endlesslove230
Jul 28, 2013, 01:42 PM
Recently, I've been dealing with really though moments but even if now everything it going very well, my relationship has started to stink and I know it's my fault.
I met my boyfriend about 8 months ago and my parents have been always trying to hinder us from being together for all kinds of reasons. Two months ago, my life turned into a hell and challenged me to the end of my tether. He has always been there, right beside me, supporting me at his best, therefore, my parents completely changed their mind and gave us total freedom. I know, this sounds great, the problem is that all difficulties and fights with my parents still hold me back from feeling happy and fulfilled. I cannot laugh, I cannot let go of myself and feel rexaed because I'm afraid they will destroy everything like they always did before, even though this time they promised not to do so. However, I'm too tired to get myself off the ground, I don't feel like doing anything, I don't feel like being around anyone, I just want to stay hidden in a corner and cry and cry and cry...
He feels something is going on with me and tries to change my mood, but nothing can make me feel better, not even him. It hurts to see he is not feeling comfortable in my presence and he's not turned on any more (he wouldn't have missed any chance to get laid, but now we barely have sex once a week) and I don't blame his "careless behaviour" because I know that deep inside he cares about me and wants to spend time with me but it's me who unconsciously rejects him by not being able to live in the moment.
He is a really nice guy with a very rare character and I don't want to push him away but I don't know what to do to uplift myself. I feel so dull, insecure, weak, frustrated, unattractive, apathethic... a relationship cannot grow out of these feelings and if it cannot grows... I don't wants to think that far...
Please, help me recover from this bad dream before it's not too late. I cannot let problems change me for the worse and destroy all the good in my life!
I met my boyfriend about 8 months ago and my parents have been always trying to hinder us from being together for all kinds of reasons. Two months ago, my life turned into a hell and challenged me to the end of my tether. He has always been there, right beside me, supporting me at his best, therefore, my parents completely changed their mind and gave us total freedom. I know, this sounds great, the problem is that all difficulties and fights with my parents still hold me back from feeling happy and fulfilled. I cannot laugh, I cannot let go of myself and feel rexaed because I'm afraid they will destroy everything like they always did before, even though this time they promised not to do so. However, I'm too tired to get myself off the ground, I don't feel like doing anything, I don't feel like being around anyone, I just want to stay hidden in a corner and cry and cry and cry...
He feels something is going on with me and tries to change my mood, but nothing can make me feel better, not even him. It hurts to see he is not feeling comfortable in my presence and he's not turned on any more (he wouldn't have missed any chance to get laid, but now we barely have sex once a week) and I don't blame his "careless behaviour" because I know that deep inside he cares about me and wants to spend time with me but it's me who unconsciously rejects him by not being able to live in the moment.
He is a really nice guy with a very rare character and I don't want to push him away but I don't know what to do to uplift myself. I feel so dull, insecure, weak, frustrated, unattractive, apathethic... a relationship cannot grow out of these feelings and if it cannot grows... I don't wants to think that far...
Please, help me recover from this bad dream before it's not too late. I cannot let problems change me for the worse and destroy all the good in my life!