View Full Version : Victim of cyberbullying
forreal
Mar 10, 2007, 10:32 AM
What's everyone opinion on online cyberharrasment,cyberstalking and cyber bulling.I was a victim of cyberharrasment,bullying and stalking on 2 site loveshack and enotalone because I was a virgin and spoke about it. The moderator did nothing to my cyberharrassor but I was victimize . I even had a moderator say he didn't like me posting about virginity. I think it's time cybercriminal be stop but how.
shygrneyzs
Mar 10, 2007, 11:08 AM
There is a group called CyberAngels that deals specifically with cyber stalking and related issues. Their website is: CyberAngels (http://www.cyberangels.org/)
Also see The National Center for Victims of Crime: The National Center for Victims of Crime - Library/Document Viewer (http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/main.aspx?dbName=DocumentViewer&DocumentID=32458)
Here is a resource that give the laws regarding cyberstalking: List of Cyberstalking Laws (http://www.haltabuse.org/resources/laws/index.shtml)
And the last one I will post here is the Cyber 911 Help site: Internet Safety: Cyber911 Emergency - Cyberstalking and Harassment (http://www.wiredsafety.org/cyberstalking_harassment/index.html)
You can report, should report, cases of cyberstalking and harassment. It is a threat not to be taken lightly and there are laws that do protect the victims and punish the perpetrtors.
Good luck to you.
forreal
Mar 10, 2007, 11:42 AM
Thank you, I'm scared and don't know what to do.I don't know if I should speak up or keep silent.The moderator on both boards keep giving me violation for speaking out.
shygrneyzs
Mar 10, 2007, 11:44 AM
Report the moderators! Report them to the FCC or the other cyberstalking agencies that take the complaints. Have everything written down - where you are chatting, the moderators names, examples of what is being said to you, etc. REPORT them!
Also, if you are being cyberbullied there - what in the world are you still doing on those sites? Get out! Stay away!
forreal
Mar 10, 2007, 12:38 PM
I don't know if my cyberharrasment on enotalone or loveshack is consider a serous cybercrime.People harass me because I talk about virginity and the moderater give me a wrongful violation.I'm being viticmize and no moderator from enotalone or loveshack wants to help me.
NeedKarma
Mar 10, 2007, 12:40 PM
Why not just leave those sites and join new sites that are more amenable to your cause?
forreal
Mar 10, 2007, 01:08 PM
I just got an email from enotalone forum admin He just thumb his nose at my complain and told me in a nut shell go ahead and inform online authurities because he's not afraid.
I will not post on a board where the forum admin and moderater support cyberharrasser/bullies or stalker on their site. I was wrongful violated and harrass for being a virgin and talking about virginity on enotalone. I can not support a group that harassed virgin and their views.I do not want phsycial harm to come to my body.I'm am speakng out now because if anything happens to me.I want a record.This might be pity to some people (rude comment on a messageboard) but I'm scared because I don't trust anybody from enotalone or what they will do to me.
tinsign
Mar 10, 2007, 01:17 PM
You don't respond it don't matter what you read.. save all e-mails.. copy and paste all harassment , abuse, and insults to you e-mail box folder KEEP THEM SAFE AND ALSO PRINT THEM OUT... DO STATE ONLY THIS stop harassments.. that is all you say. I have learned you must at least say that but not to fall for the bait.
If that administration of said site cannot as they claim stop the attacker then you can legally take further actions.
forreal
Mar 10, 2007, 01:29 PM
I'm scared to take this to the next level because I'm not use to reporting crimes. I'll just suffer in silent and hope everything goes away.
NeedKarma
Mar 10, 2007, 01:29 PM
How can someone form an internet message board cause you physical harm? Have you given out your full home address there?
This is not like the workplace or school, this is the internet, if you don't like a site then leave and go to a different site. BTW you most likely have no legal recourse in this matter.
forreal
Mar 10, 2007, 05:28 PM
The internet is full of private information and a cyberbully/harrasser/stalker can find out anything if they wanted too.I've heard horror stories about cyberstalker stealing private information.I know I have no legal, legal matter here until someone personally harm me and my cyberharrassor know that but I'm still going to put everything on record.It's time people take all types of cybercrime on the internet seriously.
