I have a boxer that I cannot stand. I am home with him with two kids and do not have a fence for him to go run. I want to get rid of him because it is me having to deal with him. I have told my fiancé I am really stressed out and need a fence or an electric fence my friend would sell for really cheap. He keeps saying the fence will be up someday and he doesn't want the electric fence because it's a circle diameter. Anyway, I have tried to keep him out f the kitchen. He will literally jump on counter and get our dinner. I think it is gross to have a dog in the kitchen while eating. He is also not allowed human food except apples and carrots so keeping him out of the kitchen is smart IMO. So, now twice today after making him leave the kitchen he peed and pooped everywhere within an hour of each other. We have an open floor plan so he can see us and is literally two feet from the table in the living room. Also, he has gotten off the leash more times than I can count and runs around. I am afraid he will eventually get hit by a car. He is a good dog and usually very happy. He is extremely playful and I am super busy as is my fiancé. I do not think it is fair for the dog. He needs to run and play everyday but I can't just throw a fence up and my fiancé is who runs our finances. He knows how stressed I am it's been going on for a long time now. What can I do to prevent him from peeing and pooping and basically train him without him getting mad and going potty everywhere? He was house broken a long time ago so I know there is a behavioral issue behind these actions. I am very close to giving an ultimatum on the dog or me and I absolutely do not want to do that. I just want everyone to get how stressed out I am. I clean, cook, take care of the dog, and work two jobs a few days a week. I do everything except mow the lawn and take out the trash. We recently had my sister and her fiancé and daughter and dog who sheds a coat everyday move in with us. I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown but believe the dog is at the top of my stress list. Please I need some advice! I so love my dog I just do not have time for him.

I have a boxer that I cannot stand. I am home with him with two kids and do not have a fence for him to go run. I want to get rid of him because it is me having to deal with him. I have told my fiancé I am really stressed out and need a fence or an electric fence my friend would sell for really cheap. He keeps saying the fence will be up someday and he doesn't want the electric fence bc it's a circle diameter. Anyways, I have tried to keep him out f the kitchen. He will literally jump on counter and get our dinner. I think it is gross to have a dog in the kitchen while eating. He is also not allowed human food except apples and carrots so keeping him out of the kitchen is smart IMO. So, now twice today after making him leave the kitchen he peed and pooped everywhere within an hour of eachother. We have an open floor plan so he can see us and is literally two feet from the table in the living room. Also, he has gotten off the leash more times than i can count and runs around. I am afraid he will eventually get hit by a car. He is a good dog and usually very happy. He is extremely playful and I am super busy as is my fiancé. I do not think it is fair for the dog. He needs to run and play everyday but I can't just throw a fence up and my fiancé is who runs our finances. He knows how stressed I am it's been going on for a long time now. What can I do to prevent him from peeing and pooping and basically train him without him getting mad and going potty everywhere? He was house broken a long time ago so I know there is a behavioral issue behind these actions. I am very close to giving an ultimatum on the dog or me and I absolutely do not want to do that. I just want everyone to get how stressed out I am. I clean, cook, take care of the dog, and work two jobs a few days a week. I do everything except mow the lawn and take out the trash. We recently had my sister and her fiancé and daughter and dog who sheds a coat everyday move in with us. I am on the verge of a nervous breakdown but believe the dog is at the top of my stress list. Please I need some advice! I so love my dog I just do not have time for him.



Maybe I'm confused - to quote you: "I have a boxer that I cannot stand"... I want to get rid of him because it is me having to deal with him... I am very close to giving an ultimatum on the dog or me and I absolutely do not want to do that.. . Please I need some advice! I so love my dog I just do not have time for him."

You either love him or cannot stand him.

Which is it?

Once you post that answer I'm sure advice will appear!

I am as I said on the verge of a nervous breakdown so I typed real fast and am in tears if you have never been in a live hate relationship with anyone and can't just give me some advice without being rude then please just don't respond.

I am as I said on the verge of a nervous breakdown so I typed real fast and am in tears if you have never been in a live hate relationship with anyone and can't just give me some advice without being rude then please just don't respond.

Dogs behave as they're taught. Dogs are great at judging people. Your dog knows you hate him, and he's acting accordingly.

He does what he does, and you really do nothing about it other than complain about the dog.

This dog would be better off in a new home.

[QUOTE=JudyKayTee;3261821]Maybe I'm confused - to quote you: "I have a boxer that I cannot stand"... I want to get rid of him because it is me having to deal with him... I am very close to giving an ultimatum on the dog or me and I absolutely do not want to do that.. . Please I need some advice! I so love my dog I just do not have time for him."

You either love him or cannot stand him.

Which is it?

