View Full Version : My mother loves my dad more than me and doesn't care about me!
melon99218
Jul 25, 2013, 08:28 PM
My mom loves my dad and has been inseparable with him ever since before I was born. My mom does not care about me. Even if she does it doesn't seem like it. I feel very unloved. I also think I am being abused by my mother. My dad works 6 days a week from morning to night so I barely get to interact with him so I don't know if he loves me or not and on Sunday's when he's not working my parents are in their room with their door locked so I don't know what they're even doing! I am an only child so on Sunday's I always have nothing to do because my parents are doing something together and I am alone and excluded from fun. Sometimes they go on family vacations without me. I asked my mom why I couldn't go and she said she doesn't want to waste money on me! They go everywhere without me! To the zoo, to the pool and they even go to parks and once they went to disneyworld without me!
Sometimes late at night when they are in their room I can hear them saying stuff like "I love you" and stuff like that. I have no idea what they are doing since the door is locked and I can't go in. My parents never tell me they love me! They only say that to each other but not me so I feel very excluded. Once they were too busy to make dinner so my mom told me I will cook for the entire family! All by myself! And I was only 14 that time!
One time they were downstairs in the basement so I went there too to find them cuddling on the sofa and kissing which is weird to a child. As soon as my mother saw me she screamed at me "GO AWAY! WE'RE HAVING SOME TIME ALONE!" Another time it was Mother's Day and even the way my mother treats me I know I should love her so I said "I love you mommy" and gave her a great big hug. Then she was like "OK THAT'S IT! I CAN'T STAND YOU ANYMORE!" So she grabbed my hand and took my outside to the backyard. "I'll come get you tomorrow when school starts! You can sleep on the ground tonight!"
Once I tried to tell her how I feel and she just yelled "SHUT UP" at me! I try to get other help but nobody supported me. In this world I feel unloved. I cry every single day, I think I might have depression I think. That's not it. There's much more stuff she did but I can't list them all. I only told you 5% of the stuff. How do I deal with this situation? Am I being abused?
N0help4u
Jul 25, 2013, 09:03 PM
How old are you now? She made you sleep outside? Do you ever ask her why she doesn't love you? When they go on vacations who do they have watch you? Does your dad ever talk to you? Your mom never spends any time with you at all ever?
melon99218
Jul 25, 2013, 09:22 PM
How old are you now? She made you sleep outside? Do you ever ask her why she doesn't love you? When they go on vacations who do they have watch you? Does your dad ever talk to you? Your mom never spends any time with you at all ever?
Right now I'm 16.
Yes she did make me sleep outside in the backyard and there were bugs and I was miserable. She still does that sometimes.
When my parents go on vacations it's usually my aunt that watches me.
My dad doesn't talk to me much he just tells me stuff that my mom tells me but he doesn't abuse me like my mom.
No my mom never spends time with me. She just leaves me alone even when I was really little. My mom never played with me or anything. I never got to have a relationship with her.
joypulv
Jul 26, 2013, 02:55 AM
This is so unusual to hear from a 16 year old. There's something very isolated and naïve about the way you write, as though you don't know about sex, and as though you wish you were 6 again. I would even guess that you were in some remote part of the world, but you mention Disneyworld. I even wonder if you are trolling...
Where are your teenage friends? You don't have one best friend? By age 16, most teens can't wait to do less with parents and complain about not being able to spend all their time with friends.
N0help4u
Jul 26, 2013, 05:06 AM
Yeah I was thinking Troll the whole time too because they say about 'loves dad more' and locking the bedroom door repeatedly.
What about friends and doing things. Sounds like if you get a life and don't count on them much they wouldn't even miss you. So I think I'd try that. Hang out with friends and get involved in school activities or something.
JudyKayTee
Jul 26, 2013, 11:08 AM
My suggestion is simple - if your parents are locking you outside, going away and leaving you totally alone at a young age, yes, go to the Police and report the abuse. You might be placed in foster care or a group home while the investigation is conducted.
melon99218
Jul 26, 2013, 12:23 PM
This is so unusual to hear from a 16 year old. There's something very isolated and naive about the way you write, as though you don't know about sex, and as though you wish you were 6 again. I would even guess that you were in some remote part of the world, but you mention Disneyworld. I even wonder if you are trolling...
