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sairum
Nov 28, 2012, 03:47 AM
Assalamo Alaikum

I am 26 and married for one year. I have read various ahadith and learnt that men should be kind to their wives and would do most to make her happy. I need to know if I am committing a sin by asking my wife not to stay at her parents house. She visits her parents once in a week and insists to stay there every week for one night (She is not pregnant).She used to visit even more in the past. I never have said that she should not meet them but I only ask her not to stay and let me be in command for when to go as I have to see other factors as well. The maximum time she has been away from her parents is 10 days in the past whole year. Its OK for her to stay once in a month but not this often. We live in the same city and mobile and internet facilities are around. Her parents are not sick and they are living with 3 of their kids ( all 24+) We always have argument after she comes back and she accuses me that I consider her a slave by not letting her to stay at their parents. Please let me know if I am exceeding my authorities granted to me by Allah or she is asking too much.

Silver Lining
Dec 11, 2012, 03:00 AM
I am no follower of Islam, neither do I completely know your law. But I am happy that you are trying to make things better instead of making rash decisions.
According to Indian Law, Men and Women are treated as equal, and hence you have no authority over her, what-so-ever. If she does what you like, it is because of love and commitment.

I suggest you talk to her calmly, ask her why she prefers to stay overnight.
Make other plans with her like a late night movie, Dinner, etc. If you earn well, take her to a resort and spend the night there. Tell her you miss her when she stays over every week and that you need more time with her. Also make sure you spend quality time with her.

My hubby and I play scrabble every weekend,, offer to cook for her, make it romantic, get her some flowers and calmly request her not to stay bac,, or even better, take flowers to her parent's place when she is there and ask her to come back home with u... make her feel special and she will come home with you... if she doesn't, why don you stay with her at her parents?