way down on my eating. Then all of a sudden Im hooked on stuff I dont normally eat. Like peanut butter sandwiches (Fattening), Bananas and chocolate ice cream (I hate bananas) ..

Again, this is all in your head. There is no physical reason for you to be experiencing such things.

That is just associative. They occur because you're around.

I won't put odds on this. I would expect it to be yours, but there is a chance, decent at that, that it is the co-workers.

A paternity test is almost required at this point. More so for the child's health. If there is a medical history that could impact the young one's life.

Where you go from there is going to require a lot of talking with your wife. Resolve the issue and remember that if that child isn't yours by blood it will be yours by family. Don't take the paternity of the child out on it. It's not the little one's fault. I know you think you won't, but it will ever be a sign of your wife's infidelity. This will be a huge hurdle for you.

I will most likely get a divorce.

Again, this is all in your head. There is no physical reason for you to be experiencing such things.

I understand. I had it with all my kids..

Eating more and nausea were before i knew she was. I know because I just lost 80lbs since December by cutting way down on my eating. Then all of a sudden Im hooked on stuff I dont normally eat. Like peanut butter sandwiches (Fattening), Bananas and chocolate ice cream (I hate bananas) ..
It sounds like that was more your body issue than something connected to her. (Many women don't have food cravings, especially not early on -- too busy throwing up or wishing they could.)

I understand. I had it with all my kids..

I understand, and I don't want to minimize that fact that you are experiencing this. But it is your brain that's doing it, not her pregnancy.

I wish I could just leave it alone... She swears its mine... Been talking to her all day about it...

I wish I could just leave it alone..... She swears its mine.... Been talking to her all day about it...

She can't know who's it is for sure... she might wish its yours, fact is it could be eithers. Obviously one will cause far more issues than the other... but for reasons of medical history... you really do need to know for certain who's it is.

I wish I could just leave it alone..... She swears its mine.... Been talking to her all day about it...

Of course she swears it's yours, she doesn't want her marriage to end, especially since it's very clear you'll divorce her if it's not yours, and the other guy has no interest in being a father. That leaves here with very few options.

But she can't know it's yours, no one can at this point. Only a DNA test after the baby is born will tell you who the father is. So she can swear on a stack of bibles, doesn't mean that what she believes, is fact.

You can't know until a DNA rest is done. She could have changes you described due to ovulation, or it could be because she was newly pregnant and her body was changing to accommodate the pregnancy. She also had an affair, and could be lying about the duration of the affair... she could be further along than you know. When the baby is born, a paternity test can be done.

In the meantime you have time to seek marital counseling. Whether it is yours or not, whether you stay married or divorce, you should go to counseling together to get help with this. You have other kids together and have to find a way to work things out peacefully and cooperatively even if you can't stay with her, or all the kids will be hurt.

Im just really afraid to find out it isn't mine. I will be heart broken if it isn't..

She didn't know she was pregnant until she missed her period and took a test. Im doing my best to think positive and to think it is mine. But her cheating on the 23rd is just too close to her fertility days even though Her and I had sex the entire week of her fertility and then some.

My heart thinks its mine just because is she ovulated on the 28th, his sperm were 5 days old and close to there death time. Mine were fresher and stronger and closer to her egg dropping day.

But my mind thinks the opposite because the other guy is a lot younger than me (28, I was 42 at the time)

Im just really afraid to find out it isnt mine. I will be heart broken if it isnt..

She didnt know she was pregnant until she missed her period and took a test. Im doing my best to think positive and to think it is mine. But her cheating on the 23rd is just too close to her fertility days even though Her and I had sex the entire week of her fertility and then some.

My heart thinks its mine just because is she ovulated on the 28th, his sperm were 5 days old and close to there death time. Mine were fresher and stronger and closer to her egg dropping day.

But my mind thinks the opposite because the other guy is alot younger than me (28, I was 42 at the time)

You are trying to convince yourself of something that can't possibly be determined before a DNA test is run.

