My son is getting married and his fiancé just informed me that she wants her mother and myself to wear either an off chapagne or red mother in law suit. First of all, I have red hair and fair skin so neither of these colors will look good on me. In fact, they make me look awful. Secondly, I was going to wear a dress and not one of those mother in law suits. Is it the fiance's choice as to what I should wear? I am not comfortable wearing either.

Usually the fiancé does pick the attire out... or the color. But if your not comfortable just talk to her about it. She should understand, everyone should look their best! You should be able to wear what makes you comfortable.

Its not about what looks good on YOU. Its all about HER wedding day! :)

I don't see why she should dictate what you wear. I would never consider the mother in law to be part of the wedding party (like bride groom page boys bridesmaids etc) You want to look good, quite rightly so, and you should be able to.

To be honest, I never heard of a mother-in-law suit. I would suggest you talk to your son's fiancé and explain that neither off champagne nor red "work" for you. There has to be an option. I know the bride can dictate the bridesmaid's dresses but the mother and prospective mother-in-law? Something complimentary would be appropriate. What is the worst that can happen here? You show up with a nice dress?

I don't see what the harm would be in choosing something that looks good on you as you are the one paying for the outfit you wear.
Yes normally though they do ask for you to color coordinate with the color scheme.
If this is going to upset son and his new wife to be however... it is only just for that one day and then you can donate it to a clothing bank.

I suggest that you tell this young lady with excitement that you intend to go to a nice shop that specializes in bridal attire. Ask her for a swatch of the bridesmaid fabric so you can make sure you do not choose anything that will clash with the bridal party, and let her know that your goal is to fit into her color scheme while also complimenting your personal coloring.

You might thank her eagerly for her helpful suggestions, but let her know you will likely be wearing a dress or gown rather than a suit, but will be sure whatever you select is appropriate for the occasion, venue and the level of formality she has planned.

If she cannot accept that, she will have to get over it. Let her know that you appreciates that this is her day and that she is trying to make everything perfect, but that as your entire family and close friends will all be there, you want to feel confident and attractive at your son's wedding. Ask her not to pass judgement and remind her that you are not a bridesmaid, and it is customary for the mother of the groom to select her own dress, independently.

In our opinion, wedding is a happy event and we all should make it that way. The bride sure can ask whatever she wants, but dictating seems a bit much today. Why don't you all sit down around a nice dinner and negotiate the issue? You will be parts of your family, so try not to make anything last will last in bitter feelings.

Good luck.

Ask her to go shopping for it with you, she will either see that those colors are not right for you and you can pick something together or she will like it anyway and you will make her happy on her wedding .