For all those men out there... why are guys afraid or not willing to go to counseling if wives ask to go?

Because we think that we are not the problem - you are. :D

I think a lot of people - men and women - that refuse to go to counselling do so because they feel like they are "admitting" something is wrong with them.

They don't view it as "sorting out thoughts", or "getting better presepctive", or "learning something new that can help"... it's all about "I'm broken or wrong and you want me to get fixed".

I think that men feel that if you have to go to counseling it may already be too late...

In my teaching experience women were always the higher percentage of those who sought out help.

Yes... it might be different when you are talking marriage woes versus chemistry. Or not.

Seriously... in our available voluntary help sessions the breakdown was probably 70% female... many of whom were doing very well in the class... they just wanted more info or to see different angles.

Same thing with office hours. More women came in for help or questions than men. And again, I don't think it had to do with a higher proportion of women needing the help. I think they sought out help more naturally.

Same thing with physical fitness. I know more women who have a workout partner than men. Me? Ill go on the treadmill or do weights and usually find someone there with me more distracting. Id rather grind it out alone.

My wife is the opposite. She's fine to go running or workout alone, but shed rather have someone else there and likes being accountable to another person.

So while I hate to generalize and say women are this and men are that... in my experience women are simply "wired" differently than men, more willing to self examine and seek out help.