I have a newborn baby girl who I fathered with a young woman I know, but am not in a relationship with. I have custody of her, and intend to raise her without her birth mothers involvement, which the birthmother has consented to, and she is willing to sign off parental rights. She and I are on very good speaking terms, and I am seeking some help to find the appropriate paperwork or path I need to follow to get on with our separate lives with the birth mother's rights terminated. Since we both are in agreement on this issue is it possible to exclude lawyers and file appropriate papers on our own?

This gets very complicated, since the custody agreements have to be signed by the judge and each state has very special requirements. Please get an attorney or you will find in a few years some flaw and the mother can come back in. Also normally unless there is another partner or spouse that is going to adopt, child support can not be just given up, you may not require it, but there are times the state may hold the right to collect money for the child if any state benefits were ever required.

Is it important to you that the mother never be involved with the child? You say you're on good speaking terms. Why do you want to make sure she is legally going to be apart from the child? She may not want to deal with a child, but over time that could change, and your daughter may really want the chance to know her mom. I hope you both think this through carefully.

Actually it is more important for her not to be involved, that is her decision. She will always have an oppourtunity to see her daughter if she chooses. I am not trying to cut her out of a relationship with her daughter, she recognizes that I am a good father and have the baby's best interest in mind, while she still is growing up and doesn't usually have her own best interests at bay.