I've met this woman online about a month ago we got on really well and she suggested being friends first to which I agreed as last year I had a bad relationship! After a few weeks chatting online I suggested we swapped numbers to which she agreed. She called me a day or a few days later which was great! She told me she was going on holiday with her older sister and we would chat when she got back so we did and texted saying she said she could not do this anymore which was odd. So I asked her what was wrong and she said it was nervous so I suggested we should meet and go go-karting. She then said she would love that as mates and so my next week off work was June so we confirmed it all which was great.

I said I will go slow and we agreed before she went away that we would start as mates then go from there! Anyway we have been texting day in day out which was great she is training to be a lawyer and has got exams next month and in July. So I text her good morning and good night she did not mind that and someday she would text me “I'm busy with family”. Anyway last Friday she text me to say she was going to visit her family in another part of UK and would not be able to reply so she text me to say have a “take care chat in a week”. So I text her last Saturday to see if she was back she said "Hi not yet " so I asked her how her week was and what did she do? I got no reply until I texted good night to her she text me saying " sorry for not replying I'm busy with family and cannot text you all the time take care chat soon " I only heard from her tonight saying " how r u? Hope u r well. I’m doing exams in June so u can’t meet up. Speak to u soon. Sorry to mess up ur plans ". Considering two weeks ago those dates I gave her were okay and now suddenly changed and I booked that time off as I'm visiting a neighboring city so I said I don't want us to lose the progress we have made and let's just meet up for a few hours. She said she would see what we can do.

I said it felt strange not texting you last week. She said yes my studies and family are important to me so she then told me don't text again I can't do this she said just e-mail me details. I said I will but how about limiting texts to twice a day as I have done since she is back! She said I sent too many texts all the time considering I did not text her last week. She then blew up saying “I did not get it. A date is where you get to know each other and take it slow and she wanted to be my friend only, but I text her as if she was my girlfriend, and that I was putting her off ". She said please don't text after this take care and good luck with dating you deserve a good woman ". How can I salvage this as I want to meet her and start fresh? Any ideas, or what do I do?

My thinking is it's too late to save this. Reach out to other women for dates and coffees and meet-ups.

My thinking is it's too late to save this. Reach out to other women for dates and coffees and meet-ups.

Would it be worth sending her e-mail to apologize and leaving it in her court !

Would it be worth sending her e-mail to apologize and leaving it in her court !
Apologize for what? She's the one who needs to apologize to you.

Apologize for what? She's the one who needs to apologize to you.
I should apologize for over texting her ? What does she need to apologize for ?

My question is why you would want this to progress. She seems a little flakey especially if she doesn't want to meet. She might be focused on her studies and doesn't want a relationship right now. Find someone new.

You've only got a month of time in this so far... let it go. She sounds a little squirrely to be honest.

Maybe she found someone else... maybe you did text her too much... no way for us to really know but it sounds to me like she is a waste of time. Just let it go, don't contact her... move on.

You've only got a month of time in this so far....let it go. She sounds a little squirrely to be honest.

Maybe she found someone else....maybe you did text her too much....no way for us to really know but it sounds to me like she is a waste of time. Just let it go, don't contact her...move on.

I accidentley over text her with out realizing I was doing that ! What I found odd was she told me in advance when she was going on holiday but then when she went to Brimingham a couple of fridays ago it was out of the blue !

What does she need to apologize for ?
For getting your hopes up and then dashing them, for playing with your mind a bit, for "promising" a date and not delivering.

For getting your hopes up and then dashing them, for playing with your mind a bit, for "promising" a date and not delivering.
Well we were due to meet next month I booked time off and I was visiting the city next to hers so that's when we agreed to meet in her city !

It's a shame I can't do anything as we have a lot in common

Maybe something you did or said scared her. Some people are wary of meeting someone online. More people should be wary of meeting people online.

Maybe something you did or said scared her. Some people are wary of meeting someone online. More people should be wary of meeting people online.