Where are your teenage friends? You don't have one best friend? By age 16, most teens can't wait to do less with parents and complain about not being able to spend all their time with friends.
I didn't mention everything that my parents do. My mom bans me from seeing my friends outside of school. They say that when friends come over it distracts their time of being alone. I would have course LOVE to spend time with my friends but my mom just says "YOU CAN SEE THEM WHEN YOU GO TO SCHOOL" and if I go to their house my mom says that's not where I live and I shouldn't be there. The reason I hate how my parents spend too much time together is because I'm really lonely and I rather be with parents than be alone. I have no one to talk to.
Yeah I was thinking Troll the whole time too because they say about 'loves dad more' and locking the bedroom door repeatedly.
What about friends and doing things. Sounds like if you get a life and don't count on them much they wouldn't even miss you. So I think I'd try that. Hang out with friends and get involved in school activities or something.
Like what I told Joy, my mom bans me from seeing my friends outside to school! Of course I wish I could be with them instead of being trapped in a place by myself. Even when we have dinner my parents eat in their room and I'm sitting in the kitchen eating alone. Even school activities. I'm not aloud to join any sports teams or activities or anything.
Wondergirl
Jul 26, 2013, 12:32 PM
I have no one to talk to.
Have you tried chatting on one or more one of the safe kid/teen sites or even with school friends?
melon99218
Jul 26, 2013, 12:34 PM
My suggestion is simple - if your parents are locking you outside, going away and leaving you totally alone at a young age, yes, go to the Police and report the abuse. You might be placed in foster care or a group home while the investigation is conducted.
Actually, my parents have been doing that since I've started school. Even when I was 4 they were doing that. I was always lonely. Even when I have my meals I'm alonr at the kitchen table while my parents are eating in their room.
N0help4u
Jul 26, 2013, 01:13 PM
You need to tell a school counselor EVERYTHING when school starts again
JudyKayTee
Jul 26, 2013, 01:16 PM
Again, if this is abusive, and it appears that it is, you need to contact the Police or CPS.
N0help4u
Jul 26, 2013, 01:26 PM
Again, if this is abusive, and it appears that it is, you need to contact the Police or CPS.. Yeah, I'm just wondering if they have the OP so constricted that they might not be able to or if police/CPS show up at the door with OP in house.
JudyKayTee
Jul 26, 2013, 01:35 PM
Nohelp, I'm not believing 80% of this - think OP is extremely needy, exaggerating, so I'm not a good Judge on what the parents will or won't let him do.
I go back to the title which is that the mother loves the dad more than OP, OP is listening in when parents are in their bedroom and so forth.
I see no point in not wanting OP around but not allowing OP out of house - ?
Don't know if this is in US, suppose it could be possible - just have my doubts. A little over the top.
Wondergirl
Jul 26, 2013, 01:35 PM
. Yeah, I'm just wondering if they have the OP so constricted that they might not be able to or if police/CPS show up at the door with OP in house.
It sounds like he/she has the run of the house (and free use of the computer) while they are in their bedroom all the time.
JudyKayTee
Jul 26, 2013, 01:39 PM
I hate when you beat me to it - no restrictions on OP posting on adult sites, on the computer, while parents are... never mind. WG got here first.
joypulv
Jul 26, 2013, 01:39 PM
I'm still having problems with this entire post.
Just for starters, you say you're an only child, but your mother made you make dinner 'for the entire family.' I don't even get the big deal about cooking dinner at age 14.
The naïve parts about sex are too-too.
The sleeping outside on the ground? Not quite right. Doesn't fit.
I'm not buying into this.
JudyKayTee
Jul 26, 2013, 01:46 PM
I think the OP is abusing the volunteers on AMHD and will return with another user name in the near future.
Spidey senses tingling.
N0help4u
Jul 26, 2013, 01:47 PM
I've have to agree with joy even when I first read this. It feels more like a what if scenerio that doesn't add up. But on the slimmest chance its real...
joypulv
Jul 26, 2013, 02:17 PM
I just spent many minutes trying to find half a dozen other posts from the last year that are written in the same style, on similar topics. I wish we had the software that could check that.
Wondergirl
Jul 26, 2013, 02:21 PM
I just spent many minutes trying to find half a dozen other posts from the last year that are written in the same style, on similar topics. I wish we had the software that could check that.
We do have a "multiple login" board to catch alias abuse.
