I remarried 8 years ago and my youngest daughter was18 months. Since she's getting older and very involved in school functions /activities, she wants to have my last name. In addition,she gets teased about her name on the birth certificate (Finger). That being said, I would like to hyphenate her name to read "Finger-Best". This keeps her from trying to answer the questions of why is her name different from her moms. Can I just start using the hyphenated name in NC?

Yes.

It will not be her legal name, you can call her Fred if you want to just start doing it, but it will not change school records, will not change the birth certificate and will not be what is on her drivers license.

A legal name change will be needed to legally change name.

And you think Finger-Best, is not going to get more jokes than just Finger??

My son and I have different last names and it's never been a big issue. I just explain that he has his father's last name if it comes up. It hasn't come up in years because it's so common. If Finger remains part of her name, she'll still get teased. With "best" added, she'll get teased worse. Better for her to get a sense of humor about her unusual but memorable name. There are good things about having a memorable name - helps in business tremendously. I would work on helping her come to terms with and value the name she has.

The other disadvantage of a hyphenated name is what does she do when she marries, and has kids? Are her kids going to have the last name of "Finger-Best-Smith-Portwood?" It gets ridiculous.

If her father is totally out of the picture and the name means nothing to her, and your husband adopts her, she could drop Finger entirely and just change her last name to Best. Short of that though, I'd leave it alone.

As noted a person can use any name they want unless there is an intent to defraud.

But I have to agree with the others that extended families are very common nowadays so it should not really be an issue. If other children are going to tease her, using another name is not going to stop it.