I am an ex drug adtic had a bad few months now I feel down all the time and am drinking and taken valium and weed to make it go away

I am going to answer the question you didn't ask.

You need to accept that you are not an ex-addict. Your current drug use shows that you are still using and it isn't helping. That mixture is probably making any depression you have worse. Masking the issues with drugs does not make them go away. It only allows them to grow because they aren't being taken care of.

Look into treatment that will help you get clean and learn better coping skills. Support groups might also help.

Good luck.

You can sweep stuff under the rug but it won't 'go away.' You have been covering your depression with drugs, and still are, not making it go away. When you get help for the depression, you will find that even that is covering something - some pain, some anger, some real feelings about events in your life.

Have you ever attended Narcotics Anonymous? They are a great group, and most towns and cities have a group or two. Some Alcoholic Anonymous groups also accept narcotics problems, and talk about them, too. My AA group, many years ago, accepted both. Please go to a meeting and start talking about all this. Others can be a big help.