Was adopted , Born in a small clinic in the midwest.

I was adopted at birth by two people from the Appalachians, it was hell from day 1.

When I cried I was smacked, my mother said I cried on purpose, trying to get attention. I was an ill baby , allergic to milk and my tummy always hurt , always throwing up. This didn’t sit well with my mother, her remedy was to give me more to what ever I was allergic too.

My earliest memory was her holding me on her lap and restraining me, forcing me to eat, if I fell asleep during my feeding I was rudely shaken awake. I have scars on my face where she has pinched my cheeks to hold food in my mouth so I wouldn’t spit it out.

My toddler years consisted of being thrown out of the crib onto the floor busting out my teeth and giving me two black eyes, my leg was broken because my mom said I fell off the bed, I was always being chased, hit or force-fed.

AS I became older, I was always told I was ugly, and I acted stupid. I was tied up by my ankles to a bed post and stripped of my pants and under garments, my mom then sat across the small of my back so I couldn’t reach around to stop her from beating my butt with a shoe heel, a thick wooden paddle this all the while stuffing my dads tube socks in my mouth so I couldn’t scream. This beating would go on until her fury drained out of her and I was left bleeding through my bruises. Before any type of beating she would walk through the house closing windows so the neighbors wouldn’t hear.

She stood me in a corner naked and flipped me with rubber bands, put my feet in a frying pan on the stove. Made me eat dish soap and whenever I had chapped lips she would put hot pepper sauce on them.

When she was potty training me, she would make me sit on the toilet for hours. During summer vacation she would get me up, feed me breakfast and then make me stand in the corner until it was time to go to bed that night , usually standing 13 hours or more a day.

She beat me ( along with my father) on my female private parts with a paddle or a paint stirrer, and when it was bruised, she would remark….” look , your pee-pee is wearing lipstick.” She then would apply muscle rub to my genitalia. This happened more than once.

I think she was poisoning me, I had sores all over my body, my tongue always had red bumps and my nails had white spots on them. I was always very sick to my stomach, but I was never allowed to rest, I had to stand in that corner very ill. Sickness was a sign of weakness.

She didn’t like it when I had to go to the hospital. She took me out and brought me home. She would wrap me up in bed sheets with a peroxide or alcohol solution with all of those open sores on my body, it hurt so bad! Then she stood me in front of the window air unit wrapped in wet bed sheets, She would make me stand there for hours. I would freeze and shake.

At night when I was in bed, she would come in and scream at me that I wasn't sleeping in my bed correctly and then she would grab me by the hair and throw me to the ground this would happen over and over, it got to where I was afraid to go to sleep. I wasn't allowed to have friends and I couldn’t play with my toys, I either stood in the corner all day ( from time of getting up till time for bed) or sat in the corner of my room.

I was tested at school and they wanted to put me in a gifted class and she told them no. So when I got home after school, she would take away my books and not let me do homework, so I would flunk out. See? She said, you’re not so smart.

She made me clean the bathroom and mirrors with my tongue, she wrapped me up in my dads thermal shirts and tied my hands behind my back like a straight jacket I was often made to eat off the floor like a dog . She also made me eat whole cakes and a bottles of ketchup when I told her I was hungry and wanted a little bit more.

She would make me stand and make faces at myself in the mirror. She would send me to my room to cry and when I stopped she would come in with a belt,extension cord. She was also known to punch me in the stomach. She also made me wear diapers and suck a pacifier when I was 8 years old.
It has been a long time now, is there anything I can do? I still have nightmares and suffer from PTSD. I went through almost 20 some foster homes after this.

I had a horrible life, I was always afraid, afraid to sleep, afraid to speak. And my dad would just go along with it.

I still suffer.

Your post is extreme to say the least. How did all of this go unnoticed? You must have had marks on you, visible to your teacher or others at your school.

How old are you now?

You need closure for all of this abuse? Are your adoptive parents still alive, and where do you live now ?

There are many tests people have to go through before adopting a child, especially a baby. I can't imagine an adoption agency not noticing that these people were mentally unbalanced in some way.

