I have been going out with this girl for 4 years and some months now until she broke up with me this month. We started dating in 2008 and in 2009 she got pregnant but never knew she was. I called her and told her she was pregnant that first month but she refused to believe me. She came to school from the semester break and the second month her stomach began to swell I told her she was pregnant the second time but no she still maintained she was not and said that air was passing through her belly button that was why her stomach was swelling up.

I never said anything again until the fifth month then she decided to go for a pregnancy test. We went for it and it came out positive, she felt devastated and because of the fear she had for her parents she decided to abort the pregnancy which I told her not to. We later left the school and travelled to another state and did the abortion there. It was a painful experience for the both of us. We came back to school and the abortion fell on the period we were taking exams. She tried writing the exams but she couldn't and when the results came out she discovered she was withdrawn from school at the time so finally I worked a transfer into another department for her not after the first semester the Head Of Department in which she was transferred to said he doesn't want any transfer students so she had to leave with some others.

Later on she wrote jamb and she passed and when it came to write the exams that qualifies her for entrance into the higher institution she failed and we had to do everything illegally possible for her to get into school but it failed and now she doesn't want to date me anymore what should I do please?

Continue with your own education and let her figure herself out without you. You clearly are pushing her on a path she is not prepared for, and need some time to get her head together, and find her own.

All right thanks but I truly love her and still want to help out

Wow, how old are you guys? Her excuse for her stomach swelling was bazaar and abortions can really make a woman sad. My mom said the baby is like a part of you, when I asked her about a miscarriage (I didn't have it! My friends mom did) and she said it would be like a part of you dying. What is worse is she probably feels like she killed it. (She technically did, screw her parents, at least do adoption or something ) I would say tell her how you feel, but there is no sense of pushing it, if she doesn't feel that way towards you guy's relationship, then she doesn't. Her being in a relationship she isn't in with her heart will only cause you and her a of problems, it will cause you heart ache. Who knows, give it awhile and she may come around. Personally speaking, if you guys have been together for that long and she would go and destroy your child you guys irresponsibly made even when you weren't okay with it , then she doesn't seem that nice any way. She should care about what you think too. This is why parents suggest to wait until marriage to have sex.