Once you post that answer I'm sure advice will appear!
I am here for some real advice. I am really upset. I assure there are people out there that have experienced a "love" and "cannot stand" relationship with their animal or even a person for that matter. I was crying when I typed that out. I don't want Anyone's advice who is just going to attack me and quote things I typed. So, if you can't do that please don't answer my question. I am a good person and am just trying to get some advice on how to help me with my dog.

I am as I said on the verge of a nervous breakdown so I typed real fast and am in tears if you have never been in a live hate relationship with anyone and can't just give me some advice without being rude then please just don't respond.


So - you do you love or hate the dog? You posted both.

If you are on the verge of a nervous breakdown, yes, rehome the dog. I'd also rehome the fiancé, but that's just my opinion.

I see no rudeness when I quote YOU. I made up none of that, but I did quote your own words.

If the "hating him" part is the true part, rehome him.

If the "loving him" part is the true part, find a trainer.

[QUOTE=JudyKayTee;3261821]Maybe I'm confused - to quote you: "I have a boxer that I cannot stand" ... I want to get rid of him because it is me having to deal with him ... I am very close to giving an ultimatum on the dog or me and I absolutely do not want to do that. ... Please I need some advice! I so love my dog I just do not have time for him."

You either love him or cannot stand him.

Which is it?

Once you post that answer I'm sure advice will appear!
I am here for some real advice. I am really upset. I assure there are people out there that have experienced a "love" and "cannot stand" relationship with their animal or even a person for that matter. I was crying when I typed that out. I don't want Anyones advice who is just going to attack me and quote things I typed. So, if you can't do that please don't answer my question. I am a good person and am just trying to get some advice on how to help me with my dog.


Where do you see a personal attack when I am quoting you? There are two different answers, one for if you hate the dog, one for if you love the dog.

Again - where is the personal attack? Please post my attack on you.

No one said you aren't a good person. If I did say that, please quote me.

And, no, I've never had a love/hate relationship with my dog.

You are sitting in front of your computer, crying, and your fiancé thinks the dog is a good idea - ?

Ok I guess I came to wrong the place. I don't just complain about the dog. I wasn't going to write a book. I am doing something right now by researching and asking for help. I have read a boxer book. I don't have money to take him to a trainer. My question was what can I do to train my dog without him getting mad and pooping peeing everywhere in the house. I also said he was a good usually happy dog and is very playful.. I left out he sleeps with me every night. Please don't be mean and just assume he is better off give me some real advice.

[QUOTE=JudyKayTee;3261821]Maybe I'm confused - to quote you: "I have a boxer that I cannot stand" ... I want to get rid of him because it is me having to deal with him ... I am very close to giving an ultimatum on the dog or me and I absolutely do not want to do that. ... Please I need some advice! I so love my dog I just do not have time for him."

You either love him or cannot stand him.

Which is it?

Once you post that answer I'm sure advice will appear!
I am here for some real advice. I am really upset. I assure there are people out there that have experienced a "love" and "cannot stand" relationship with their animal or even a person for that matter. I was crying when I typed that out. I don't want Anyones advice who is just going to attack me and quote things I typed. So, if you can't do that please don't answer my question. I am a good person and am just trying to get some advice on how to help me with my dog.

You mentioned the lack of fence many times. So I have to ask, what are you doing to potty train this dog? How many times a day does the dog go for a walk? When he goes out to potty, who's with him, how is potty training being accomplished?

If you're just putting a leash on the dog, putting him in the yard, and hoping that he'll learn that he has to potty outside, then there's your problem.

I'm not trying to be mean, I'm really not. But a dog is only as good as his owner. If the owner doesn't put in the time and effort to train, the dog will be a wreck, a nuisance. You hate your dog because you haven't trained him. You love your dog because you realize that you're to blame.

Do both you and your dog a favor. Give him to someone that is willing to put in the time and effort to train him. If you won't do that, and you continue the way you are, your dog will just get worse and worse. The older he gets, the more he's conditioned to do the wrong thing, the harder it will be to find someone to take him on.

You have no idea what it takes to have a dog, and neither does your fiancé. A dog is work. Either put in the work, live with an unruly dog, or give the dog to someone that's willing to put in the work. Those are your options.

If you choose to keep the dog, I'm willing to help. But, if that's your choice, you have to stop blaming the dog for his lack of training, and stop blaming your fiancé. You have to get up, and train the dog. If you can't do that, then give the dog a chance to live, and give him to someone that will train him.

Ok I guess I came to wrong the place. I dont just complain about the dog. I wasn't going to write a book. I am doing something right now by researching and asking for help. I have read a boxer book. I don't have money to take him to a trainer. My question was what can I do to train my dog without him getting mad and pooping peeing everywhere in the house. I also said he was a good usually happy dog and is very playful.. I left out he sleeps with me every night. Please don't be mean and just assume he is better off give me some real advice.


He can't "pee and poop" everywhere if he's in one room or in a crate.