Thank you everybody,I've decide to make a report.I know my report will go unheard because no bodily harm was done to me but least I have my complain on record and now love shack and enotalone is on record for supporting cybercriminal.
shygrneyzs
Mar 10, 2007, 06:09 PM
Part of the problem is that people give up way toooo much information online, thinking that it is somehow anonymous and private and we trust too darn much. We drop defenses, unwittingly give out the information they are asking for - and the cyberstalker knows how to ask. They do it almost for a living.
Personal harm does not mean physical harm - I hope you understand that. Harm is seen in a threat, harassment, cruel and degrading remarks, insinuations, remarks like "I know where you live and ....", any kind of bullying technique that makes you scared, makes you feel like you HAVE to comply. You do not have to comply. You can shut that computer off and no one is coming through the computer to get you. The people who act like they have all the power can only act that way if you are giving them that power. They rely on the victim, which is you, being scared of them. Take back your own power.
You do not have to sit there and listen to anyone harassing you. There is no law that says you have to stay in that chat room, on that blog, in whatever venue you are in, when this is going on. Get smart and protect yourself. Report those who are verbally and emotionally abusive.
I hope you never ever gave out your real name, address, phone number, family information, name of school or friends, if you play a team sport, ANYTHING that can be used to identify you and locate you.
If you need any further information, this is the FCC cyber crime web site. Fraud & Cybercrime (http://www.williamaford.com/Fraud&Cybercrime.php)
If you need any further information on definitions, please see the following legal site for internet crime: Internet Crime: Encyclopedia of Everyday Law (http://law.enotes.com/everyday-law-encyclopedia/internet-crime)
It cannot be said loud enough or often enough - knowledge is power. You do not deserve anyone cyberstalking you. Also beware of your own behaviors and you should do well.
Take care. If you ever have any questions about this, please contact me. I wouild be more than willing to help if I can.
forreal
Mar 10, 2007, 06:17 PM
Thank you.I'm not a member of love shack anymore because the moderator support cyberharrasment and enotalone .I feel the same way.I really want to educate people about message board cybercrime.The only option a cybercrime survivior has is to leave a message board,this is not fair?I want my cyberharrassor ban or place on violation too if I have to leave a forum because of cyber crime.
bl7045
Mar 12, 2007, 05:33 PM
I know you'd kind of give in but just change your profile name.
ScottGem
Mar 12, 2007, 05:47 PM
I have a problem with this whole thread. I've been a victim of cyber bullying, harassment, and stalking in the past. I've been threatened and had my personal info posted publicly. In other words, I've suffered more than you seem to have.
My problem is while you may be a victim here, you are the one making yourself a victim. Sites like you refer to (just like this one) are owned by people. These people have a right to run their sites anyway they want to as long as they don't break the law. And nothing I've heard from you sounds like laws being broken. If you go into someone's home and they are mean or rude to you, what do you do? You leave! They are entitled to be rude, mean, boorish, etc. in their own homes. And if they own the site is their backyard, their playground.
Cyber bullying and harassment are not illegal, unless threats of physical violence are made. Even then, its borderline. Cyber stalking is another issue, but I don't see where that happened.
So what should you do in a situation like this? Well first, you need to read the terms of service listed for the site to see if what was happening breaks their rules. If it does, you report it to the site operators. If they don't do anything about or react as you have described, then the answer is simple, you leave the site and stop using it. Don't bother reporting anything because there is nothing to be done. Go fnd a more reputable site where the moderators really care about people and don't allow such actions.
As for your statements about info being available, its true a lot of info is available, but its just not as easy as you think to get at it. If you gave nothing more than a screen name, or a general location, then its highly unlikely anyone will find out more about you.
