View Full Version : Needing help
Yupickonme4
May 17, 2013, 11:20 PM
My 16yo girlfriend is pregnant I am 31 I have already contacted 27 lawyers in Mississippi about the age of consent and it is legal for us to be together... My conser is her parents are forcing her to move over 3 hours away and are saying they are going to keep my child and gifriend "hidden" from me and not let me be in their lives... What can I do... And if you only going to reply with stupidity and ignorance please just don't even bother replying...
J_9
May 17, 2013, 11:27 PM
You can't do anything. Since she is a minor, her parents have the right to keep their child from adult perverts any way they so choose.
Yupickonme4
May 17, 2013, 11:35 PM
You can't do anything. Since she is a minor, her parents have the right to keep their child from adult perverts any way they so choose.
First of all I am not a pervert... Second you didn't read all of what I said so if your just going to browse the Internet to make arrogant remarks to people who needing advice waste someone else's time... Not everyone in this world is a bad person or have the wrong intentions
J_9
May 17, 2013, 11:39 PM
A 31 year old man has no business being with a 16 year old child. You will not find one member of this site that will agree with you, and I was much nicer than any of the responses you will get to this question.
I read all of what your wrote, and if that were my daughter I would be keeping her away from you also.
Yes, her parents CAN take her and hide her from you as she is still a minor and under their control.
if your just going to browse the Internet Oh, I'm not browsing the internet, I am a moderator of this site.
If you don't have very thick skin you won't want to read the responses you get from some of the more vocal members of this site.
Yupickonme4
May 17, 2013, 11:51 PM
My question has to do with the unborn child what can I do to keep them from taking my child from me... Both of my gfs parents talk down to her calling her names they stripped her room and she only has a bed in her room my family and I truly care for her and want her to live with us not only for my gfs well being but also out of concern for the unborn child as well. I can't help that the person I happened to fall in love with happens to be 15 years younger than me.. 200 years ago there would not even be one problem with this.. I am worried that they move they will mistreat my child because of our ages..
J_9
May 17, 2013, 11:58 PM
It sounds like her parents are good parents and punishing her for her wrongdoing.
Don't give me the 200 years ago BS. This isn't 200 years ago, not very mature sounding for a 31 year old. That's the sort of thing teens say.
The only thing you can do is register with your State's Putative Father's Registry.
You might want to consider getting some counseling as well.
Yupickonme4
May 18, 2013, 12:05 AM
Them stripping her room was not out of punishment her 14 yo sister has had sex with 43 guys does drugs skips school and she gets what ever she wants.. My girlfriend has good grade only had sex once no drugs goes to church yet her parents do not take care of her me and my family does I buy her clothes I buy her food so don't even go there about the punishment bs they have been treating her like this for 3 years now...
J_9
May 18, 2013, 12:19 AM
I'm sorry, but the advice will not change.
She is a minor, her parents can, and should, hide her from you.
Yupickonme4
May 18, 2013, 12:21 AM
I'm sorry, but the advice will not change.
She is a minor, her parents can, and should, hide her from you.
Well... Ill seek help else where because you are not even understanding anything I am saying
J_9
May 18, 2013, 12:24 AM
I completely understand what you are saying, it's YOU that doesn't understand that she is under the control of her parents because she is a minor.
As far as being the father of her child and wanting rights to that child, you sign up for the Putative Father's Registry for your state prior to the birth of said child.
joypulv
May 18, 2013, 12:54 AM
Why 27 lawyers? You can find all this information in 5 minutes online.
The age of consent as you know is 16.
However emancipation is very difficult in Miss, and although marriage is a key reason, you can't marry her when she is 16 without parental permission.
EMANCIPATION TODAY | 12th CHANCERY COURT DISTRICT OF MISSISSIPPI (http://chancery12.wordpress.com/2011/08/22/emancipation-today/)
Emancipation is her only hope, and the court can make concessions outside of the specified requirements on a case by case basis.
