View Full Version : Do you think my ex girlfriend of 4 years misses me?
H2Pitt54
Dec 15, 2012, 02:05 PM
I dated my ex for 4 and a half years. The first few years were amazing, and then some personal things happened and kind of ruined it. We broke up 4 months ago, and she is already wanting to date a guy.
We kept in contact and met up a few times, but I have chosen to not talk to her at all. It's been 2 weeks (which I know isn't a long time) but it is for a couple that talked everyday for 4 years. We split a few times in the process but only for short periods. She told me she kept pictures of us on her computer and kept our e-mails from when we first started talking. I admit that I do miss her, but I am kind of confused if she misses me or wants me back in the future.
Over time I have gotten a lot better, but she still lingers in my head. She told me she's completely over me, but I don't know if I really believe her. The worst part is, I ended it with her, and I don't regret it because I essentially did it to rebuild our relationship status. But another guy started talking to her.
I recently bought a brand new car, and transferred myself to a new college. Unfortunately she goes to the same school as well. I guess I'm just wondering what is going through her mind. Thanks.
odinn7
Dec 15, 2012, 02:28 PM
She says she's over you and is looking for someone else. Why not believe her?
H2Pitt54
Dec 15, 2012, 02:37 PM
I suppose it's because she is the type of girl to make you feel jealous if she says something like that. I just find it weird she kept our pics and e-mails but has decided to move on. I guess I'm just misunderstanding what is going on.
Wondergirl
Dec 15, 2012, 03:19 PM
What does this mean? "I ended it with her, and I don't regret it because I essentially did it to rebuild our relationship status."
talaniman
Dec 15, 2012, 03:21 PM
You are having regrets and that's very understandable after a break up, but leaving her alone for a while will give you a better perspective on this.
Its hard but it's a start. What gave you the crazy notion that a break up would strengthen a relationship?
H2Pitt54
Dec 15, 2012, 09:55 PM
Well we were fighting a lot during the last few months. It would be a rarity to go a week without fighting about something little. My mind set was to give us a little time away from each other so I could rebuild our relationship. And it in fact worked, until another guy came and grabbed her attention. I started falling hard again for her because of us being apart. I told her that was my plan, and she agreed to it. But then the guy that she said she had a crush on in high school before us started randomly talking to her. I found out that this guy was pretty much using her as a rebound because he himself got out of a 5 year relationship and still loves his ex too. I apologize if some of the text doesn't make sense, but I'm trying to explain as best as possible.
Alty
Dec 15, 2012, 11:22 PM
There's really no way for anyone, other than her, to know how she feels or what she's thinking.
You asked her how she feels, and she told you, but you don't believe her. It's likely that you don't believe her because you don't want it to be true.
Why would she lie to you? If she wanted you back then telling you she's over you, would be counter productive.
Move on, go to no contact, and let her live her life.
H2Pitt54
Dec 15, 2012, 11:43 PM
I have been doing that. I was just curious as to see what other opinions there were out there. I appreciate all of your help. I'm doing a lot better not talking to her, but I figured I'd see what kinds of answers I could get.
joypulv
Dec 16, 2012, 02:47 AM
We can't possibly know what she is thinking. We'd be guessing even more than you are, not being there.
You ended it with her 'so I could rebuild our relationship?' That's strangely one sided. You may have meant WE but you didn't say we. And even if you had said we, you were the one setting the terms of breaking up and rebuilding, still strangely self centered.
It's human nature to turn hurt to anger to no longer caring when someone breaks up with us. That's the process. And it sounds like maybe that's what she's doing.
No one (probably not even she) can predict what's going to happen if the rebound guy from her past pans out or not, or whether any of that will drive her back to you, or whether the two of you will ever get along, regardless of your 'rebuilding' plan. That's life, sorry.
You seem to be looking for concrete answers to very complicated relationship questions. You bought a new car - what does that have to do with anything? You transferred schools and she just happened to do the same, or just happened to be there without your knowledge? Very puzzling. Good luck