Don't get me wrong, I don't support or condone these actions. But I've been hanging out on boards and chat rooms like this for over 20 years. I've seen these situations many times. There is really nothing you can do but leave the site.
forreal
Mar 12, 2007, 06:43 PM
ScottGem,
Your post is very interesting because most times when a crime happens to a woman(rape,harassment,stalking,bullying),The woman is always too blame.Well, I'm not going to go that route because I was cyberharassed,bullied and stalked on both of these 2 forums. Online people know unless a victim of cybercrime is physically harm offline nothing can be seriuos done but all victim of cybercrimes should report these crimes anyway to the proper people/authorities. We need to stop keeping our stories silent just because people don't take verbal crime seriously until rape or murder happens.
I can move on but I won't forget that enotalone and loveshack are protecting cyberharasser and punishing cybercrime victims for speaking out
ScottGem
Mar 13, 2007, 05:48 AM
I think you misunderstood me. I have no doubt that you were harassed and bullied (though I still see no evidence of stalking). Nor do I think you were to blame for the initial attacks. But the scenario goes like this:
1) Post your feelings or thoughts on an issue
2) Get attacked, harassed and bullied for doing so
3) Complain to the site operators about the actions
The next step depends on the results of the last step. If the site operators take corrective action then you are fine. However, if they don't, you have two choices. You can either fight back by defending yourself and your views. Or you can simply leave the site and go someplace where the operators don't permit that type of behavior. To continue to use the site and open yourself for more harassment is allowing yourself to be victimized.
One of my problems here is you talk about crime where no crime exists. Again its not against the law to be rude and crude. The ONLY proper authorities to report what it appears to have happened to you is the site operators. If they won't do anything, then you move on. Of course, they are allowing their friends to abuse others. But there is no authority or law that prevents them from doing so. That's what I think you don't understand.
forreal
Mar 13, 2007, 04:09 PM
My main goal right now is to eduated moderator/forum admin on cyberbullies/stalker/harasser. I've move on but someone needs to educate online people about this cybercrimes.
This is what moderator need to know about cyberbullies/harassers on messageboards:
1. The harasser may post comments intended to cause distress to the victim, or make them the subject of harassment by others.
2. Often the cyberharassment victim is merely in the wrong place at the wrong time, or has made a comment or expressed an opinion that the cyberharasser dislikes
3. Live chat harassment or "flaming" (online verbal abuse).
4. Flaming (where insults and verbal attacks are traded online) can often lead to cyberstalking and harassment. Flaming can get out of control quickly and often escalates into serious threats, offline
5. Cyberstalkers or harassers frequently follow their victims into chat rooms and onto discussion boards, posting lies and hateful messages, or passing misinformation about the victim.
ScottGem
Mar 13, 2007, 07:16 PM
Umm while that is a laudable goal this site has a great group of moderators. We are all pretty well experienced with BBS systems and this is one of the best managed sites I've ever been involved with. If anything this site tends to err on the side of preventing anything that smacks of harassment.
You are preaching to the choir here. I would also be surprised if anyone running a site that involves boards and/or live chats is not familiar with what you have described. This may be new to you, but its old hat to most of us.
Parajr
Mar 13, 2007, 07:19 PM
You needkarma. Just don't visit the sites. Visit new ones or sites that promote your type.
forreal
Mar 13, 2007, 07:37 PM
Scott,
Can you educate other forum moderators?:(
ScottGem
Mar 14, 2007, 05:19 AM
Scott,
Can you educate other forum moderators?:(
I don't think any of the mods here (or any any of the sites I frequent) need to be educated. As I said, I don't think anyone who operates a site is going to be totally unaware of this phenomenon. After all its been around for decades.
Before you join or participate in a site, check out their Terms of Service. If they don't have one, that's not a good sign. People need to be aware that a WEB site is NOT a fully public area. WEB sites are owned by individuals and companies. The site owner has the right to operate the site in any way they see fit as long as no illegal acts are committed.
forreal
Mar 14, 2007, 11:26 AM
Scott,
I'm not talking about this forum.I wish you or someone could go to other online messageboard and be a teacher on cyber bullying.
I just wanted to share this information to everyone and I hope more people enforce this new law but enforcing cybercrime takes patience and time.