Dogs don't get "mad" and "pee and poop" to teach you a lesson. Dogs don't think like people do. "Revenge" is not in their vocabulary.

If he is the object of like/dislike he undoubtedly senses it. Do him a favor - find people who actually will work with him.

You are this upset and your fiancé simply doesn't care? I think that's more of a problem than the "peeing and pooping" - or it would be in MY house.

And Alty said it best. Dogs take time. Lots and lots of time. Sometimes they have to "relearn." They aren't born knowing where to "pee and poop." Sleeping on the bed is not a good idea. I question whether the dog knows you're in charge.

How much time do you spend with the dog, training, teaching, every day?
\

So - you do you love or hate the dog? You posted both.

If you are on the verge of a nervous breakdown, yes, rehome the dog. I'd also rehome the fiance, but that's just my opinion.

I see no rudeness when I quote YOU. I made up none of that, but I did quote your own words.

If the "hating him" part is the true part, rehome him.

If the "loving him" part is the true part, find a trainer.
I am sitting here trying to get some help. I just want advice on my questions. I never said I hated him. As I stated before I am really upset right now. I love him but can't stand him when he acts out. I do not know what I am doing wrong or I wouldn't be here. I do know he doesn't have the chance to run outside like he deserves. I did say that wasn't fair for a dog. I do not want to give an ultimatum I made that clear. But, I am in nursing school and have two jobs and a two kids and have a lot on my plate, so when the dog is pooping and oeeing because he is mad he can't come into the kitchen I tend to get a little upset.

Ok I guess I came to wrong the place. I dont just complain about the dog. I wasn't going to write a book. I am doing something right now by researching and asking for help. I have read a boxer book. I don't have money to take him to a trainer. My question was what can I do to train my dog without him getting mad and pooping peeing everywhere in the house. I also said he was a good usually happy dog and is very playful.. I left out he sleeps with me every night. Please don't be mean and just assume he is better off give me some real advice.

You didn't come to the wrong place if you actually want advice.

If you want to hear what you want to hear, and don't want the truth, then you're in the wrong place.

Sometimes you have to accept that you're the major part of the problem. When you accept that, and listen, you can solve the issue.

If you can't accept that you're the problem, and need to change, then you're doomed, and sadly so is the dog.

Swallow your pride. No one is saying you're evil. We're saying that you don't know what you're doing, and the dog is suffering. Is that your fault? Well, once you know the right way, if you're not willing to implement it, then it's your fault. If you listen, and learn, and teach your dog, and still feel this way, then at least you can say "I tried everything I could".

So let's start from the beginning.

How has he been potty trained so far? How often is he walked? Tell me what you're doing to train him, how much time you spend doing this. We can go from there.

I'm really not judging. My main concern is for the dog, because really, this isn't his fault. Is it yours? If you know how to train a dog and didn't do it, then it's your fault. If you have no clue, and that's why this is happening, then I'm willing to teach you, but you have to be willing to learn, and take the good with the bad.

I am sitting here trying to get some help. I just want advice on my questions. I never said I hated him. As I stated before I am really upset right now. I love him but can't stand him when he acts out. I do not know what I am doing wrong or I wouldn't be here. I do know he doesnt have the chance to run outside like he deserves. I did say that wasn't fair for a dog. I do not want to give an ultimatum I made that clear. But, I am in nursing school and have two jobs and a two kids and have a lot on my plate, so when the dog is pooping and oeeing bc he is mad he can't come into the kitchen I tend to get a little upset.


Maybe you don't have time for him - again, dogs don't "pee and poop" to teach you a lesson. That's not how they think.

Two kids, two jobs AND nursing school. How much time do you spent with the dog every day? Who supervises him when you are in school and working?

[QUOTE=Hennali;3261837]

You mentioned the lack of fence many times. So I have to ask, what are you doing to potty train this dog? How many times a day does the dog go for a walk? When he goes out to potty, who's with him, how is potty training being

accomplished?

If you're just putting a leash on the dog, putting him in the yard, and hoping that he'll learn that he has to potty outside, then there's your problem.

I'm not trying to be mean, I'm really not. But a dog is only as good as his owner. If the owner doesn't put in the time and effort to train, the dog will be a wreck, a nuisance. You hate your dog because you haven't trained him. You love your dog because you realize that you're to blame.

Do both you and your dog a favor. Give him to someone that is willing to put in the time and effort to train him. If you won't do that, and you continue the way you are, your dog will just get worse and worse. The older he gets, the more he's conditioned to do the wrong thing, the harder it will be to find someone to take him on.

You have no idea what it takes to have a dog, and neither does your fiance. A dog is work. Either put in the work, live with an unruly dog, or give the dog to someone that's willing to put in the work. Those are your options.

