View Full Version : I'm going down fast
curiouslela
Aug 28, 2013, 07:38 AM
I need help I been in love with this man for 5 years and I keep catching him with hookers. Every time he tells me he's sorry and will not do it again. But I have caught him plenty of times after that.
I keep going back to him hoping he will change, but he still does it to this day. What am I to do? This is driving me crazy.
N0help4u
Aug 28, 2013, 07:46 AM
This is his nature. There is nothing you can do to change him. You need to quit doing this to yourself. Find someone that loves you back.
Oliver2011
Aug 28, 2013, 08:01 AM
Why are you setting your standards so low? Why are you settling for a guy that is cheating on you repeatedly? Do you think these behaviors are going to change?
If you are honest with yourself on answering the above you will see that it is time to move on. People show a pattern of behavior and he has shown you his.
odinn7
Aug 28, 2013, 08:02 AM
Well, the most common sense thing to do would be to dump him. He keeps doing it because you keep going back to him.
So any ideas on what kind of diseases you could catch second hand from him?
Why put up with this? Break it off with him and find someone that treats you right.
Fr_Chuck
Aug 28, 2013, 08:02 AM
Perhaps have enough self respect, enough fear or no telling what disease he may bring home, to kick him to the curb and move on.
You are the reason it is happening, because you keep taking him back, he has no reason to change, does not want to. I hope he is at least leaving 100 dollar bills under your pillow also, so that you will be getting at least as much as the hookers for the services.
Homegirl 50
Aug 28, 2013, 08:18 AM
Why would he change? This is who he is. You are the one who needs to wise up and leave this guy alone. You will not make him become something he's not, which is a faithful man.
The ball was in your corner when you took him back the first time. You leave him alone or you risk your sanity and health and stay.
curiouslela
Sep 16, 2013, 04:57 PM
Hello everybody, you all gave me good advice about being with a man who I caught cheating with hookers all the time , when I first read answers to my questions, I was really ready not to go back, you guys gave me hope but I'm new on here so I thought I was answering someone else question and I was on my own question and didn't know it cause I'm new on here and didn't know what I was doing and everyone started going off thinking I had two names and it made me feel so bad that I didn't come on here anymore.
I fell back in the same trap, I just don't understand why I can't let this guy go. I heard him telling his friend that I was 50yrs old (he's 53) and he didn't need no 50yrs old , and that he saw another woman that he wanted to and it hurt me even more and I still went back , I can't understand how I keep letting this guy do this to me, he has no money and when he get money he spend it on hookers and I don't know how to stay away from him. Can someone please tell me how to stay away, my feelings keep getting in the way every time I think I'm strong I get weak again and go back, I feel like the only way I can get him out of my life is I die. Please someone help me, I been going through this with him for 5yrs, please I need help
Wondergirl
Sep 16, 2013, 06:02 PM
A.A. gives new members sponsors that they can call when they get weak and want to take a drink. Is there someone, a male or female friend or relative who knows this guy isn't good for you, whom you can make your sponsor and who will support you and encourage you to say no to this guy?
odinn7
Sep 16, 2013, 07:02 PM
There is nothing we can really do for you. If you are so emotionally weak that you will keep going back to someone that does this to you, what can we possibly do to help?
You have to find the strength to stay away from him. He disrespects you. He cheats on you. He could potentially be giving you a disease but you still go back.
If none of this bothers you enough to stay away, you have emotional problems that we can't deal with. I am not saying this to talk bad about you or insult you... I am only saying it because there seems to be a problem. You probably should seek counseling to find out what causes you to want to be treated like garbage.
Homegirl 50
Sep 16, 2013, 07:11 PM
I think you think you might need some counseling to find out why you are addicted to someone who treats you like crap. What does he say to you to get you to come back?
I don't understand that.
curiouslela
Sep 16, 2013, 08:03 PM
There is nothing we can really do for you. If you are so emotionally weak that you will keep going back to someone that does this to you, what can we possibly do to help?
You have to find the strength to stay away from him. He disrespects you. He cheats on you. He could potentially be giving you a disease but you still go back.
If none of this bothers you enough to stay away, you have emotional problems that we can't deal with. I am not saying this to talk bad about you or insult you...I am only saying it because there seems to be a problem. You probably should seek counseling to find out what causes you to want to be treated like garbage.
U know that is very helpful, I going to keep reading this every time I feel weak, thanks I needed that
N0help4u
Sep 16, 2013, 08:05 PM
Try writing a list one one piece of paper of WHY you want him so bad
Then on another piece of paper write every little incident and detail of WHY he is no good for you.