"Writing annoying, anonymous online posts or e-mails could land you in jail for as long as two years. That's according to the Violence Against Women and Department of Justice Reauthorization Act of 2005, which was signed into law last week."
According to a section of the act, anyone who uses the Internet anonymously "with intent to annoy, abuse, threaten, or harass another person" can be tried for violating federal telecommunications law and face fines or jail.
Curlyben
Mar 14, 2007, 11:46 AM
We seem to be missing the WHOLE picture here.
I just got an email from enotalone forum admin He just thumb his nose at my complain and told me in a nut shell go ahead and inform online authurities because he's not afraid.
Now ALL mods and admins I have ever "met" wouldn't just respond in this manner unless there was more to a given situation.
So we've heard you're side of this story and that you where harressed and stalked, but without the entire picture it is very difficult to draw any concrete conclusons as to their, the other mods/admins, actions.
I have help to have a number of extremely unsavory characters removed from sites for similar activities, and I still do.
Now this kind of activity WILL NOT be tolerated here.
If I ever hear of it, I'll deal with it swiftly and finally as will the other mods/admins of AMHD.
ScottGem
Mar 14, 2007, 11:56 AM
Scott,
I'm not talking about this forum.I wish you or someone could go to other online messageboard and be a teacher on cyber bullying.
I just wanted to share this infromation to everyone and i hope more people enforce this new law but enforcing cybercrime takes patience and time.
"Writing annoying, anonymous online posts or e-mails could land you in jail for as long as two years. That's according to the Violence Against Women and Department of Justice Reauthorization Act of 2005, which was signed into law last week."
According to a section of the act, anyone who uses the Internet anonymously "with intent to annoy, abuse, threaten, or harass another person" can be tried for violating federal telecommunications law and face fines or jail.
First, I barely have the time to keep up my Q&A activities so I'm not going to be able to carry on a campaign against this.
Second, I do thank you for bringing that law to my attention. Though, like many laws I doubt if we will ever see it enforced. There are several problems with it.
1) It applies only to US citizens
2) It can be enforced only when the actions occur on a US based site or ISP or if the site operator is willing to cooperate with US law enforcement.
3) No federal prosecutor is going to waste their time prosecuting a violation of this.
To prosecute they would have to subpeona the records of site to determine the IP of the perpetrator. Then they would have to subpeona the records of the ISP that issued the IP to identify the real person that used it. If either the site and/or the ISP is outside the US then they have no power to get that ID.
The only real impact this might have is it might force operators of US sites to tighten their TOS and take more notice of complaints least they be held liable under this statute.
forreal
Mar 14, 2007, 03:54 PM
Scott,
We already have one man going to jail under this new law so everybody beware.The victim said it took a long time to get to the finish line but it was worth the trouble.
forreal
Mar 14, 2007, 04:04 PM
Curlyben,
I understand you need to hear the other side but it still doesn't change the fact that I was cyber harrass on 2 messageboard and I never got any moderator support.
I want people to know that these 2 boards (not askmehelpdesk) support cyberharrassment and if you speak out.The forum will give you wrongful violation and ban you. I want people to know about that new 2005 cyber law.
NeedKarma
Mar 14, 2007, 05:02 PM
Dude, you went to dating message boards and talked about your pride in your virginity, what did you expect? Are you aware that most people are there to hook up for sex eventually? That's like going to Bill O'Reilly's board and telling how liberal you are. If you go somewhere and post against the ideology of that board then I would expect you'd get some negative responses.
forreal
Mar 14, 2007, 10:37 PM
Needkarma,
Why can't virgins be part of a dating or relationship advice board and I didn't know virgins couldn't talk about dating,relationship and sex.
The 2 forums I'm talking about are not a dating messageboard but a relationship advice forum.This isn't liberal vs conservatives.
Needkarma if what you're saying is true then I think those 2 messageboard need to say" no virgins on this forum"
ScottGem
Mar 15, 2007, 06:09 AM
needkarma,
Why can't virgins be part of a dating or relationship advice board and I didn't know virgins couldn't talk about dating,relationship and sex.