(I always worry when one parent refers to a child as 'my' child. It always causes problems down the line. I hope you will say 'our' in the future.)
Yupickonme4
May 18, 2013, 12:57 AM
Why 27 lawyers? You can find all this information in 5 minutes online.
The age of consent as you know is 16.
However emancipation is very difficult in Miss, and although marriage is a key reason, you can't marry her when she is 16 without parental permission.
EMANCIPATION TODAY | 12th CHANCERY COURT DISTRICT OF MISSISSIPPI (http://chancery12.wordpress.com/2011/08/22/emancipation-today/)
Emancipation is her only hope, and the court can make concessions outside of the specified requirements on a case by case basis.
(I always worry when one parent refers to a child as 'my' child. It always causes problems down the line. I hope you will say 'our' in the future.)
Yes the baby is our baby I said mine being from my point of view and thank you actually replying to my post instead of being narrow minded
joypulv
May 18, 2013, 01:17 AM
Yes the baby is our baby I said mine being from my point of view and thank you actually replying to my post instead of being narrow minded
I'm actually very disapproving and don't consider myself narrow minded. It is your responsibility as an adult to think of the consequences of pregnancy when having sex with a teen, who isn't really able to see how it will rob her of her youth for the next 18 years. It was selfish of you. A 16 year old should be out having fun and thinking of college or career and seeing the world, not sitting at home with her in laws and changing diapers.
J_9
May 18, 2013, 01:24 AM
I'm not narrow minded either, I'm a responsible parent.
joypulv
May 18, 2013, 03:19 AM
AND...
'I said mine being from my point of view' is precisely my worry, which you don't seem to get. Those are people who do all their thinking from their point of view without regard to the other person.
J_9
May 18, 2013, 03:30 AM
This story is so sick and perverted on so many levels. It leaves me wondering if the OP has congitive and/or mental defecits in that he does not understand just how wrong it is for him, a 31 year old man, to be with her, a 16 year old child.
cdad
May 18, 2013, 04:17 AM
First of all I am not a pervert ... Second you didn't read all of what I said so if your just going to browse the Internet to make arrogant remarks to people who needing advice waste someone else's time ... Not everyone in this world is a bad person or have the wrong intentions
Actually you are a pervert and a child molester. Also I hope they throw the book at you. What the lawyers told you was only partly true. The age of consent is only one part of the equation. You can be put in prison for many other things that you have already violated. So if the parents push it your not going to see your child anyway since you will be behind bars.
J_9
May 18, 2013, 04:31 AM
I find it ironic that the subject title of his thread is "needing help." It's quite obvious that the OP needs help, but not the kind he is actually looking for.
cdad
May 18, 2013, 04:50 AM
I find it ironic that the subject title of his thread is "needing help." It's quite obvious that the OP needs help, but not the kind he is actually looking for.
The fact of calling lawyers over and over again already shows his mindset. He knows what he did was wrong and is just trying to find out what he can get away with to control this child's life.
ScottGem
May 18, 2013, 04:54 AM
First, do not even presume to dictate who can answer your questions and how. When you post a question on a site like this you open yourself up to any answer that does not violate our rules.
Second, clearly you understand that having sex with a minor is frowned on by society. You, as an adult should have never gotten involved with a child. I have to wonder what the circumstances where that you even got involved with her.
Someone is considered to be a pervert when they are sexually attracted to minors. So yes you are a pervert. That you may only be attracted to this one child may be a mitigating factor. But, again, as an adult you should have known better.
Your 27 attorneys were right. Under MS law you cannot be prosecuted for having sex with a 16 year old. But why didn't you ask the 27 attorneys about your legal rights to the child?
As noted you can file with the putative father's registry, but the parents still control her. There is nothing you can do about that control until she is 18. And that is that.
hkstroud
May 18, 2013, 06:11 AM
If she were my daughter you wouldn't be here asking questions.
