View Full Version : Seeing a married man and know I must stop
SAbrokenheart
Mar 18, 2013, 11:32 PM
I am seeing a married man for a few weeks already I try my best not to make contact with him but he makes it difficult not to talk to himor see him.
We met a few weeks ago and from the word go I knew he is married as we spoke a lot about his wife and child. I am going through a divorce now so he knows about my ex and my kids my kids enjoy it when he is with us and that makes it more difficult to stay away from him. We can just spend hours together and not even talk but it feels so good. I will be making dinner a he will stand behind me kissing me when we lay and watch a movie he will stare at me he even talks to his wife in front of me it bothers me but I know he loves her. But if he loves her so much what is he doing here with me?
He works away from home a lot so his wife must know!
How do get over him how do I stop this how do I stop my heart from falling in love with a man I know I can't have?
Please help
joypulv
Mar 19, 2013, 03:43 AM
'But if he loves her so much what is he doing here with me?'
Ah, that old question heard over and over. He is with you because he isn't home, that's all, and you are a nice warm body, and he has his cake and his cupcake too. You are the rest stop along the highway of his work route.
'I try my best not to make contact with him but he makes it difficult not to' Baloney. He doesn't have a gun to your head.
'He works away from home a lot so his wife must know! ' That does not follow. There is no logic to that statement. He calls her and probably makes up stories about what he is doing.
You are in a vulnerable position that is making you crave comfort and attention, and it may feel good now but the pain later is going to be horrible. If you can't see that and go cold turkey now, then we can't help you. Being lonely for a while is far better than what this is going to lead to. Plus it's taking time away from all the ways you have to meet a truly available man. Somewhere around the corner is a nice divorced guy, in the same state you are in, still burned, just right for you.
If you were told you have diabetes, would you keep eating sweets? If you were told you have lung cancer, would you keep smoking? If you were told to evacuate for a tornado, would you stay in it's path? BREAK IT OFF NOW.
I forgot one very important part: your kids, good grief. What does it matter that they enjoy him there? They will find out, or he will be gone, one or the other. He will get tired of you or his work will change, or both.
smkanand
Mar 19, 2013, 04:54 AM
Very simple, think about he's cheating his wife. Plus he's taking advantage of you because you are acting fool. He's is enjoying his time with you. That's all. Your going through a divorce so don't make it worse. Get rid of this guy, you will gain nothing from him.
Oliver2011
Mar 19, 2013, 04:57 AM
You can't have him and why would you want him? If he is cheating on this wife, he will cheat on you. You are being used and will be the one that is hurt in the end. If you don't want the pain break it off now while it is still early. Your kids deserve better than this.
Homegirl 50
Mar 19, 2013, 07:13 AM
Put yourself in his wife's place and for goodness sake why is this man around your kids?
He is a cheater and he is doing this because you let him. Makes you wonder who was there before you. And talking to his wife when he's with you, what a jerk. Stop this now, it's a lose lose situation.
talaniman
Mar 19, 2013, 10:12 AM
You are a heart broken junkie, hooked on the dope of false love, and your only way off it, is to stop doing it. Whether you go, or stay its going to be painful, and hurt you and those kids.
There is no easy way out, You suffer being with him, or suffering being without, just do what's right by your kids, and teaching them its okay to have men in and out of your life using you for their own means is definitely the wrong thing to teach them, boy or girl.
Make a decision about which path you choose.
Why does he do this to you? Because you let him.