The 2 forums i'm talking about are not a dating messageboard but a relationship advice forum.This isn't liberal vs conservatives.
needkarma if what you're saying is true then i think those 2 messageboard need to say" no virgins on this forum"
I think you miss the point. Would you log onto Al Jazeera and start talking about Christianity? If you did, would you be surprised that you are flamed? Would you log onto a site for victims of the Holocaust and deny it happened and then be surprised you get harassed? While these are extreme examples, you have to show some sense about what you talk about. Look at the terms of service for this site and what it says about not allowing illegal activities. Then look at threads like this one:
https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/video-games/how-do-play-runescape-school-41123.html#post196325
And see the reaction.
I don't know the sites you had a bad experience with. I don't know what you said that caused the reaction you got. So I can't say whether it was deserved or not. But one has to use some sense when they post on these sites.
You cite someone who has been prosecuted under this law. Can you provide more details?
forreal
Mar 15, 2007, 06:27 PM
I guess we're going to have to agree to disagree on this topic but before I go.I don't mind nonvirgins disagreeing with the virginity issue but to harass/bully/stalk virgins online.It's a cybercrime. And you don't have to harass/bully/stalk a person to get your point across.
ScottGem
Mar 16, 2007, 04:08 AM
I guess we're going to have to agree to disagree on this topic but before i go.I don't mind nonvirgins disagreeing with the virginity issue but to harass/bully/stalk virgins online.It's a cybercrime. and you don't have to harass/bully/stalk a person to get your point across.
First, lets get this stalking issue out of the way. Did anyone follow you to different sites? Even different boards on the same site to posts responses? If they did not follow you a different site, then there is no issue of cyberstalking.
Second, Flaming is a fact of life on the Net. It has been one from almost the very beginning. No one has ever found a way to stop it. The anonymity of the Net spurs people to do things they might not do in the "real" world. For flaming to approach the level of cybercrime would In my opinion take a long and concerted campaign of harassment. Before I would ever think of reporting such to law enforcement, it would have to include threats that go beyond cyberspace.
What I suspect happened to you was more flaming then real bullying and harassment. That's not to condone it or minimize it. But its really a matter of realizing that the jerks who flamed you are just that, jerks and really not worth your time to worry about.
forreal
Mar 19, 2007, 06:37 PM
Scott
This is why I'm taking what happen to me(cyberharassment/bullying/stalking) seriuosly on enotalone.I got a violation from enotalone today for posting on this board.Hmmm, I see a member(s) on enotalone is following my every move AGAIN on another messageboard.Why?? I didn't know what I say or do on another board is enotalone mods business and I hope people take what happen to me seriuosly because cybercrimes is no joke.I don't think what some moderators/members on enotalone is doing is funny but because no bodily harm has come to my body. The law will be slow to respond to this cybercase.This is the reason why I'm trying to speak out on cyberharassment on messageboard
worthbeads
Mar 19, 2007, 07:12 PM
In my opinion (no offense to anyone), cyberbullying should definitely not be taken as seriously as any other harassment. It is your choice to turn on the computer and go to these sites. If you don't like the harassment, turn the computer off. TV is the same way. You can decide to listen and watch some crap on the TV or you can just turn it off. Of course, if a small child went to one of these sites, it's not their fault. They are completely innocent victims. But in that case, where is the parental guidance?
Megg
Mar 19, 2007, 07:16 PM
Worth I agree, however, AND I mean however, IF someone is cyberstalking you and asking werid question's or anything out of the ordinary. Do not talk to them anymore. Tell you parent's or someone you can trust to care. Go to the angel's site like someone mentioned. ALSO remember it is sooooo important to speak freely. In America we have freedom of speech. If your proud of being a virgin ( you should be proud) then don't let people try to make you feel werid for being one. Speak your mind. This day in age we need more people to voice their opinion's!
ScottGem
Mar 20, 2007, 05:24 AM
ALSO remember it is sooooo important to speak freely. In America we have freedom of speech.