J_9
May 18, 2013, 06:13 AM
If she were my daughter he would be looking down the barrel of my husband's .38!
joypulv
May 18, 2013, 06:16 AM
Getting back to the law, I think you might want to calculate how old she was when she conceived. If well enough before her 16th birthday to make a judge satisfied that you had sex with her then, you are liable to be charged with statutory rape. Something to think about if you pursue this, and her parents hire a lawyer.
Fr_Chuck
May 18, 2013, 06:35 AM
Sorry, a 30 year old man does not date a 16 year old, there is just something wrong. And yes, you are lucky the parents did not decide to take law into own hands, most fathers would.
But yes they can keep their child from you. You can file for visitation of your baby, but could may not allow it,
Wondergirl
May 18, 2013, 06:54 AM
My gf had sex once
Only once? That's all it took to get her pregnant?
J_9
May 18, 2013, 07:21 AM
Only once? That's all it took to get her pregnant?
But 27 attorneys? That's what gets me.
Yupickonme4
May 18, 2013, 07:43 AM
I am not looking for aprroval from anyone nor do your hateful comments bother me... Just because I had sex with a 16yo girl one time you brand me as pervert a child molester well I don't see it like that I never forced her into anything she know exactly what she was doing and it is what she wanted so for you to assume you are right why not try and find out the whole story before loading your guns and lighting you tourches... You say that a 16yo to a child yet an 18yo is an adult well think of this there are 13 and 14 yo who are more mature than some 18yos so it's not the age it how mature the person is and y'all being proud parents would you like your 18yo daughter date a 50yo man if the 18yo has the maturity of a 12 yo? No I didn't think so... So don't jump down my throat saying I am evil or a bad person my girlfriend is more mature than most of the woman my own age. And she got pregnant 7 months after she turn 16. But as always thanks for all the nice and helpful comments
Wondergirl
May 18, 2013, 07:54 AM
I am not looking for aprroval from anyone
And we're not giving it to you.
nor do your hateful comments bother me...
Hateful? No, not that. Realistic, yes. Honest, yes. Legal, yes.
she know exactly what she was doing and it is what she wanted
It wasn't her call as a minor and as a child to "agree." It was your responsibility as an adult to know the boundaries and limits of behavior with a minor. She's the victim in this.
find out the whole story
There IS no "whole story." She's a minor (her "maturity" has nothing to do with anything) and you, as an adult, raped her.
odinn7
May 18, 2013, 07:59 AM
I have to say, if this was my kid... you wouldn't be writing this.
But anyway, you got your advice that you came looking for and that was that there is very little that you can do since her parents have control and you don't.
Find someone else to prey on.
Yupickonme4
May 18, 2013, 08:11 AM
I have to say, if this was my kid...you wouldn't be writing this.
But anyway, you got your advice that you came looking for and that was that there is very little that you can do since her parents have control and you don't.
Find someone else to prey on.
Prey on? Wow
odinn7
May 18, 2013, 08:20 AM
Yes... Prey on.
A 31 year old guy has no business messing with a minor. What about a 16 year old girl gets you going? Her mind? Her views on politics? Her vast life experience? No... she's young and you're interested in her for sex... well, unless you have some sort of mental issue (other than being a twisted perv) that brings you mentally down to the level of a 16 year old.
So yeah... you aren't interested in adult women near your age... you prey on underaged girls.
joypulv
May 18, 2013, 08:21 AM
Bottom line: you can sign up for Putative Father and she can go to court to apply for emancipation.
You asked under the Law category and I bit my tongue trying to stay on topic. But you were being high handed from the very first, and I for one lost my cool. Not just high handed, but cluelessly unaware, such as saying things like she knew what she was doing. Yes, she knew what sex is and she willingly had it, but she didn't really understand the CONSEQUENCES, which is what this is all about. The Rest of Her Life.
ScottGem
May 18, 2013, 09:11 AM
You still don't get it. No matter how mature you think she is (or she really is) she is still a child and you, as a supposedly mature adult, should have stopped it. That's what you don't seem to get.
