Where do I begin? I think I was a victim of a "fake/flakey" friend. I am so confused by everything that happened. I am going to give the shortest version possible.

When I was working at a particular location, a new girl transferred from out of state. We will call her Karen. She started talking with another co-worker that no one liked. They seem to hit it off because they were from the same state. Well, I decided I would ask Karen out for Cinco de Mayo. She complied and we had a double date with our boyfriends. That night was the start of something great. Flash forward to 3 or so months later. Karen started to become overwhelmed with her personal life as her mother is sick and she is away from home. Her boyfriend is older and is going through a nasty divorce. I am in a similar situation in the sense that my father died last year and I am also dating an older man but his ex-wife does not cause any problems in our relationship. Karen's boyfriend is also working as a bartender at a restaurant and when she met him he was working as a doctor in a practice. Due to his divorce, he had to take another job to pay his legal fees... or so he claims. I googled the guy, his patients gave him bad reviews.

Anyway, eventually I left that particular job but Karen and I would still go out frequently. We ALWAYS had a good time. However, I noticed she would constantly complain about that mean co-worker that no one liked... we will call her Stacy. I never said much about Stacy to Karen because I know how words can become misconstrued. I was VERY nice to Karen seeing as I was looking to make more friends and I thought we had so much in common (similar backgrounds and dating situations). I also am not a mean spirited person. I began to notice that every time I linked up with Karen she would speak poorly of Stacy. She claimed she disliked Stacy but on Facebook I started to notice that they would hang out together... A LOT. She would be tagged in restaurant locations and take pictures together... but she would never do that with me.. only with Stacy. I was starting to think that maybe she was rubbing it in my face, but I didn't want to be sensitive about something like that. I was confused because she complained to me about her but then would turn around and hang out with her. This continued for some time.

Eventually Karen and I stopped hanging out as often as we used to. She works the type of job that is very time consuming so I am at the mercy of her schedule. I stated asking Karen if she would meet me for drinks but she completely stopped responding to my text messages. If she did, they were days later or her responses were sparse. She had no problem calling to vent.. but that was it. I noticed that Karen had a birthday around the corner and I asked her if we could met up. She told me she would let me know her schedule. 2 weeks passed... nothing. I called her and said I was going out of town but I would be back on a particular date and said I would like to meet her for dinner. She looked at her schedule and agreed to meet me for dinner. While I was out of town I got on Facebook and I noticed that she and Stacy WENT OUT AGAIN and Stacy baked her a birthday cake and they posted it on Facebook. That was a slap in the face. To add insult to injury I got back into town and called Karen... no response... I text Karen too... no response. I get back on Facebook 6 hours later and I find out her and Stacy hung out together the same day we were suppose to have dinner. I was so hurt and furious.

I don't understand what the hell happened. HELP!?

Oh wow... no one wants to answer? OR HELP!

It's hard to really judge what's going on because we have no idea where her priorities are. One thing is for certain though, it looks like you need to start looking for new friends. I would have been concerned about what she's willing to say behind your back if she's willing to talk about 'Stacy' and then turn around and hang out with her.

Forget about her and find someone else to hang out with.

PS: Sorry for the late reply, I wanted to save this one for lunch break (because of the length) seeing as how I'm at work.

Well thank you for at least responding. I think it's pretty rude that over 100 people have viewed this post and only one person took the time to respond. So I deeply value taking the time to do so. I agree, it is hard to judge, but that's also why I am confused seeing as I have been loyal to her. I am not speaking to make myself feel better... this is what others have told me based on what they have seen and our interactions. I just would like to know where this came from. It seems very random.

Well thank you for at least responding. I think it's pretty rude that over 100 people have viewed this post and only one person took the time to respond. So I deeply value taking the time to do so. I agree, it is hard to judge, but that's also why I am confused seeing as I have been loyal to her. I am not speaking to make myself feel better...this is what others have told me based on what they have seen and our interactions. I just would like to know where this came from. It seems very random.

Random it may be, but unless you hear it from her, there's no sure way to know why she did what she did. Just move onto new, hopefully better, friends. She doesn't deserve a good friend like you and you deserve much better.

Awww! Thank you! I just don't have many friends in this city and it's hard to make some. I hear the same thing... "join an organization"... "try to find like-minded people"... I don't think folks realize how hard it can be in your mid twenties to make friends that are worth a hoot.

Hello again Amp, been a while. Sorry you took a chance on a person that wasn't friend material, but these are the things we chalk up to experience for the next time.

You seem to go out of your way, and given her many chances to do the right thing. Her behavior is typical of people who don't appreciate the kindness of others, but now you know better. Yes there are these kinds of people in the world. You just met one.

Like you said, fake/flaky. But you are hardly a victim, as you had a fair warning, but kept trying anyway.

Heyyy! Yes, it has been a long time. I can't believe you remember me. I look back on some of my old posts from 4 plus years ago and I was so immature and desperate. I have grown so much and I can sincerely credit part of that growth from this site and people like you--wise people. So I have to say, thank you. As I stated earlier, I just don't understand where things went wrong. Part of my problem is I harp on "What went wrong"... sometimes I will never get a clear explanation. It is hard for me to fathom BECAUSE I felt we hit it off so well. As everyone has said, it is clearly best for me to move on and worry about people who want to be concerned about me and appreciate all that I have to offer.