Am new at this, never done this before, but I really need MAJOR HELP. Am 20 years old, and am in love with this guy, he is 26. At first, everything was great till I found out what a jerk he is. Its been all most a year we been dating but it feels like its been 5 or more years. I recently found out that he got a 5 year old son back in his country. He is still with the baby's mom but anytime I confront him, he tells me lies. I really don't know what to do. He will flirt with other girls including my own very close friends and my cousins.. he denies when I ask him, but anyway, I guess he doesn't want his people to know about us because we were at a mutual friend's birthday party. It was a blast but suddenly, his friend came up to me and asked me to dance. Am aware they know each other because they speak the same language, but he didn't know me.. he was attracted to me.Later on, he saw my boyfriend and I discussing, he asked for another dance and it was granted. My boyfriend saw us dancing, how we were really close, it was really intense on the floor.. I suddenly felt a connection with the guy.. my boyfriend tried to be jealous or tried to make me jealous but I didn't care because I was all caught up in the guys eyes.. minutes later, he asked of me to my boyfriend and he said, 'AM HIS REALLY GUD FRIEND"..thats what am really confuse about. i don't if he really cares about me,i kept asking myself " why will he say am his friend", and am guessing he is being saying that to everybody. That guy told my boyfriend that he has to get my contact before I disappear, I might be the woman he's been looking for, but my boyfriend never said any thing... I started flirting with him and other.. Weeks later, this guy and I went on a date, I was so into him but I couldn't stop thinking about my baby. This guy is everything I want my baby to be.. we had a great time.. one thing let to another, we ended up at my place.. we had sex, I can't explain it, I felt embarrassed, but still, the sex was amazing, we had a connection.. Right now, I don't know if I should tell my boo, I don't if the guy is going to tell him.. Am confuse, because some girls been calling me, asking me to leave their man ( my boyfriend) alone.. whenever am sad, I think about the other guy, he makes me happy.. Am developing strong feelings for him.. my questions are.. 1) was sleeping with him a mistake? 2) do you think my boyfriend really cares about me? 3) the feelings am developing toward the guy, are they real? I really need the best advice..

1. Yes, sleeping with someone else while you're in a relationship was a mistake. If you stay with your boyfriend, he might never fully trust you, again. If you end up with the new guy, he'll have a hard time trusting you because you cheated with him.

2. Your boyfriend is a liar and cheater. He's clearly hiding your relationship for a reason. The woman telling you to stay away from him clearly has some sort of claim on him. He has a son with someone else, who you say he's still involved with. That adds up to being in a relationship with at least three different women.

Are his feelings for you real? Only he knows. I don't think it matters, though. No matter how real his feelings are, he's already shown himself incapable of being honest and faithful.

3. Are your feelings for the new guy real? Only you know that. However, starting a relationship by cheating with that person is a really bad idea. He's not going to able to trust you. You already cheated on one boyfriend, so he has no reason to trust you won't cheat on him.

Dump your lying, cheating boyfriend. Spend some time single. Figure out why you've stayed with someone who lies to you and hides your relationship. Work on fixing whatever caused you to think you deserved that treatment, or at least allowed it to continue. Then, worry about finding someone to date. Preferably someone you didn't cheat with.