Maybe our comments are hateful, but that's because you committed a hateful act. By your accounts this is a teenager who feels abused by her parents (stripping her room, allowing her sister to run wild while she is restricted). So she was vulnerable and you, apparently, took advantage of her. It is just too bad that the law can't do something about it. Hopefully, holding up a mirror to show you how others see you may get through to you. But I suspect it won't
But the bottom line is you can do almost nothing until she turns 18.
AK lawyer
May 18, 2013, 10:22 AM
But 27 attorneys? That's what gets me.
I suspect that he made that part up (if not all of it). He may be trolling.
Or, if he did really consult 27 attorneys, his conscience is compelling him to find someone to tell him he committed a crime. Similar to what drives serial killers.
Alty
May 18, 2013, 11:04 AM
I have a question.
You mentioned that she can live with your family, that your family buys her things and would take care of her. Who is this family that you live with? Wife and kids, or do you still live with your parents?
I smell a troll.
joypulv
May 18, 2013, 12:15 PM
ScottGem, she is not an adult until she is 21, believe it or not.
"The age of majority is the legal age established by state law at which a person is no longer considered a child. In most states, a person has reached the age of majority at 18. Two states (Alabama and Nebraska) set the age of majority to be 19 and one, Mississippi, sets the age of majority at 21." -lawserver.com
Although as another site (msfiduciary.com) points out, it depends on the situation. For some purposes it's 18, and for a married or emancipated person under 21, some rights are available.
ScottGem
May 18, 2013, 12:21 PM
ScottGem, she is not an adult til she is 21, believe it or not.
"The age of majority is the legal age established by state law at which a person is no longer considered a child. In most states, a person has reached the age of majority at 18. Two states (Alabama and Nebraska) set the age of majority to be 19 and one, Mississippi, sets the age of majority at 21." -lawserver.com
Although as another site (msfiduciary.com) points out, it depends on the situation. For some purposes it's 18, and for a married or emancipated person under 21, some rights are available.
That's interesting. They can have sex at 16 but aren't adults until 21! Think that MS legislators are confused?
Alty
May 18, 2013, 05:23 PM
That's interesting. They can have sex at 16 but aren't adults until 21! Think that MS legislators are confused?
I agree. It blows my mind actually. If you think about the laws they really make no sense. You can have sex at the age of 16, but can't legally leave your home without being emancipated. You can vote, go to war for your country, at the age of 18, but aren't really an adult until the age of 21, you can't even drink in most states until the age of 21. But you can carry a gun and defend your country, no problem with that.
Frankly, the laws really don't make a heck of a lot of sense. They really need to rethink a few things.
But, I'd still like to know which family the OP is referring to when he says that his family will take care of his pregnant 16 year old girlfriend. Most 31 year old adults don't live with mommy and daddy, they work, they have a career, their own place. So who is this family he lives with that will care for her? The wife and kids? Doubt it.
Yupickonme4
May 19, 2013, 12:42 AM
I agree. It blows my mind actually. If you think about the laws they really make no sense. You can have sex at the age of 16, but can't legally leave your home without being emancipated. You can vote, go to war for your country, at the age of 18, but aren't really an adult until the age of 21, you can't even drink in most states until the age of 21. But you can carry a gun and defend your country, no problem with that.
Frankly, the laws really don't make a heck of a lot of sense. They really need to rethink a few things.
But, I'd still like to know which family the OP is referring to when he says that his family will take care of his pregnant 16 year old girlfriend. Most 31 year old adults don't live with mommy and daddy, they work, they have a career, their own place. So who is this family he lives with that will care for her? The wife and kids? Doubt it.
