View Full Version : My boyfriend likes transsexual porn
rasputia
Sep 25, 2012, 03:59 AM
I am a gay man. My boyfriend sometimes performs solo on a sex site. We have been together for 1 year. He claims to be bisexual. Recently I found out he watches a lot of transexual porn. SHould I be offended because I never see him watching gay porn and rarely str8 porn.
joypulv
Sep 25, 2012, 05:19 AM
No. What are your thoughts about being offended?
I would guess that well over 90% of the world has fantasies about people far different from the person they are with, whether it's something common like a movie star to something very unusual. It doesn't mean your relationship isn't full of love.
rasputia
Sep 25, 2012, 06:04 AM
Thank you so much for your response. I am a hopeless romantic and always hope that I would be the man of my man's dreams. Maybe I am a little scared that his fantasies grow and he wants to act on them... he hasn't struck me as the unfaithful type... any thoughts?
rasputia
Sep 25, 2012, 06:32 AM
Should I be worried that he chats with transexuals online?
joypulv
Sep 25, 2012, 06:45 AM
Only you can answer questions about the odds of him moving past the fantasy stage and into real life action. I suppose that online chat falls in a gray area. A lot depends on how anonymous he remains. You say he doesn't seem to be the 'unfaithful' type. If you start openly fretting around him about this before the fact, I guarantee that you will make it happen.
Don't forget that one big word in any relationship: communication. Tell him your fears in a nice and non-confrontational way and ask him how he feels.
rasputia
Sep 25, 2012, 07:15 AM
Sorry for all the questions. Well, he is a performer in a sex site( stripping,etc)... I always see a lot of ts interested in him... he encourages it but never to the point of arranging meetings
joypulv
Sep 25, 2012, 07:35 AM
Ask as many Qs as you want... I didn't mean fretting here; I meant around him.
Have you ever been attracted to other men but wouldn't touch them with a 10 foot pole, because they were too much trouble, drama, problems, differences? Let him have his fun. If he were hiding all this from you, then I'd be worried. Just be upfront about your need for reassurance at calm times when you aren't too stressed about it.
rasputia
Sep 25, 2012, 07:51 AM
Thanks for all the advice. I am a little scared about being hurt. And, sometimes anything I don't understand or relate to, scares me. I am going to relax and enjoy my relationship and stop sweating the small stuff. I treat everyone with great integrity and if he ever disrespects me, adios boo!
Fr_Chuck
Sep 25, 2012, 08:29 AM
Only you know how he is honestly, this is same basic as men who are dating strippers and don't like it. Was he doing this before you meet him ? If he is gay, I guess I do find it strange he does not watch gay porn, but then watching porn is not real life, it is pretend
rasputia
Sep 25, 2012, 08:50 AM
Well I met him on the sites where he works... One year ago... He lives in a different country( a country that is very anti gay) but he spends most of the year with me. I guess it is in a way a new relationship because we were chatting online(regular sites) then we met earlier this year and now he is back with me.he says that he has never been with a man and, being with a man in his country is laughed upon. I wonder if he been raised to deny his sexuality on some level. And, shemales allows him to explore his sexuality but not seem abnormal. He has asked me to take him to a gay club because he thinks it is important to see people like him in an acceptable environment. And no, he doesn't really watch gay porn... and rarely str8 porn. Also, he said his fantasy was to have sex with a bottom and now he has that with me
joypulv
Sep 28, 2012, 04:30 AM
Based on probability, I predict that he will remain faithful. I base that on the fact that he is from an anti-gay country. He is understandably very cautious about what he does given that it's a small world and information moves like wildfire. You are his safe zone. It's no different from people who sort of wish they could sky dive or go deep sea diving or go out into space on a rocket ship, but stay home and watch it on TV.