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paraclete
Sep 22, 2013, 09:11 PM
God went to the Arabs and said,
'I have Commandments for you that will make your lives better.'

The Arabs asked, 'What are Commandments?'
And the Lord said, 'They are rules for living.'

'Can you give us an example?'

'Thou shall not kill.'

'Not kill? We're not interested.. '

So He went to the Blacks and said, 'I have Commandments.'

The Blacks wanted an example, and the Lord said,
'Honour thy Father and Mother.'

'Father? We don't know who our fathers are.
We're not interested.'

Then He went to the Mexicans and said,
'I have Commandments.'

The Mexicans also wanted an example, and the Lord said 'Thou shall not steal.'

'Not steal? We're not interested.'

Then He went to the French and said,
'I have Commandments.'

The French too wanted an example and the Lord said, 'Thou shall not commit adultery.'

'Sacre bleu!! Not commit adultery? We're not interested.'

Finally, He went to the Jews and said,
'I have Commandments.. '

'Commandments?' They said, 'How much are they?'

'They're free.'

'We'll take 10.'


There. That, should upset just about everybody! Including Ex

Enigma1999
Sep 22, 2013, 10:10 PM
That was hilarious! :-)

paraclete
Sep 22, 2013, 11:50 PM
Here's a line that should be added;

God said I have some commandments for you and they said no bro, we just doing it all

NeedKarma
Sep 23, 2013, 04:49 AM
That was nasty.

paraclete
Sep 23, 2013, 05:50 AM
That was nasty.

Not really, just trying to liven things up but if you know them you know there are no boundries

NeedKarma
Sep 23, 2013, 08:00 AM
Gives us an insight into your mindset anyway.

smoothy
Sep 23, 2013, 09:59 AM
I loved it... :)

Enigma1999
Sep 23, 2013, 09:10 PM
I am going to share this with my Mexican, African American, and Jewish friends! They will get a kick out of this!

excon
Sep 24, 2013, 04:04 AM
Hello E:

I am going to share this with my Mexican, African American, and Jewish friends!I'm a Jew. I don't appreciate anti Semitic jokes. Your Jewish friends do?? Nahhh, they don't.

Excon

excon
Sep 24, 2013, 05:14 AM
Hello again, clete and smoothy:

You've got friends in high places... But, it doesn't STOP me. I called you BOTH out for being racists, and the posts were deleted.

I spose they'll remove this one. Maybe they're racists too.

excon

PS> (edited) Ok, to be fair, I DID swear a little bit, and maybe THAT'S why the posts were removed... But, you deserve EVERY bit of my wrath.

smoothy
Sep 24, 2013, 06:13 AM
Hello again, clete and smoothy:

You've got friends in high places... But, it doesn't STOP me. I called you BOTH out for being racists, and the posts were deleted.

I spose they'll remove this one. Maybe they're racists too.

excon

PS> (edited) Ok, to be fair, I DID swear a little bit, and maybe THAT'S why the posts were removed... But, you deserve EVERY bit of my wrath.
Ex... take a deep breath, chill out a bit and deal with the anger issues... none of us want to find out you to have had a stroke.. or heart attack.

The ten commandments are every bit as much part of the Chrsitian faith as the Jewish one.

NeedKarma
Sep 24, 2013, 06:20 AM
The ten commandments are every bit as much part of the Chrsitian faith as the Jewish one.Sure... but not this "joke".

excon
Sep 24, 2013, 06:26 AM
Hello again, smoothy and clete;

Ex... take a deep breath, chill out a bit and deal with the anger issues... Because I like you, I've refrained from blasting you for your blatant racism on the boards. No longer. Temper it, or put up with me.

I NEVER did like you, clete.

Excon

smoothy
Sep 24, 2013, 06:30 AM
Sure...but not this "joke".


If someone's that touchy they can't laugh at themselves sometimes... they have other isses to deal with...

Hell, I'm a Protestant after all... and proud of it... Part Irish in fact... (not a whole lot of German jokes out there) I'll laugh at a good Irish joke too.

Lifes too short to take everything and even yourself too seriously...

tickle
Sep 24, 2013, 06:35 AM
Exxy, I like u and your jokes, and your attitude.

Tick

excon
Sep 24, 2013, 06:36 AM
Hello again, smoothy:


If someone's that touchy they can't laugh at themselves sometimes... To SOME, racism ISN'T funny. To a racist, it IS.

Excon

smoothy
Sep 24, 2013, 06:51 AM
Hello again, smoothy and clete;
Because I like you, I've refrained from blasting you for your blatant racism on the boards. No longer. Temper it, or put up with me.

I NEVER did like you, clete.

excon

Ex... I like you too, and that's why I'm saying this, as calmly as this, you are seriously looking at things the wrong way if you think I'm a racist... and in the spirit of the fact I do like you... be really, really careful who you label a racist... because it can come back to haunt you. Because there is nothing funny in those accusations.

excon
Sep 24, 2013, 06:54 AM
Hello again, smoothy and clete

Here's some really good humor for you. I mean, you got to laugh at yourself, right?

smoothy
Sep 24, 2013, 07:05 AM
Hello again, smoothy and clete

Here's some really good humor for you. I mean, you gotta laugh at yourself, right??

Ex... calm down... I'm probibly one of the most PRO-Isreal guys on this site... and I've never seen Clete bash Jews that I remember...

paraclete
Sep 24, 2013, 05:48 PM
Gives us an insight into your mindset anyway.

Yes I admit to a mindset where certain people are concerned. I know miracles happen but they don't appear to happen in certain places

paraclete
Sep 24, 2013, 05:57 PM
Hello E:
I'm a Jew. I don't appreciate anti Semitic jokes. Your Jewish friends do??? Nahhh, they don't.

excon

Ex get a grip this is humour and humour is often based loosely in truth. I don't see why you think this is particularly anti-semitic unless it is that semites are mentioned twice. The truth is the Israelites didn't ask for the commandments they got them for free and just about everyone has failed to fall in line ever since, hell I don't remember ever cooking an unborn kid in its mothers milk, those Israelites must have been into some weird shiite

paraclete
Sep 24, 2013, 06:03 PM
Hello again, smoothy and clete

Here's some really good humor for you. I mean, you gotta laugh at yourself, right??

Ex those images aren't humour so I can understand they might upset you

J_9
Sep 24, 2013, 06:13 PM
Since this has moved from Humor and Comedy to backbiting and name calling, this thread is closed. You can do that all you want in the Discussions forums.