She said I text her more like she was my girlfriend but she wanted to be friends first then see what happens we told each other things in private there must be a way of salvaging this like a small e-mail

She said I text her more like she was my girlfriend but she wanted to be freinds first then see what happens we told each other things in private there must be a way of salvaging this like a small e-mail
I'm getting a sense of why she cut ties with you. You are sounding needy and can't take no for an answer. You keep pushing and pushing and won't let go. Now I too am being turned off.

I'm getting a sense of why she cut ties with you. You are sounding needy and can't take no for an answer. You keep pushing and pushing and won't let go. Now I too am being turned off.

Eeerrrrggggoooo why I brought it up.

I'm getting a sense of why she cut ties with you. You are sounding needy and can't take no for an answer. You keep pushing and pushing and won't let go. Now I too am being turned off.

Sorry she is a nice girl and we have so many things in common I wonder if she will come back in her own time

Sorry she is a nice girl and we have so many things in common I wonder if she will come back in her own time
No, she won't.

Agreed - and I think I've seen this movie before.

No, she won't.
It was an honest mistake we were getting closer throughout the last few weeks she was even saying what 3 weeks ago she text me on a Sunday morning saying she was thinking of me and I said really she said yes ! What I want to know is when she went on holiday last month she told me in advance ? And then she only told me she was a going away for a week with only a few hours notice it made me suspicous and I started to worry thinking she is seeing someone else behind my back with out been honest

Behind your back? WHAT?


If she was or is seeing someone it's not behind your back because there was no relationship there therefore no commitment.

I think it is completely understandable now.

Wow dude! Are you really this desperate? You met her a month ago, oNLINE, not in person. You creeped her out, plain and simple. Don't be a creeper, women don't like that.

Wow dude! Are you really this desperate? You met her a month ago, oNLINE, not in person. You creeped her out, plain and simple. Don't be a creeper, women don't like that.

Well stated.

Maybe I was incorrect in my earlier comment about HER being the squirrely one.

It was an honest mistake we were getting closer throughout the last few weeks she was even saying what 3 weeks ago she text me on a sunday morning saying she was thinking of me and I said really she said yes ! What I want to know is when she went on holiday last month she told me in advance ? And then she only told me she was a going away for a week with only a few hours notice it made me suspicous and I started to worry thinking she is seeing someone else behind my back with out been honest

You told her you'd take it slow, then you constantly text her, even when she asks you not to. You continue, and you creep her out.

Now you're saying you were suspicious when a girl that's told you point blank that she's not your girlfriend, just wants to be friends, is seeing someone behind your back? She's not being honest? Honest about what? How more honest can she be with you? She told you from the beginning that she didn't want a relationship, but that's not what you heard. She told you many times that she was too busy to text constantly, but you did anyway, she told you she wants to be mates, not girlfriend and boyfriend, but you're already suspicious of her, worrying that she's seeing someone behind your back? How is that behind your back? She's not with you! She doesn't have to tell you anything, she can go where she wants, and date who she wants, you're not a couple!

Ya, leave her alone, and get a grip on reality.

You are trying to push yourself on her and she does not like you. Leave her alone.

You told her you'd take it slow, then you constantly text her, even when she asks you not to. You continue, and you creep her out.

Now you're saying you were suspicious when a girl that's told you point blank that she's not your girlfriend, just wants to be friends, is seeing someone behind your back? She's not being honest? Honest about what? How more honest can she be with you? She told you from the beginning that she didn't want a relationship, but that's not what you heard. She told you many times that she was too busy to text constantly, but you did anyway, she told you she wants to be mates, not girlfriend and boyfriend, but you're already suspicious of her, worrying that she's seeing someone behind your back? How is that behind your back? She's not with you! She doesn't have to tell you anything, she can go where she wants, and date who she wants, you're not a couple!

Ya, leave her alone, and get a grip on reality.

I'm guessing this isn't his first adventure in creeping someone out.

No, you get to know someone talking to them on phone, sounds like you turned into a stalker in a month. Most women will give same response