mumblingskies
Oct 11, 2012, 04:49 PM
So I was asked out on a date with this boy from my hostel. He is a great guy to hang around. We have known each other for 2 weeks or so and we talk a lot. We had a great evening, grabbed some drinks (we were not drunk) and we came home and he kissed me. So we made out for a while ( mind you, we did not go anywhere below the waist) till he insisted on having sex. I was taken aback and so I refused. I said it’s not what I do on first dates. So he was a little shocked and he asked why have I been making out then. Well, for me, it’s not necessary for a making out session to end in sex. Anyway, he showered me with compliments and even stated how he had not asked anyone out on a date for 2 years and was really looking forward to this date. Frankly I still did not think sex was necessary. So we were lying on our bed and he asks if that’s my final decision. I say that I will not have sex. You know what he does? He gets up and walks out of the room! It was our first date and I had no idea that he was attracted to me. Honestly I didn’t even realize it was a date till much later. Anyway the next 2 days he naturally was a little awkward. But we were slowly beginning to talk normally again. But I still had questions at the back of mind so on the 3rd day after the date I insisted we talk. He said he has nothing to talk about. But I said I did.
So the next day he came over and I asked him why he walked out on me? Was it my refusal to sex? He said it was not that, it’s just that he was surprised that I took it to the next base after kissing and it’s weird that I would take the trouble to do that especially since I am not sleeping with him. I told him, making out and sex always have a line in between, no matter what. This boy is younger than me so he said he was upset cause I mentioned the age gap. I thought he had a point so I apologized. So I asked him what he feels for me, and what was he thinking before the date ( cause he mentioned being very attracted to me). He said he did not know how to answer that. All right, I asked if things are fine now between us? Do I have to think twice to knock on his door and ask him for company? He said…maybe immediately it’s a little difficult for him. He needs time. He insisted we sleep it off and move on. Talk normally. Take some time. I told him that I would like things to get better with time. He insisted that he had a great time that evening except the end of course. So now we have been talking again, he starts conversations. It’s a lot better. It’s going to be a week since the date this Friday. We don’t talk about the first date.
There are two possibilities:
1- he thinks I have been a colossal waste of time and effort
2- he still thinks about me
I wonder which of the above is true? For him was it just a one night stand gone wrong or was he thinking of taking it forward?
Did I go wrong somewhere, because I feel sex is nonsense unless both the partners are comfortable…What do I do next? I do like being around him, I am attracted to him. I was thinking maybe some time mid week I will try to suggest to him that we hang out together, maybe catch a movie or grab some beer over the weekend? Will it be the right thing to do? Or will that make me easy? I don’t want anything other than to chill out with him, get to know him and see where it heads. I would like to give this a try. So what so I do? Or do I wait for him to make a move? HELP!! I don’t know what to do!
So the next day he came over and I asked him why he walked out on me? Was it my refusal to sex? He said it was not that, it’s just that he was surprised that I took it to the next base after kissing and it’s weird that I would take the trouble to do that especially since I am not sleeping with him. I told him, making out and sex always have a line in between, no matter what. This boy is younger than me so he said he was upset cause I mentioned the age gap. I thought he had a point so I apologized. So I asked him what he feels for me, and what was he thinking before the date ( cause he mentioned being very attracted to me). He said he did not know how to answer that. All right, I asked if things are fine now between us? Do I have to think twice to knock on his door and ask him for company? He said…maybe immediately it’s a little difficult for him. He needs time. He insisted we sleep it off and move on. Talk normally. Take some time. I told him that I would like things to get better with time. He insisted that he had a great time that evening except the end of course. So now we have been talking again, he starts conversations. It’s a lot better. It’s going to be a week since the date this Friday. We don’t talk about the first date.
There are two possibilities:
1- he thinks I have been a colossal waste of time and effort
2- he still thinks about me
I wonder which of the above is true? For him was it just a one night stand gone wrong or was he thinking of taking it forward?
Did I go wrong somewhere, because I feel sex is nonsense unless both the partners are comfortable…What do I do next? I do like being around him, I am attracted to him. I was thinking maybe some time mid week I will try to suggest to him that we hang out together, maybe catch a movie or grab some beer over the weekend? Will it be the right thing to do? Or will that make me easy? I don’t want anything other than to chill out with him, get to know him and see where it heads. I would like to give this a try. So what so I do? Or do I wait for him to make a move? HELP!! I don’t know what to do!