tonibrent
Sep 19, 2012, 12:59 AM
My 17yr old daughter will not talk to me no matter how many times I send her a text to say hi or to say I love you.
We are in September now but 2.5 months ago my daughter was my angel, she knew what she wanted to do with her life, everything, I paid for her to go to private schooling I paid for tutoring what ever it took to help her through school, she wanted to be a nurse in the baby unit... Wow this was great. Then she started hanging around this girl from school this girl was messed up she cut her self all the time {sometimes I think it was for attention, which my daughter gave her plently of}, but then there friendship started taking over everything. I had the school on the phone telling me that there friendship was a toxic one. I had the pastor telling me my daughter was not leading the "cutter" into a christain life... WTF..
My daughter started ditching classes, this was not like her... We had a fight over one of her assignments so she ran away and would not come home, there was nothing I could do. After a week I got her back home but she was not my angle that I knew. I tried to talk to her but she would not talk to me, she stayed on face book bagging me out calling me names and so was her friend the cutter. I let her drive my old car to school the only person that I said she could have in the car was her younger brother he is 14. She went to school on the Monday still not talking to me came home and stayed on face book she did not do any of her studies Tuesday came she drove to school again I tried to reach out to her I told her I could get her and three of her friends theses tickets to dream world Halloween in return I told her she needed to concentrate on school study and treat her brother nice and talk to me, she agreed to this but before I got home from work she had taken off, the cutter had texted her telling her to come get her so my daughter went running. I got home at 6 and no daughter I tried ringing her but no answer 3 hrs later trying all the time I had no chose but to call the police as I did not know if anything had happened to her, but the police said unless I charge her for stealling the car which I really couldn't as I gave her the keys there was nothing they could do. When she finally got home I was waiting on the steps for her She basically told me I was an idiot that what was she suppose to do not go, when her friend asked her to. I told her you were only aloud to drive the car to an from school as part of your punishment and that the only person aloud in it was your brother, she didn't listen to me so I told her she could not have the car tomorrow which was Wednesday, she replied, that if I didn't give her the car she would not go to school, and as I started work at 5 on Wednesday I felt backed into a courner so I gave her the car. Wednesday I gets a call telling me my daughter is not at school but out driving around with her friend the cutter. I prayed all the way to school hoping this was not the case, but it was. The principal told me she turned up to school her and her friend and they tried to get another kid out of class, that they were not in school uniform, I could not beleave it. I got my son from class and started driving up the road and who was driving down the road? You guessed it, my daughter and her friend, so I turned around told her to pull the car over, she did so in the school grounds. I took the keys out of the car told her I had enough, I could not take anymore I hope you are happy with you friend, got the car, parked it, locked it up, and drove away. Two days after that I was called back to the school, my daughter was staying where ever. I had a meeting with the school with my daughter, the principal, the other girl, and her carer. The meeting, I was not looking forward to, you see my daughter was in yr 12 her friend yr 11 it was Friday and the Tuesday coming was her QCS exams for her OP score, so she could go to uni but, the meeting did not go well both girls were expelled. I was so upset, but my daughter just sat there, she would not talk to me and the look on her face was, Oh well, who cares, it blew me away. I drove home after the meeting crying all the way, a million thoughts going through my mind as to what can I do to get her back on tract?? A few hrs later still no idea where my daughter was, another friend who leaves 9hra away and in the same town as her dad asked could my daughter come to her going away party... thoughts ran through my mind, I told her friend if you can get her to want to go I will take her. Here I was thinking I could leave her at her dads so I can get her back into school intime to sit her yr12 exams. At first my daughter said she would only go if I could take the cutter with her, I said NO... I would take you and only you, she eventually agreed, so I went and picked her up she packed an over night bag only and I drover her 9hrs away. Along the way I tried to get her to talk to me, but she still wouldn't, when I got there I told her I was leaving her here to stay with her father and go back to school. That was nearly1mth ago. She never got into grade 12 to close to the exam, the school would not do it, they said she could go into yr 11 and repeat yr 12 next yr, she wanted to do this.. She lasted at her fathers for 3 days before he flogged her, yes, she probably needed it, but, she is 17, it was never going to work and the fact that she hates her dad would not have helped his course. She moved in with a house full of boys she had only just met, but she did no 1 of the boys. The first few days she was talking to me the she stopped, because after I found out she would not be there for 2mths but for 1.5yrs I said to her I would move up there, after saying that she wouldn't talk to me. I didn't move up there as yet, she talked to me 2weeks ago asking for me to put money into her account each week, so she can live. I did the frist week but have not again as she won't take my calls won't answer my texts. She has applied for living away from home allowance, but I told her I will never sign it because she has a place to live with us. I have asked her to come home she said she won't, she likes living where she is living now, she won't talk to me, last I heard from another friend is she is trying to hock up with a bloke so she can fall preganant at 17... I really don't know what to do I have made a mess of everything, her father won't help saying, it is all my fault and that I head ed the children, and why should he clean up my mess.. How do I get my daughter to talk to me again,, We have gone from bveing so so so close to being strangers
We are in September now but 2.5 months ago my daughter was my angel, she knew what she wanted to do with her life, everything, I paid for her to go to private schooling I paid for tutoring what ever it took to help her through school, she wanted to be a nurse in the baby unit... Wow this was great. Then she started hanging around this girl from school this girl was messed up she cut her self all the time {sometimes I think it was for attention, which my daughter gave her plently of}, but then there friendship started taking over everything. I had the school on the phone telling me that there friendship was a toxic one. I had the pastor telling me my daughter was not leading the "cutter" into a christain life... WTF..
