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View Full Version : Online and never met. How do I get my boyfriend to stop talking about sex 24/7?


alexiusdj
Jun 6, 2013, 06:19 PM
I have a boyfriend obviously. Well, we've been dating for almost a year. This is a far distance relationship somewhat. I live in Indiana, he lives in Tennessee. Anyway, we haven't really met. We met off the internet. But he's real and we video chat quite a lot. Well anyway he says he in love with me. And I know that might sound strange. You’re probably thinking "how could he be in love with her, when they never have met"? Well, ha, it just kind of happens.

Like I was saying, he says he’s in love but most of the time. He’s talking about sex and sometimes I go along with it and sometimes I’m just like "I got to go". You guys are probably going tell me "just to be honest with him, and just tell him to quit". Well I would but I don’t want to make him depressed or hurt his feelings in any way possible. So if you can give me advice that would be great!

One more thing, my boyfriend is a virgin and so am I but he keeps asking me if I’ll have sex with him and I just don’t want to. I’m not ready. By the way, we are teenagers.

Wondergirl
Jun 6, 2013, 06:24 PM
Dating? How can that be?

When he talks about sex, what do you "go along with"?

joypulv
Jun 6, 2013, 06:27 PM
A guy you met online is not a boyfriend.
You haven't been dating for almost a year - you haven't dated at all.
He can't be in love with you. You've never even seen each other in person.
Whoever he is, he's just using you for getting turned on.
You do NOT know how 'real' he is. People make up all sorts of identities online.
You could be playing a dangerous game and are TOO YOUNG and naïve to be doing this.

JudyKayTee
Jun 6, 2013, 06:35 PM
Try following your own advice: "“I know. I have the same problem. Sometimes, your probably thinking "this guy means the world to me, but i think he justs wants sex, not me" yep. Been there. Done that. Just tell him. Be like, look, I don't want to talk about this. Can we change the subject, because to be honest we only live once and really there is better things to talk about. For instance, goals, what your going to do in the future. Stuff like that. You can't hide something from him. Let your emotions out. Just be straight up honest with him. Hope this helped you” https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/dating/how-do-get-boyfriend-stop-talking-about-sex-576280-2.html

Am I correct? You are having cybersex?

ScottGem
Jun 6, 2013, 06:37 PM
No you don't have a boyfriend, you have a penpal. You have no clue how many girls he is also video chatting with, how many he has expressed love for. You don't know for sure whether he is a virgin or not.

I, for one aren't going to tell you to be honest with him, because I don't believe this is a real relationship. I think he is using you. You say he keeps asking you to have sex. Is he asking you to undress during your video chats? If so, what will probably happen is you will find your pictures all over the Internet.

So forget about depressing him. If you ct him off he will just for on to some other girl he's trying to talk into it. I would tell your parents about it and report it to the police.

Fr_Chuck
Jun 7, 2013, 03:15 AM
You know I meet my wife on line, the issue is, why after a year has it not moved to real life, what is the time frame, when is someone coming to see the other.

But you say no, pretend this is real dating, you want to do your things sometimes, tell him that, so you would rather be upset or depressed than him, explain that it is not sex all the time. If it is, then you may just be cheaper than the pay sex sites to watch.

Also if you are doing online sex, like with skype or QQ, you do know there are programs that can record the video, so if you did things online, he could have been recording it.

Oliver2011
Jun 7, 2013, 04:31 AM
Good advice from everyone here. You both sound like you are way too inexperienced at relationships which would mean you are way too not ready for a physical relationship.

I hate being judgmental but this post is just gives me the willy's.

nourirannii
Jun 7, 2013, 06:08 AM
First he's not your boyfriend he's a penpal and second if he's a really good and sweet guy that you should talk to him and tell him your not ready but if he's one of the horny guys that are jerks and you know what I mean like why would you be wasting your time on something like that? I was going to say dating but I think this is not right to have a relationship online it might not be safe and he might be hiding things from you.

JudyKayTee
Jun 7, 2013, 07:24 AM
For starters this is from 2011. This is also the boyfriend's problem, not hers, to handle.

Oliver2011
Jun 7, 2013, 07:26 AM
Ohhhh. Usually I check the dates but didn't on this one. Well good. This was creepy. I am glad it is old.

JudyKayTee
Jun 7, 2013, 07:28 AM
I didn't even see you posted, Oliver - I did see that the person who called a respected member a sick b*d did post, recognized the name and so...

J_9
Jun 7, 2013, 07:34 AM
2011? This was posted yesterday, unless I'm missing something? Probably missing something.

JudyKayTee
Jun 7, 2013, 07:36 AM
This is the second time this AM I thought I was answering one question and it was posted to another - ?

Pass the coffee!

J_9
Jun 7, 2013, 07:38 AM
Handing POT of coffee to JKT!! Cream? Sugar?

ScottGem
Jun 7, 2013, 07:38 AM
Umm, the OP was posted yesterday??

Wondergirl
Jun 7, 2013, 07:38 AM
This is the second time this AM I thought I was answering one question and it was posted to another - ?

Pass the coffee!
I was just updating myself on this thread and noticed the disconnect with the mention of 2011 (which has nothing to do with this thread at all). Weird!

Oliver2011
Jun 7, 2013, 07:43 AM
I am sooooooooo conflustered.

By the way what happened toooooo spel chek onn hear?

talaniman
Jun 7, 2013, 09:27 AM
Actually the OP posted to an old thread which was closed, but it was on the same subject.