We been together for 5 years and live together in my house for 9 months. We currntly live in Boston. She wants me to sell my house which I have only lived in for 9 months, and quit my job, that I been working for 4 years to move to Idaho to live the outdoor lifestyle. I love outdoor New England has it all. But my family friends, job, and home is here.

She has had part time jobs her whole life, and she still doesn't know what she wants to do. I don't see it happening because I see the risk. To throw away a secure job, and perfect home for a lifestyle you may not be able to live.

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Well, that's a recipe for disaster. I certainly wouldn't do that if I were you.

I agree. This economy is bad and could be going to worse shortly. Giving up a secure job you have had for 4 years at this moment is a bad decision. You don't want to put yourself in financial hardship by making decisions on a whim. Plus moving is one of those big life events that impacts lives - sometimes in a very negative way.

Gf wants me to move with her. From our home in boston mass to sun valley Idaho? Is there any nice way to say I won't move?

Yes. Say it like this.

"I won't move."

Yes. Say it like this.

"I won't move."

You took the word right out of my mouth haha thanks for previous response

Explain it to her. You don't sound like you are overly sold on this girl anyway.

I know Idaho well (my mom's from that state) and I grew up in the N.E. area, so I agree to tell her, "I won't move." You can always vacation in Idaho.

It sounds like she has her head in the clouds about wanting to live in a romantic ski resort area with glorious snow-covered mountains and cute bunny hills. Does she even ski? Has she ever been to Idaho?

Explain it to her. You don't sound like you are overly sold on this girl anyways.

I love her but out of college she was ski bum then peace corps. Then moved in with me. When I got out of college I got a job and saved for house and bought one. Just recently she made this decisions. And she fells like I am going to throw all that work away for a lifestyle I don't want. Thhats how ill do it. I don't want that lifestyle. Its expansive where she wants to live so I know I have to work hard and not enjoy the scenery thanks

How did she pay for her ski bumming time?

I love her but out of college she was ski bum then peace corps. Then moved in with me. When i got out of college i got a job and saved for house and bought one. Just recently she made this decisions. And she fells like i am going to throw all that work away for a lifestyle i dont want. Thhats how ill do it. I dont want that lifestyle. Its expansive where she wants to live so i know i have to work hard and not enjoy the scenery thanks

Then you have made your decision. Look - you sound like you are on a path and a pretty good path. So stick with that. You don't want to look back and regret.

Side note - I hate the Patriots!!

I know Idaho well (my mom's from that state) and I grew up in the N.E. area, so I agree to tell her, "I won't move." You can always vacation in Idaho.
She vacationed to sun valley for years for skiing. Her mom recently retired and move to this town.
It sounds like she has her head in the clouds about wanting to live in a romantic ski resort area with glorious snow-covered mountains and cute bunny hills. Does she even ski? Has she ever been to Idaho?
She use to vacation to sun valley and her mom just retired and bought a houes out there. She skis a lot.


Then you have made your decision. Look - you sound like you are on a path and a pretty good path. So stick with that. You don't want to look back and regret.
Dont watch sports so i dont care. Thanks your for input
Side note - I hate the Patriots!!!
Don't watch sport so I don't care. Thanks for the input. It helps a lot.

How does she pay for that? My sis used to ski in Vermont, and it cost her an arm and a leg.

Dont watch sport so i dont care. Thanks for the input. It helps a lot.

No problem and I wish you the best.

How did she pay for her ski bumming time?

She was living is aspen co. So she worked at retail store and ski instructor. And lived with 4 others. That's an expensive town to be in.

She was living is aspen co. So she worked at retail store and ski instructor. And lived with 4 others. Thats an expensive town to be in.
I was there overnight (in a pricy motel) on a vacation to CO. Good grief! She likes the high life, doesn't she.

Been with girlfriend for 5 years: College 2 years, long distance for 2 years, living together for 9 months.

She doesn't like where we live now and wants to move to where her mother lives. I find that life there wouldn't make me happy. We love each other a lot but divided to where we live. What should we do? The distance between the locations is about 1200 miles. We have family where we want to live.

Keep talking until you do decide, or take a lot of vacations and visit family. I doubt I would give up a job for a lifestyle.

It's really hard to make a decision. Good luck.

Having a girlfriend you love and want to please and be happy with is a great way to experiment and explore, but for major changes, I would myself require a very deeper commitment for the future, that offers security, and stability.

You seem to have that, but she does not. I mean sounds great to be able to enjoy family and activities, and live a fun life style, but can you earn enough to build a future that allows that as you get older? If you want the luxury lifestyle of the rich and famous, you better have the bucks to sustain it, after you give up a solid job, and house.

Love don' pay the sky lift operator. And moving in with mommy when you can't pay rent is unacceptable.

Obviously I don't see her plan as viable in the long term but sounds like fun until the bills have to be paid.

After 5 years, the two of you are just getting past the 'I'll do anything for you my dear' stage and your own selves are more evident. This is when two people who aren't tied down by children, jobs, and mortgages often break up. She isn't tied down anyway... you sort of are, so maybe it's just time to go your separate ways. It doesn't mean you don't care for each other.