When I said my family we all love together on 40 acres we have our own houses but live close enough that we all help each other but it will be me that supports our child I am not trolling I was simply asking what I could legally do about our child and everyone blows everything out of proportion calling me a perv and other things yes I am an adult and you can say what ever you like about me don't hurt me in the least... But at least I am willing to find a way to support our child and not just run off like some deadbeat dad the fact I the matter is our child needs both parents I will not just abandon out child because people think I have committed a crime or an immoral act when I was 16 I moved out of my parents house and have supported myself since is it too much to ask to be there in our child's life I am sure all you responsible parents who have posted comments would not just turn their back on their own children so how is it any different for me to want our child be in my life and me support the child and as for the 27 lawyers I was trying to find legal ways to ensure that her parents could not just take the baby away to live in who knows what kind of home if they trea their own daughter so poorly it worries me that they might treat the baby even worse no matter how you look at it me wanting to support our child is not wrong of me I did not take advantage of my girlfriend our baby is what she wanted she knows what it means to care for a child she does it all the time with her sisters 2 children who's fathers have nothing to do with so I refuse to belittle myself and abandon our child so you say I prey on minors you are wrong we have been dating for awhile with her fathers approval but the one time we had sex and she became pregnant he turn his back on us he has full custody of my girlfriend her mother does not se walked out on her children and only resently has tried to be the mother she never was to them so say what ever you like or want to say no matter if she is only 16 and not 18 me being there for her and our child is the right thing to do so you say my intentions with her are only for sex you are mistaken I truly love her and physical connection is a minor thing to me granted she ha not tracked the world, follow who our president is, or have a phd, she don't want nor care about all of that but yes she has plans for her life that involes both me and our child and has already applied to 2 colleges and went she graduates next year will be enrolling in the course she wants fully supported by me and yes even my family I work while she is in school and child care is just next door day or night so call me fake or a perv or what ever but no of you have lived my life or hers so who are you to judge how we live our lives I posted on here out of concern for the unborn child not to get into a pissing contest
J_9
May 19, 2013, 01:09 AM
You really are a sick and demented creature. You need some help in a bad way.
Yupickonme4
May 19, 2013, 01:12 AM
You really are a sick and demented creature. You need some help in a bad way.
Well thank you but nothing you say will change anything
joypulv
May 19, 2013, 01:47 AM
I can see some real caring in you, and I see a bit of the tough childhood she seems to have had according to what you say... and the fact that you responded to all the accusations we gave you in this way is encouraging, and shows that you don't just lash out or run.
Yupickonme4
May 19, 2013, 01:56 AM
I can see some real caring in you, and I see a bit of the tough childhood she seems to have had according to what you say... and the fact that you responded to all the accusations we gave you in this way is encouraging, and shows that you don't just lash out or run.
And why would I lash out and run I knew talking about this that there was going to be a lot of negitivity yet I still posted I have nothing to hide so even though I may seem like a monster to some people I only want to do what is right for our child and some will say there is no right well I say there in no wrong either ever person is made differently that why we seek out love and compassion not only sex it's built in our DNA to not be one person but many people as a whole and it's in my belief to support our child no matter what age
joypulv
May 19, 2013, 03:05 AM
I'd guess that at least 90% of the people who come here would have lashed out and run by the 10th response or so.
I still don't APPROVE of your behavior. That's different from seeing you as caring. I still think you are selfish first and thoughtful second. You didn't even use birth control!
ScottGem
May 19, 2013, 03:19 AM
Ok, so maybe you aren't sick and demented. But you are still wrong. You took advantage of this girl. She clearly was vulnerable. For you to even have dated her was wrong and you should have known better. I'm wondering how you even came to know her since you should not have run in the same circles. Everything you have said says to me that you took advantage of a troubled girl. And I'm shocked that her father agreed to let you date.
But you crossed an even bigger line when you had sex with her. Whether she wanted it or not, you should have known better.
I'll give you props for standing up and wanting to support the child. But you need to acknowledge, if only to yourself, that you were wrong for being in this relationship and even more wrong for having sex with her
As for your legal question, its been answered.
