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nazcas
Oct 8, 2012, 09:12 AM
This is a really long story I got married for the second time 2 years ago.I waited 5 years before I even thought of marriage. Anyway I married a man who has a daughter from a previous marriage his first wife died so my husbands mother raised her. So when we got married the arrangement was we would aall live together for the sake of his daughter I was married a month and I found out I was pregnant. My mil made my life a living hell I ended up in hospital 6 times because of her behaviour she would scream and shout at me in front of my step daughter all the time and I was brought up to respect my elders she would blame me for everything that went wrong if my husband watched TV in another room she would say its because I've upset him in some way. She has gone as far as keeping my step daughter from my husband and I she doesn't allow her to do anything with us she is rude and I've spent so many days crying alone because I didn't know what to do.after I gave birth to my daughter I asked if we could get our own place promises were made it never happened she insults me about how I see to my child she is always telling me the way I do things is wrong she says she knows my baby better than I do. I can't take it anymore my husband says she is like that she will never change so I should just ignore her but I can't my baby and I are basically confined to our room because I try to avoid her please help I feel like my only option is taking my child and leaving thing is my husband is a good its his mother that's the problem

b4m2012
Oct 8, 2012, 09:47 AM
I would explain to your husband that he married you. That means he's not supposed to have that same bond to his mother, you're the main woman in his life, not her. That doesn't mean he can't respect his mother, he can still do that, but he is disrespecting YOU, his wife, in order to please his mother, and that is unacceptable in a marriage. If he refuses to listen, tell him that you will be leaving, because it is harming both you and your child emotionally to stay in that atmosphere and situation with his mother. If he can't understand and respect your wishes, then he's not right for you, and you need to think about your child and your health, not his ignorance.

joypulv
Oct 8, 2012, 09:48 AM
What country?

I wish I could just say 'Stand up to her.' I know it isn't that easy. I had a hard enough time standing up to my own Holy Terror of a mother.
Plan a speech, and tell her she isn't to interrupt, and give it, calmly and firmly. Set some rules and write them down. Tell your husband you may divorce him if he won't find you a new place without her. Tell her too.
I don't know why you 'ended up in the hospital 6 times' because of her, but it's time to act and do it NOW. You have support here, but also make sure you have support from family and friends. You need to be able to carry out any promises, or it will just get worse.

nazcas
Oct 8, 2012, 10:39 AM
The reason I ended up in hospital 6 times is because of all the stress she put me through I went into premature labour 4 times and at 26 weeks I started Hemorrhage I eventually had my baby girl at 35 weeks

Homegirl 50
Oct 8, 2012, 04:14 PM
Well you need to talk to your husband. His loyalty should be to you.
Was he this controlled by his mother before he married you?
Have a talk with him and your mother in law and have a plan in case you need to leave this marriage. You have your daughter to think about.