Umm what makes you think the freedom of speech applies here? You will find no stauncher advocate of freedom of speech than myself, but it doesn't apply here. Before you involke the First Amendment please make sure you understand what it says and means.
I got a violation from enotalone today for posting on this board.Hmmm, i see a member(s) on enotalone is following my every move AGAIN on another messageboard.
Excuse me? You got a violation from enotalone TODAY? For posting on AMHD?
Why are you still posting there? We have told you to stop. If you haven't been posting and just got an e-mail, what do you expect. You have bad mouthed them on at least one other site. Did you think they wouldn't find out? Did you think they wouldn't retaliate? If I was a site owner I would regularly check to see if my site was being mentioned on other sites. Its not hard to do.
What do you care if they issue you a violation? They have already shown they play favorites. If you aren't going back there (and you shouldn't) then what does it matter?
RubyPitbull
Mar 20, 2007, 12:35 PM
What's everyone opinion on online cyberharrasment,cyberstalking and cyber bulling. It is a terrible thing. Very distressful for the person being stalked.
I was a victim of cyberharrasment,bullying and stalking on 2 site loveshack and enotalone because i was a virgin and spoke about it. The moderator did nothing to my cyberharrassor but i was victimize. I even had a moderator say he didn't like me posting about virginity. I have seen the web site called enotalone. I see many people posting about the fact that they are a virgin. The administration seems to allow these posts. :confused:
I think it's time cybercriminal be stop but how. Yes, cybercrime should be stopped. Laws need to be created and put in place. Please visit this link for info on cyberstalking and cybercrimes. There are definitions in place and you can file a report.
Internet Safety: Cyber911 Emergency - Cyberstalking and Harassment (http://www.wiredsafety.org/cyberstalking_harassment/index.html)
Good Luck!
forreal
Mar 20, 2007, 03:52 PM
Ruby,
Virgins can post on enotalone but post about virginity and some members might harass you.
RubyPitbull
Mar 20, 2007, 03:59 PM
I saw postings and animated discussions about both being a virgin, and virginity. I didn't see anyone harassing someone about virginity. Sorry. If you want to give me the link, I will look at it.
forreal
Mar 20, 2007, 04:12 PM
Scott,
There is still an elephant in the room,Enotalone admin/moderator need to stop following people to other message board and focus on making sure cyberharrassment on their board is not a problem.The mods on that board can hand out violuation to people who complain about harassment all they want but the truth is we were harass.
Scott, I was checking my pm and not posting on that board.I do not want to post on a board that support cyberharassment and silent people who speak out on this seriuos issue.
gazelleintense
May 6, 2007, 03:10 PM
Nothing wrong with being a virgin. Some people can just be jerks. In person and online.
I was on a site and got harassed singled out for no reason by the sites admin... I put up with it a few weeks and got stressed out and nearly sick over it... then I wised up and decided to avoid the site. Problem solved.
dreamguy
Jul 8, 2007, 09:58 PM
There is a group called CyberAngels that deals specifically with cyber stalking and related issues. Their website is: CyberAngels (http://www.cyberangels.org/)
Also see The National Center for Victims of Crime: The National Center for Victims of Crime - Library/Document Viewer (http://www.ncvc.org/ncvc/main.aspx?dbName=DocumentViewer&DocumentID=32458)
Here is a resource that give the laws regarding cyberstalking: List of Cyberstalking Laws (http://www.haltabuse.org/resources/laws/index.shtml)
And the last one I will post here is the Cyber 911 Help site: Internet Safety: Cyber911 Emergency - Cyberstalking and Harassment (http://www.wiredsafety.org/cyberstalking_harassment/index.html)
You can report, should report, cases of cyberstalking and harassment. It is a threat not to be taken lightly and there are laws that do protect the victims and punish the perpetrtors.
Good luck to you.
Does Chris Hanson from dateline interview perpitraitors of cyber bullying and expose them on national TV?
You all know Chris Hanson right? He's a correspondent with dateline NBC. He is on "to catch a predator". He interviews adults who use the internet to meet teens for sex.
But I don't know if he investigates other types of cyber crime.