Log in

View Full Version : Can a judge force me to know the sex of the baby if I don't want to know it?


nancy1768
Oct 23, 2012, 06:43 PM
My husband and his family are obsesed with know the baby gender, because they want a girl, and think that if it's a boy is bad. The thing is that they got me into a really stressful situation calling me every day, and my husband is also obsesed he counts every single minute.I think the best for all is to wait until the baby is born, but my husband is telling me that he will take me to court and I want to know if a judge could force me to do it

Fr_Chuck
Oct 23, 2012, 08:36 PM
Explain to your husband the only court he will be in is divorce court if he does not shut up about it. If this is the US, no he can not force you to find out the gender.

ScottGem
Oct 24, 2012, 03:22 AM
On the other hand, he can, in all likelihood, ask your OB/Gyn to tell him. He may even be able to go to court to force the doctor to tell him. This is an iffy situation. Since you are married and he is the presumed father under the law in all US states, I believe a court might grant him the right to know. Doesn't mean you have to be told, and a court might require that you not be told if you so choose.

A judge can't force you to take a medically unnecessary test just to determine gender. However, there are diagnostic tests done as a matter of course (sonograms) by your OB/Gyn that can be used to determine gender.

But do you have the money to pursue this in court?

J_9
Oct 24, 2012, 03:27 AM
He could ask the OB to tell him, however that would fall under HIPAA. Her health information, even in pregnancy, is protected information unless she signed a medical release allowing the doctor to release and or all information to the husband.

ScottGem
Oct 24, 2012, 03:39 AM
He could ask the OB to tell him, however that would fall under HIPAA. Her health information, even in pregnancy, is protected information unless she signed a medical release allowing the doctor to release and or all information to the husband.

But is this HER health info? He would not be asking about her health, but for information about the fetus.

I know this is a fine point and frankly I don't know how a court would rule. My point is as the presumed father, he may have some legal right to know. But she also has a legal right not to know, that I'm sure of. I would also guess that she did sign a release to allow the husband to ask.

J_9
Oct 24, 2012, 04:00 AM
At this point the fetus is part of HER body, so it is still considered her health info. This is information contained in her health file with the OB. Also, if she has not requested to know the gender of the baby, that information would not be found in her file. That information is only logged if the patient requests to find out.

cdad
Oct 24, 2012, 03:08 PM
But is this HER health info? He would not be asking about her health, but for information about the fetus.

I know this is a fine point and frankly I don't know how a court would rule. My point is as the presumed father, he may have some legal right to know. But she also has a legal right not to know, that I'm sure of. I would also guess that she did sign a release to allow the husband to ask.

Roe V Wade. That is how the courts would rule. J is right on. Until birth its not "his" child.

ScottGem
Oct 24, 2012, 04:29 PM
I don't think Roe vs Wade is on point here. This isn't a boyfriend to to force or even stop an abortion, this is a husband, who under the law will be the presumed father, wanting to know the sex of HIS child. But, again, I'm not sure how a court would rule here. Whether a women's right to privacy as defined by Roe vs Wade, overrides a husband's and father's rights to know the sex of the child. As I said, I can't see a court forcing any test just to determine the sex. Nor can I see a court forcing the mother to know. But a court might allow the doctor to inform the father.

Another factor is I would guess that prior to the husband displaying an obsession about this, the wife may have signed a consent form allowing the doctor to discuss this. And would have to consciously recant that consent, if she doesn't want the doctor to reveal gender.

Fr_Chuck
Oct 24, 2012, 05:13 PM
Most courts go with the father of the child having no rights what so ever till the child is born. Thus why they can't file in court for custody, they can not file till the child is born if the mother moves out of state to try and get her to return.

The courts on very very rare occasions have ruled if the father takes her to court for dangerous activity, such as drug use for protection of the child. ** which legally is not a child, just a fetus, with no rights at all.

Alty
Oct 24, 2012, 05:18 PM
One thing to consider here. Determining the sex of the fetus with ultrasound only, is not 100%. Even if the OP agreed to be told the sex, it's not a guarantee that what the ultrasound tech sees (if anything) is for sure the sex of the baby.

Unless the OP has an amniocentesis, which is more reliable when determining gender, the results won't be 100%. I doubt any judge would order an amniocentesis (which does have risks) just for the sake of determining gender, just because the father wants to know.

I have a question. If the father of this child finds out the child is a boy, which is apparently bad, what does knowing it's a boy entail? Will he demand an abortion (which he cannot do unless the mother agrees, because that is her right, and that's not even nearly a grey area). So what happens if the child is a boy?