Guys please help me, I don’t know what I am going through, all I can feel is pain and it hurts so bad in my chest.

Me and my girlfriend we've been together for 15 Months now and I can see the big changes from her. Since we’ve been together we never had a crush on others, until last month. But I know it started only when we always fight like every second night. Since we’ve been together we never had a crush on someone else until last month. It was the first time only. We talked about it telling each other how hurt it was because we are very used to go out just the two of us like we don’t think about others.

We talked about it, until we were back together without us having a crush on someone else.

My big problem is I noticed big changes from her mood and she doesn’t show affection to me anymore. She does sometimes but only a little. Whenever I am trying to be open to her and tell everything how I feel for her, she'll tell me that she loves me too but I can feel that there is no spark anymore coming out from her. Every time this is happening I always cry to her and I can feel like she doesn’t care at all even if she is trying to stop me from crying. But she'd be like " I am starting to get piss off now can you please stop crying and get over with that" or even if I am crying and telling her everything how it hurts to show me she don’t care, she won’t say any words at all. Like I will feel that she's not on the phone even if she is. She won’t say any word until I keep telling her to please talk to me.

It hurts a lot for me, we keep telling to each other that we’re going to make this work by making our relationship better like it used to.

I always cry to her and tell her how I feel because I can feel that she doesn’t feel the same way anymore like before. And it hurts a lot even if I force myself not to cry, not to show her my cry I can’t do it because I know in myself it’s only her that I need to get rid of pain that I am feeling. I don’t know what to do.

Before she is so sweet she always show affection, when I cry over the phone when we’re having a serious talk, she will cry too because she can’t stand the part that I am hurting. But now it always happening that whenever I cry because of the so much hurt I can feel in my chest, it seems that she doesn’t care anymore.

I love her so much I don’t know what to do on how I will get her feelings back like it used to. Please help, I am so tired of crying in my sleep, I felt like I am the only person who is putting effort in this relationship. Please advise. We’re both 19.

Harshness warning

Stop acting like a scared, insecure, emo, baby who needs constant attention, and reassurance, and be cool, calm, and collected and under control, as even love changes, and adjustments must be made.

Your biggest adjustment is to be positive and uplifting, and stop just be about problems, gloom, and doom. Its not what she is doing to you, but what you are doing to YOURSELF, and to her.

Grow up, and man up!!

Harshness warning

Stop acting like a scared, insecure, emo, baby who needs constant attention, and reassurance, and be cool, calm, and collected and under control, as even love changes, and adjustments must be made.

Your biggest adjustment is to be positive and uplifting, and stop just be about problems, gloom, and doom. Its not what she is doing to you, but what you are doing to YOURSELF, and to her.

Grow up, and man up!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Hi thanks for the reply I guess your right I am so emotional but I think only because I love her and I'm so scared to lose her. Do you think thts my really problem? To stop acting like that and just be calm?

There is only one possible way to bring her back to you and that is if you totally change how you are with her. Like Tal said, stop with the emo stuff and get a backbone. Stop sniveling and being so dopey. Only if you change and become a fun, interesting, adventurous, exciting, forward thinking, involved-with-life person will she even look at you again with any interest.

There is only one possible way to bring her back to you and that is if you totally change how you are with her. Like Tal said, stop with the emo stuff and get a backbone. Stop sniveling and being so dopey. Only if you change and become a fun, interesting, adventurous, exciting, forward thinking, involved-with-life person will she even look at you again with any interest.


Thanks so much, I have been getting this same advice from my friends but idnt believe them... until I got all this from you guys who don't even know me.. I know the problem is myself. Thanks so much this helps a lot. I told my girl that the problem is me, then she finally open up something that makes my heart melt. I love her to bits

Thanks so much, i have been getting this same advice from my friends but idnt believe them... until i got all this from you guys who dont even know me.. i know the problem is myself. Thanks so much this helps a lot. i told my girl tht the problem is me, then she finally open up something tht makes my heart melt. i jus love her to bits
So what are you going to do to make this huge change?

So what are you going to do to make this huge change?

Il be calm and less my drama. Thanks a lot it helps a lot when I send her a very long message about me realizing what I've done wrong

Hey I know how you feel, for the most part. Everyone is different, and everyone shows their feelings in different ways. I have suffered from OCD, ADHD, and depression all of my life, and it caused me to fear losing my girlfriend as well. And I'm talking irrational fears caused by intrusive thoughts. Even though these thoughts came after many many months of dating, they still caused a lot of chaos in my relationship.

Anyway the point I was trying to make is that it's normal for people to worry about losing their significant others, but in most cases if you worry too much, you will end up pushing that person away. You are the guy in the relationship, and you need to act like it. Girls like guys who show their emotions and are honest about them, but who can also control their emotions in a healthy manner.

Your girlfriend loves you very much, I'm sure of it. But I'm also sure that she wants a boyfriend in her life who is strong and emotionally stable , and that can take care of her when times are hard. She has her girlfriends to cry together with, you need to try to remember that you are the man in the relationship. Just remember that girls are complex creatures, and they want guys to be both strong and brave, but also open with their emotions and honest.

Just try to tone down on your sad, scared behavior, and I'm sure that everything will be okay between you two.