Ok here goes. In my
Past, I've had ZERO trouble climaxing. I've been divorced for two years and for some reason, in all my relationships I haven't been able to let go. The sexy thoughts, things I want to do to my current guy are there, there's a DEFINITE attraction! I'm just feeling shy(for lack of a better word) or inhibited? This is a new relationship as well. Our first time was a week ago. He's understanding to a point but really really wants to please which adds to my anxiety. I already have anxiety but I'm off meds and have been doing well except for intimate moments and feeling secure in new relationships. My partner is good at reassuring but I need to just enjoy our time. But I need for him to understand its not the destination, but the journey... please help. I can't let go.. I know we'd have mind-blowing sex..

In a new relationship, who does he know what to do to please you ? What works for one women does not another, so are you walking him though your needs ?

Next how new is this ? Is it perhaps too early in a relationship for sex ?

Thanks for your reply! It is very early but we've known each other 20 years. But we've only been dating a few weeks. I do need to walk him through things u are right.


In a new relationship, who does he know what to do to please you ? What works for one women does not another, so are you walking him though your needs ?

Next how new is this ? Is it perhaps too early in a relationship for sex ?

I think you have the right idea but also a case where you need to take your own advice. It is about the journey and not the destination.

When you were having the good sex, were you on your meds?

The other thing that you might know but not realization is that you're probably feeling a lot of rejection due to your divorce. You feeling like you were weighted, measured, and found wanting. You're afraid that all your new loves will see this deficiency and reject you as well. Not knowing the outs of the end of your relationship I cannot say for certain but even if you were the one that initiated the divorce there is a sense of failure that comes when this happens. You tried once, it didn't work so you're a little cautious when you enter a relationship or deal with a new partner.

Unfortunately, if this is the case, it is something you need to get over. You need to understand what is past is past, and that the person you're with isn't going to hurt you. You can open up without being concerned about anything harming you.

That is my take. I am not sure that it is correct.