My daughter started ditching classes, this was not like her... We had a fight over one of her assignments so she ran away and would not come home, there was nothing I could do. After a week I got her back home but she was not my angle that I knew. I tried to talk to her but she would not talk to me, she stayed on face book bagging me out calling me names and so was her friend the cutter. I let her drive my old car to school the only person that I said she could have in the car was her younger brother he is 14. She went to school on the Monday still not talking to me came home and stayed on face book she did not do any of her studies Tuesday came she drove to school again I tried to reach out to her I told her I could get her and three of her friends theses tickets to dream world Halloween in return I told her she needed to concentrate on school study and treat her brother nice and talk to me, she agreed to this but before I got home from work she had taken off, the cutter had texted her telling her to come get her so my daughter went running. I got home at 6 and no daughter I tried ringing her but no answer 3 hrs later trying all the time I had no chose but to call the police as I did not know if anything had happened to her, but the police said unless I charge her for stealling the car which I really couldn't as I gave her the keys there was nothing they could do. When she finally got home I was waiting on the steps for her She basically told me I was an idiot that what was she suppose to do not go, when her friend asked her to. I told her you were only aloud to drive the car to an from school as part of your punishment and that the only person aloud in it was your brother, she didn't listen to me so I told her she could not have the car tomorrow which was Wednesday, she replied, that if I didn't give her the car she would not go to school, and as I started work at 5 on Wednesday I felt backed into a courner so I gave her the car. Wednesday I gets a call telling me my daughter is not at school but out driving around with her friend the cutter. I prayed all the way to school hoping this was not the case, but it was. The principal told me she turned up to school her and her friend and they tried to get another kid out of class, that they were not in school uniform, I could not beleave it. I got my son from class and started driving up the road and who was driving down the road? You guessed it, my daughter and her friend, so I turned around told her to pull the car over, she did so in the school grounds. I took the keys out of the car told her I had enough, I could not take anymore I hope you are happy with you friend, got the car, parked it, locked it up, and drove away. Two days after that I was called back to the school, my daughter was staying where ever. I had a meeting with the school with my daughter, the principal, the other girl, and her carer. The meeting, I was not looking forward to, you see my daughter was in yr 12 her friend yr 11 it was Friday and the Tuesday coming was her QCS exams for her OP score, so she could go to uni but, the meeting did not go well both girls were expelled. I was so upset, but my daughter just sat there, she would not talk to me and the look on her face was, Oh well, who cares, it blew me away. I drove home after the meeting crying all the way, a million thoughts going through my mind as to what can I do to get her back on tract?? A few hrs later still no idea where my daughter was, another friend who leaves 9hra away and in the same town as her dad asked could my daughter come to her going away party... thoughts ran through my mind, I told her friend if you can get her to want to go I will take her. Here I was thinking I could leave her at her dads so I can get her back into school intime to sit her yr12 exams. At first my daughter said she would only go if I could take the cutter with her, I said NO... I would take you and only you, she eventually agreed, so I went and picked her up she packed an over night bag only and I drover her 9hrs away. Along the way I tried to get her to talk to me, but she still wouldn't, when I got there I told her I was leaving her here to stay with her father and go back to school. That was nearly1mth ago. She never got into grade 12 to close to the exam, the school would not do it, they said she could go into yr 11 and repeat yr 12 next yr, she wanted to do this.. She lasted at her fathers for 3 days before he flogged her, yes, she probably needed it, but, she is 17, it was never going to work and the fact that she hates her dad would not have helped his course. She moved in with a house full of boys she had only just met, but she did no 1 of the boys. The first few days she was talking to me the she stopped, because after I found out she would not be there for 2mths but for 1.5yrs I said to her I would move up there, after saying that she wouldn't talk to me. I didn't move up there as yet, she talked to me 2weeks ago asking for me to put money into her account each week, so she can live. I did the frist week but have not again as she won't take my calls won't answer my texts. She has applied for living away from home allowance, but I told her I will never sign it because she has a place to live with us. I have asked her to come home she said she won't, she likes living where she is living now, she won't talk to me, last I heard from another friend is she is trying to hock up with a bloke so she can fall preganant at 17... I really don't know what to do I have made a mess of everything, her father won't help saying, it is all my fault and that I head ed the children, and why should he clean up my mess.. How do I get my daughter to talk to me again,, We have gone from bveing so so so close to being strangers