He flies into rages, destroys my home, is verbally and emotionally abusive and tonight he was pushing me around and throwing stuff at me.
I have an 8 yr old too who tries to get right in the middle and fix things. I'm afraid he's going to get hurt.
I'm tired of being afraid, tired of walking on egg shells for fear of setting him off. He's on medication but it doesn't stop his rage and hate for me.

I just need help. I can't do this any more.
Where can I go to chat with some one? Is there a support group?

What did the police do when they arrived at your house, after you called them about the assult?

I think you need to tell him when he is not in a rage that as of now you will not put up with any abuse and call 911 on him when it happens again. Tell him you love him and he is old enough to deal with what happens because of his actions. The 8 year old needs to be protected and yourself as well.
It won't be easy I understand that but to be honest getting the police involved may be the wake up call he needs to start working on changing.

Point taken

I think you need to tell him when he is not in a rage that as of now you will not put up with any abuse and call 911 on him when it happens again. Tell him you love him and he is old enough to deal with what happens because of his actions. The 8 year old needs to be protected and yourself as well.
It won't be easy I understand that but to be honest getting the police involved may be the wake up call he needs to start working on changing.

The police are already involved and the Canadian Mental Health Services in our town and court house. He is on meds. He hasn't had a melt down for a while and he's never gotten physical before. Today he is beating himself up and trying to apologize though he says he knows it probably doesn't mean anything. To be honest it doesn't mean a lot, we've been here before. He also threatens to do himself in because he says we would all just be better off without him. I know he needs help and I've always been there for him and tried to get him to the help he needs. This is breaking my heart, I can't make it better. I'm scared for him and worried for my younger son and the effect this is having on him.
I tell him I love him every day, even when he treats me like crap. I love both my boys so much.
I just want to save my family.