Unless she was doing a Basal Temptature CHart every day... or was getting tests to determine ovulation dates you are all making wild unsubstantiated guesses... otherwise you have to assume she could get pregnant ANY day... some women get pregnant DURING their period. There is no such thing as SAFE days.

I'm betting you or her really don't have any idea when she actually does ovulate... online calendars and cell phone apps are absolutely worthless... because assuming women all ovulate on day X of her cycle is like assuming ALL women have a 28 day cycle are will be regular as celestial events... the fact is all of those assumptions would be woefully incorrect.

Statistically SOME women might actually fall on the days those predict... fact is a lot of others won't. And a broken clock is still right twice a day if you see where I'm going with that.

Trying to convince yourself she could only possibly get pergnant on certain days is both totally contrary to facts... but is going to do nobody any good.

Another fact... Her and I have been trying for another baby since December 2011 and struck out each month. Then boom.. Now she's pregnant...

Another fact... Her and I have been trying for another baby since december 2011 and struck out each month. Then boom.. Now shes pregnant...

What does that prove exactly? I'm being serious... give it a lot of thought.

Then give it some more thought... many monogomous couples with NO fertility issues might try for several years before having success.

There are a LOT of variables, a huge amount exactly... and luck does pay a factor here.

Why will one woman get pregnant the first time she has sex (even with birth control)... while another with no issues might take years of trying before she does.

You are thinking in absolutes where absolutes really have no place.

Do you think wearing a condom means you absolutely won't make her pregnant... fact is even if you do it right.. they have only a 80% effective rate... think iof she's on the pill she absolutely won't get pregnant... fact is there is still several percentage ponts of possibility. THink if you used both she ABSOLUTELY won't get pregnant... you would still be wrong because I can name two women on this site that still got pregnant... one of them more than once.


You have to stop thinking in absolutes when chance plays the largest role.

That actually leans towards the other guy. If you two had failed to conceive for almost 2 years and then it hits when she has sex with someone else it could mean you were the problem (were you tested?).

But it still all speculation.

Her and I have had 2 girls with out any problems when trying. We also had a miscarriage before our second daughter. But she got pregnant soon after that miscarriage also..

I did a home test you buy at walgreens and it came out positive.

We also tried the ovulation predictors but couldn't figure them out...

I understand what you are all saying. Its too close to call and I know a dna test will be needed.. It sucks because I wanted another baby so bad. But I want it to be mine, not someone else's..

Yeah it does suck not being able to find out for so long... but you really would be doing yourself and the child a disservice by making assumptions.

My wife has herself convinced without a doubt that it is mine... She doesn't see reality I guess..

My wife has herself convinced without a doubt that it is mine...She doesnt see reality I guess..

Well... whats the old saying... Wish in one hand... poop in the other... which gets full first?

She's going to have to face it sooner or later...

Like was mentioned.. some medical conditions run in families as do certain genetic predispositions to certain diseases (like breast or colon cancer, diabetes, or a number of others)... and you really do want to know these sorts of things.

I told her today she needs to face reality. She says she is and she knows its mine. But she can't prove it..

I told her today she needs to face reality. She says she is and she knows its mine. But she can't prove it..

DNA test after the child's birth will put that to rest... definatively (and Legally). One way or the other.

Since you aren't related to the person she cheated with... there won't be any margin of error to mull over.

Like was mentioned..some medical conditions run in families as do certain genetic predispositions to certain diseases (like breast or colon cancer, diabetes, or a number of others)....and you really do want to know these sorts of things.
Smoothy is correct. On my husband's side of the family is alcoholism, autism, and Alzheimer's. On my side there's bipolar illness, heart disease, and lots of short people. I made sure my two sons are well aware of their genetic heritage.

Well maybe with some luck and praying the baby will be mine...


How soon can you take a home pregnancy test?

If I remember correctly, my wife took one the day of or the day after her missed period and it was positive. Does that explain anything?