View Full Version : Should my kids give my partner a fathers day gift?
sweetiepie77
May 21, 2013, 04:23 AM
Hi all. New here. Quick question.
I lost my hubby 3 years ago and have met a new partner and the kids get on great with him. Should I bring up the subject of a fathers day present for him to my kids or just leave it for now. Kids are 13 and 15 boys.
ebaines
May 21, 2013, 04:52 AM
Obviously your new friend isn't your kids' father, so I don't see why the kids should do anything more than say "Happy Father's Day" - IF he's a father (is he?).
Cat1864
May 21, 2013, 05:08 AM
How long have you been together?
For the past couple of years, how have your sons been celebrating Father's Day or have they? I know some people use Mother's and Father's days as a time to remember parents who have passed away.
Personally, I would leave the subject alone and be ready if they bring it up. Even if you remarry or he becomes a live-in, I would leave it up to them to decide if/when they feel comfortable seeing him as a father.
Just like your relationship with him has to develop at its own pace so does theirs.
Have you talked to him about whether he is comfortable with being recognized as a father figure? Does he see himself as more their friend than as a parent?
sweetiepie77
May 22, 2013, 01:19 AM
Thanks guys. Now that I ve written down this problem , and read your comments I realise that it is better to just leave it . Thanks again :)