N0help4u
Jul 26, 2013, 02:25 PM
I agree about the naiveness of this from a 16 year old, just doesn't add up. I have been noticing a lot of *coincidental* posts over the past week where wording and situations are too similar. I think they need to do a check over the past week of new names.
melon99218
Jul 26, 2013, 03:01 PM
Have you tried chatting on one or more one of the safe kid/teen sites or even with school friends?
No I haven't chatted on sites. I only talk to my friends at school.
N0help4u
Jul 26, 2013, 03:09 PM
Point being that if you are allowed to chat on sites you are able to contact the 911 in your area to get the police to your house. The way I figure is you've lived with it this long and it may be safer to be in school when the police/CPS are called to your house, but that is your call if you need them sooner than the start of school
Wondergirl
Jul 26, 2013, 03:51 PM
No I haven't chatted on sites. I only talk to my friends at school.
How did you find us?
melon99218
Jul 27, 2013, 08:59 AM
How did you find us?
I've been trying to get help for a long time. I searched the internet for any place I could get help. I found a couple of sites as well until I found this site a few days ago. I decided to try this one.
Wondergirl
Jul 27, 2013, 09:03 AM
I've been trying to get help for a long time. I searched the internet for any place I could get help. I found a couple of sites as well until I found this site a few days ago. I decided to try this one.
Did you call any of the 800 numbers for abused children?
talaniman
Jul 27, 2013, 09:11 AM
My only advice is to take this as an opportunity to be a good independent person for yourself, and not by the things you want from others that they can't give you, for whatever reason. Your parents are humans, flawed and caught up in their on stuff. As are many of us, even you, but what you can do is plan now and learn, to not only cope with them, and your situation but make yourself better.
Its only a matter of time (2 years) before you can stand on your own, and do things as you please IF you are ready when the time comes.
orangeumbrella
Jul 27, 2013, 09:58 AM
Have you talked to any other family members about how you are feeling? To feel unloved by your parents is sometimes normal as a teen, but maybe you should ask them to sit down and tell them exactly what you just old us. Tell them you want to spend more time together, tell them you want more hugs and family time and love. Tell them everything in a respectful mature way and I think things will change.
JudyKayTee
Jul 27, 2013, 10:09 AM
This is a site that gives advice, not a site that takes action. There is a big difference between asking for suggestions and calling someone to step in and help.
You need to stop talking about your problems and take steps to end them.
I will add that I have friends who are single mothers. Their children, some as young as 12, prepare dinner almost every night in order to help their working moms. I don't find this to be abusive. Sleeping outside? Yes. AGAIN, notify the Police.
melon99218
Jul 27, 2013, 10:55 AM
Have you talked to any other family members about how you are feeling? To feel unloved by your parents is sometimes normal as a teen, but maybe you should ask them to sit down and tell them exactly what you just old us. Tell them you want to spend more time together, tell them you want more hugs and family time and love. Tell them everything in a respectful mature way and I think things will change.
I have tried talking to my mom about how I feel and she just keeps yelling at my face and screams in my ear. I never been hugged by my parents and hey only hug each other. My parents just never do it with me.
All I said to my mom was "mom, I just have something that I wanted to tell you"
joypulv
Jul 27, 2013, 11:04 AM
You answer questions very selectively. I won't believe a word you say until you tell me how you can be an only child who has to cook for 'the whole family,' how you can not know about sex by the age of 16 yet be in the US, and why you haven't told the police or ANYONE about being forced to sleep outside.
I think you and 3 of your friends are sitting around giggling and betting on how long you can keep this post going. Heck, when I was 14 (52 years ago) we used to call random phone numbers and see how long we could keep the call going (or just yell something stupid and hang up). As an adult, I've had crank calls (usually porn) designed to see how long they could keep me on the phone.
The term these days is troll.
Wondergirl
Jul 27, 2013, 11:10 AM
I'm with Joy. I do not believe a word of what you say. You have the run of the house, can use a computer, have had this mistreatment supposedly happening to you since you were 4, but have never told another adult? Give me a break! You may have a great future as a writer.
N0help4u
Jul 27, 2013, 11:12 AM
Yep 16 and says, '' I can hear them saying stuff like "I love you" and stuff like that. I have no idea what they are doing since the door is locked and I can't go in.'' The hundreds of pre teen girls that I've known in the past 15 years having babies, its hard for me to believe this either.