I doubt if there is anything you can do at this point. You say your were legally adopted, but then went through 20 foster homes. So that indicates someone noticed the abuse, reported it and you were removed.

I don't believe you can sue them for being abusive parents. You MIGHT have a case for getting them to pay for your therapy based on the abuse.

Yes, they are.
I spoke to lawyer last year, she said I couldn't do anything about it.
It is getting bad,I always wake up scared and sometimes I just shake for no reason.
It seems to be getting worse as I get older. I paint and crochet and do not take medicine, I try to do things naturally, but the nigtmares are getting worse.

Back in the day, they really didn't do anything. CS did have some photos but they kept putting me back in the home. When I told people they accused me of lying, my mom helped them with that.

You were taken from your adopting parents - at what age, and how did social services find out, and what do you know about that? Were you the only child?

One way to possibly heal would be to try to find your birth mother... although that might not have a happy ending either.

Yes, they are.
I spoke to lawyer last year, she said I couldnt do anything about it.
It is getting bad,I always wake up scared and sometimes I just shake for no reason.
It seems to be getting worse as I get older. I paint and crochet and do not take medicine, I try to do things naturally, but the nigtmares are getting worse.

I would consult other lawyers. I don't know what therapy you are getting, but you need more. I think a creative lawyer MIGHT be able to get them to pay for it. Most attorneys will give an initial free consult so you can shop around.

You MIGHT also have a case against the agency that placed you. IF they did not do due diligence in doing background checks, etc. But it will take a lot of money and research to prove that.

Thank you for your kind emails.
At this point I have no family, just my son.
The adoption was arrainged in such a way I can never find out who my real family was. I was born in 65, the records are closed and not to mention most of what I have found was falsified.
They are horrble people but it seems they live a very charmed life. They are very well off and live in bliss. When I did speak to her she told me to " get over it." The only apology I received was her saying she was sorry she ever adopted me.

Finding out about your bio parents is not part of this. While those records are sealed, what the agency did in deciding who to place you with is not. You should be able to subpoena the records that show how they decided to place you with this family and what was done in terms of determining their fitness. But if those records have been falsified, you will have to prove it. And that is not going to be easy and cheap.

You haven't told us the circumstances about why you were removed from them and placed in the foster system. I think that is a very key piece to this.

I really don't know why I was removed, no one ever told me. I started running away from home and I didn't want to go back. I just fell through the cracks, I was born in Ohio. My last foster parent told me they never even checked on me when she had custody. As far as the adoption process, I was told I was adopted through a lawyer , my dad paid him. That was it.

More disconnect feeling in my little brain... the third in a short month or two.
Appalachians? Kind of unusual description of where someone is from.
Incredible detail of toddler years but not sure when taken from the home and put in foster homes.
Also, for someone with PTSD who crochets and has nightmares, what's with your profile, full of books and mystery and wind in your hair and 'I am a independent thinker, free spirited and always laughing?'
I keep getting slammed for being dubious, but I still think that we are listening to the same person - one in love with a 6 year old stepsister, one unsure of marrying an incestuous woman in remote northeast India, and now this.

However, this is the nature of online 'Help desks' and we are bound to be socked with creative trolls, and it's probably a good test. Sort of like breaking computer security. Keep us on our toes.

I sense a creative writer amongst us.

No troll here.
Believe it or not folks that are abused in their childhood don't always end up being an uneducated dim wit.
I don't have a step sister, I am not ffom India. I am just a lady from the midwest reaching out to folks and this is what I receive. I feel really bad for you. Some people don't have to make up stories , their lives are just a night mare. And if I didn't laugh, I would have gone insane. Don't be a hater. If you don't have any advice then you should probably be quiet. I didn't ask for your projection of your own paranoia.

I don't know what the situation is here.I alos find it unusual that you remember so much of the abuse and so little of what happened to get you out of the house.

But there is very little more that we can do to help you. Your chance of a successful law suit is slim. I've given you some tips on what you might be able to do. Basically you need to find an attorney willing to go for it.

Since there is nothing more we can advise, I'm closing the thread.