Yupickonme4
May 19, 2013, 03:34 AM
Ok, so maybe you aren't sick and demented. But you are still wrong. You took advantage of this girl. She clearly was vulnerable. For you to even have dated her was wrong and you should have known better. I'm wondering how you even came to know her since you should not have run in the same circles. Everything you have said says to me that you took advantage of a troubled girl. And I'm shocked that her father agreed to let you date.
But you crossed an even bigger line when you had sex with her. Whether she wanted it or not, you should have known better.
I'll give you props for standing up and wanting to support the child. But you need to acknowledge, if only to yourself, that you were wrong for being in this relationship and even more wrong for having sex with her
As for your legal question, its been answered.
And I thank you for the answer to my question
cdad
May 19, 2013, 06:06 AM
And why would I lash out and run I knew talking about this that there was gonna be a lot of negitivity yet I still posted I have nothing to hide so even though I may seem like a monster to some people I only want to do what is right for our child and some will say there is no right well I say there in no wrong either ever person is made differently that why we seek out love and compassion not only sex it's built in our DNA to not be one person but many people as a whole and it's in my belief to support our child no matter what age
Classic denial of a pedophile. You really need help and you really need to stay away from this family and molesting their children. How long have you been adoring the sister too?
You really do need to walk away and get help. I find it hard to believe that a father would allow a grown man to date a 15 year old daughter. There needs to be intervention here.
J_9
May 19, 2013, 06:09 AM
Yes, he is sick and demented. No rationally sane 31 year old man would prey on a 15/16 year old child.
While wanting to provide for the baby in question is commendable, the OP doesn't comprehend that his actions with this child are perverse and he wants to continue this relationship.
This man is just sick and twisted.
cdad
May 19, 2013, 06:15 AM
Yes, he is sick and demented. No rationally sane 31 year old man would prey on a 15/16 year old child.
While wanting to provide for the baby in question is commendable, the OP doesn't comprehend that his actions with this child are perverse and he wants to continue this relationship.
This man is just sick and twisted.
The funny part is how the story changes to fit the OP. If her parents were so willing on the relationship then they wouldn't stand in the way. Wonder why the change?
J_9
May 19, 2013, 06:16 AM
Wonder why the change?
Are you smelling what I'm smelling?
cdad
May 19, 2013, 06:17 AM
Are you smelling what I'm smelling?
Nah.. got allergies ;)
J_9
May 19, 2013, 06:18 AM
Ah, it's the smell of troll. Take a deep whiff.
cdad
May 19, 2013, 06:21 AM
Ah, it's the smell of troll. Take a deep whiff.
Eww. Are you trying to ruin my breakfast?
I wonder what level of education the OP is because the style keeps changing and they don't seem to know how to form sentences...
J_9
May 19, 2013, 06:32 AM
You see, the OP chose the username "Yupickonme4," which means he/she is going to get picked on. The he/she chooses an emotional subject that is going to raise the hair on the backs of any parent in an effort to be picked on.
Now, in the original story, the girl's parents want to move her 3 hours away and keep her and her baby hidden from him.
forcing her to move over 3 hours away and are saying they are going to keep my child and gifriend "hidden" from me and not let me be in their lives
But... The story somewhat changes here...
have been dating for awhile with her fathers approval
The OP has contacted 27 attorneys, and the OP's supposed girlfriend's sister has had sex with 43 people. The numbers are outrageous. The OP's family is okay with the relationship, etc... do you see where I'm going? The story is completely fabricated and outrageous, not one ounce of truth in the entire thread.
This is the classic M.O. of a troll here on AMHD, they always pick usernames that coincide with their "story/problem." They always choose topics that are near and dear to the hearts of reasonable caring people. I've been here long enough to know when a story rings true and when there is a troll.
Yupickonme4
May 19, 2013, 06:34 AM
The funny part is how the story changes to fit the OP. If her parents were so willing on the relationship then they wouldnt stand in the way. Wonder why the change?
Umm maybe the fact that she got pregnant