I am now 61 years old, Chinese (separated with my husband), I have only one daughter who is now 35 years old. When she was 13 years old, I sent her to a boarding school in UK (because she also liked to study abroad), then she graduated in a University and later even had two masters degree, When she was 25, she started working in London for 5 years. During this time, she met a man who is 15 years older than her and she started loving this man, and from that time she started hating me. After few months I found out that this man was her supervisor in her working place, he had been luring her and using her since she started working there, he even asked her to see psychologist and told her she had been abused by her parents when she was a child that's why she is always unhappy. My daughter did it and spent a lot of money going for psychologist and blamed me that I did not make her life happy and I only wanted to control her, give her the things that she doesn't like when she was a child, for example ask her to take scarf because the weather is cold, take the soup because it's good for health, clean the room for her because I am too demanding, etc, etc...

The man does not love her, when he needs her he would call her to come over to his home to sleep with him, and tell her to go away the next day. He told my daughter that he would never marry her, if she doesn't want this kind of relationship she can choose to go anytime. My daughter loves him so much perhaps because he is her first lover, and she always believes one day he will change and marry her, this man is a rich man and highly educated and has a great earning power. Unfortunately he is just using her... All the time they are together my daughter has to pay for herself (going to restaurant, going out for a trip etc.. ), I feel so pity for her. And this man told her there is no 'Love' in this world, when two persons together just because they need each other.

One day I sent my daughter an email telling her she needed to leave this man or it would be too late. She became crazy and got mad on me and said she would never see me again... In order to keep a good relationship with my daughter, I'd rather suffer myself, I did not say a word anymore and let her do whatever she likes. Our relationship hasn't improve, her man told her I am the most stupid woman in the world and she listens to him and hates me more and more...

My daughter is now 35 years old now, she has been with this man for 10 years, they are not working in the same company but they are still together. She keeps hating me even I tried to be friendly to them and invite them for dinner. I can see that this man is controlling her, but she chooses to follow him.

I have no tears on my eyes, my tears are in my heart - sometimes I have to tell myself I have no child so comfort myself, after raising a child for so many years today she treats me like an enemy, whenever she talks to me she intends to hurt me deeply. One time I bought two new coats (from France) for her, she told me she didn't like them neither and she would give them to oxfam. On mother's day she had an appointment with me and grandma for dinner, but then she would call me to say she's not coming because she's tired. She never gives up hurting me, by words and by actions, she just hates me so much.

Is that somebody in this forum can help me or give me some advices what I can do??

Thanks a lot.

Hi, I'm half korean and half European I have blonde hair,blue eyes, in korea you have to treat parents with respect!!
Also try sitting down with her (not in a public place,away from her fiance)
And talk to her calmy try not to get into a fight just express your points of veiw and how you feel about her another thing tery making it up to her by buying a gift(diamond is a women's best freind) or taking her out to dinner.


HOPE THAT HELPS

BYE AND GOOD LUCK HWAITING!!

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