I've been dating the most wonderful guy in the world for two years now-He does not flirt, cheat, watch or look at porn, like or talk to other girls, do drugs, drink, bully, or abuse. He's practically perfect, except for being extremely protective and guard-like over me, which is fine, but can sometimes make me feel suffocated and sometimes I wonder if he thinks I would cheat on him. (I wouldn't, he is extremely attractive, sweet, loyal, faithful, polite, and respectful towards me so I treat him the same way). And we are the best of friends! We like and hate almost all the same things and he is going to boot camp for the Marines in a few months. Everything was perfect-until his mother got me alone. Last week, he had to leave for a senior backpacking trip with school (I did not attend, as I am a junior) and his dog Sarge (who we adopted together) had to be at his "first day of school," at the Pet store. His mother needed me there because she signed up her dog as well, and with Elijah being gone needed someone else's help-me. I was happy to do so and was excited to bond with the mother of the love of my life, because prior to this occasion we had been around each other a lot, but never alone together. She picked me up from his grandmother's house (was normal like she usually is at the house) and then the whole car ride there told me off in the coldest, most ice-queeny way possible. To sum up what she said in as little writing as possible, she told me I needed to "stay out of his way, not get in the way of his military career" "not guilt trip or slow him down", Which was odd because if anyone is slowing anyone down, its HIM slowing down ME. When he said he was joining the military for me I told him; that's great pal, good luck, and I guess I'll see you as a friend from now on. I did not guilt trip him or anything (Btw this happened a year ago) and he held onto me, balling, saying that I could kill him and he'd still love me, that I'm the only thing he's ever loved, and all this teary eyed begging. I stayed with him because I realized I was not entirely educated on the life that would lead and that it would actually be fun and perfect for us, and also because I loved him since the day we met.
But here his mother is, verbally abusing me and trying to scare me away, I suppose that was her intent, and I tell him, crying my eyes out and he comforts me and tells me everything will be all right. Then he gets home and of course his mother tells him I said things I ACTUALLY DID NOT SAY and he believes her. It was the worst experience of my life and he takes her side and calls me a liar. In this past 10 days since it happened, He's said "F**k you" to me, called me a b*tch, for the first time and is depressed around me, and won't even make love to me even after I convince him to have a nice day with me where we laugh and hug like we used to, and being tall, skinny, and blonde, I am definitely not hard on the eyes if you know what I mean.(Sorry if that came off self centered but its about time I said it somewhere, I always act like I'm not pretty otherwise, even though he makes me feel like the prettiest girl in the world.)
I don't know what to do! He says he wants to marry me and be with me forever, but I am a strong, proud, and independent woman and I feel like he shouldn't be getting away with this-and neither should his ogre of a mother. Please help! What else can I say or do to fix this mess? How can I make him see that I'm telling the truth? He says he can't believe his mother would say this to me and that I'm clearly the liar, and when he does this it hurts me emotionally, so bad that I can't eat, sleep, or work out. I find myself wondering if I want to marry a guy who would do this to me/let this happen, even though he's been so great. I understand it's his mamma and all but really? Is his behavior normal even if I am the love of his life? Should I stay with him or give him an this or that alternative? What do you all think?

At least this has happened before you married him. You know what kind of woman she is, I can only imagine what kind of mother-in- law she'd be.

Because she caught you totally off guard in the car, you must have been gobsmacked with her remarks. Then she adds to it by claiming words you never said, and fuels the growing rift between you and your boyfriend, by being ahead in the 'who do I believe' game on your boyfriends part.

Talk about being between a rock and a hard place!

I would immediately stop talking about her, and fanning the flames. Don't mention her name, and tell your boyfriend that you will keep a respectful distance and always be polite, but you will never allow another conversation like the one you had with her, happen ever again.

Then stick to it. As hard as it might be- you being silent essentially ends your relationship with her (except in a very limited way). Refuse to engage in any conversations, even if she says you shot her a dirty look at the grocery store. Just ignore her. She is a bully, and she is pulling out all strings to keep her son to herself.

Keep your relationship between ONLY you and your boyfriend. Do not share anything with his mother.

In my experience, it is unlikely that she is able or willing to change, no matter if you presented her with tape recordings of her miserable behaviour. It will only cause further problems.

Keep it simple. Stop with the mother in law, stick to your guns, and remember that it is him you are interested in. Not his family. Keep contact with her to a bare minimum, and don't engage in any arguments that have to do with her.

Stay away from his mother and leave him alone to lick his wounds. It is going to be hard for him going away to boot camp and leaving a 16/17 year old girl friend behind. Give him space. If he wants you to continue to be his girl he needs to show you some respect or leave you alone.