If you choose to keep the dog, I'm willing to help. But, if that's your choice, you have to stop blaming the dog for his lack of training, and stop blaming your fiance. You have to get up, and train the dog. If you can't do that, then give the dog a chance to live, and give him to someone that will train him.
I have read boxers are extremely stubborn dogs and did not know what I was getting myself into. I also stated in my first post that I think it is unfair to our dog. We take him for two walks a day. I already stated he was potty trained a long time ago... we take him out on his leash to potty. I also take him for a run on e leash like 4 times a week. We are real health nuts. His food is more expensive then mine! I juice carrots and apples for him and I try to make sure he feels like part of the pack.l. That is why I am here because I do not understand what I am doing wrong. I do not believe it is always an owners fault but at is a whole other debate which is very controversial and this isn't the place for that. I do realize he should get out to run more. I do not get however why when you enforce rules he poops and pees. I watch dog whisperer I love that show it's on my DVR. I am extremely upset about this because I feel I have given as much time and effort I can to him. Could it be separation anxiety I mean why does everyone jump to its because I am a horrible dog owner? I'm really trying to be able to keep him here I'm not a dog abuser so I also see not having much time for him may be a reason to give him to someone else.

Maybe you don't have time for him - again, dogs don't "pee and poop" to teach you a lesson. That's not how they think.

Two kids, two jobs AND nursing school. How much time do you spent with the dog every day? Who supervises him when you are in school and working?
He stays out with guess what no accidents! I'm having trouble believing it isn't something he is doing because he is stubborn and angry or having some separation anxiety. I am home some days and my sister is here but she is in school too so he has her dog he plays with during the day if I am not here.

[QUOTE=Alty;3261844]
I have read boxers are extremely stubborn dogs and did not know what I was getting myself into. I also stated in my first post that I think it is unfair to our dog. We take him for two walks a day. I already stated he was potty trained a long time ago...we take him out on his leash to potty. I also take him for a run on e leash like 4 times a week. We are real health nuts. His food is more expensive then mine! I juice carrots and apples for him and I try to make sure he feels like part of the pack.l. That is why I am here bc I do not understand what I am doing wrong. I do not believe it is always an owners fault but at is a whole other debate which is very controversial and this isn't the place for that. I do realize he should get out to run more. I do not get however why when u enforce rules he poops and pees. I watch dog whisperer I love that show it's on my DVR. I am extremely upset about this bc I feel I have given as much time and effort I can to him. Could it be separation anxiety I mean why does everyone jump to its because I am a horrible dog owner? I'm really trying to be able to keep him here I'm not a dog abuser so I also see not having much time for him may be a reason to give him to someone else.


I have GSDs. Trust me, Boxers are a walk in the park. Want to talk about locking horns?

Running him 4 times a week isn't enough. He needs to exercise every day.

Just out of curiousity - who suggested juicing for him? I've had dogs my whole life (almost all rescues, many with bad backgrounds, problems with behavior) and I've never heard that one before.

If you don't believe it is at least partially your fault, again, your words, then rehome him to people who will accept that it's all his fault and will work with him.

I've had difficult dogs, dogs that could not be otherwise placed, my whole life. Who is with him when you are working your two jobs and going to school?

I agree with this: "I think it is unfair to our dog." Any other time in your life this could be a wonderful dog for you. He just isn't right now. There's no disgrace in that.

I do think you are overreacting, taking all of this personally. No one said you are a dog abuser. I "adopted" a 7-month old dog that the previous owners could NOT housebreak, no matter what. I didn't have a problem. She was housebroken within the week. Why? I have no idea.

And, yes, I also work - full time.

What do you mean by: "He stays out with guess what no accidents." It would seem he can't "pee and poop" in the house if he's outside. What am I missing?

You didn't come to the wrong place if you actually want advice.

If you want to hear what you want to hear, and don't want the truth, then you're in the wrong place.

Sometimes you have to accept that you're the major part of the problem. When you accept that, and listen, you can solve the issue.

If you can't accept that you're the problem, and need to change, then you're doomed, and sadly so is the dog.

Swallow your pride. No one is saying you're evil. We're saying that you don't know what you're doing, and the dog is suffering. Is that your fault? Well, once you know the right way, if you're not willing to implement it, then it's your fault. If you listen, and learn, and teach your dog, and still feel this way, then at least you can say "I tried everything I could".

So let's start from the beginning.

How has he been potty trained so far? How often is he walked? Tell me what you're doing to train him, how much time you spend doing this. We can go from there.

I'm really not judging. My main concern is for the dog, because really, this isn't his fault. Is it yours? If you know how to train a dog and didn't do it, then it's your fault. If you have no clue, and that's why this is happening, then I'm willing to teach you, but you have to be willing to learn, and take the good with the bad.
We walk twice a day. We take him out on leash to go potty. He stays out of cage when we are away and never has an accident. He has my sisters dog to play with and they love each other and are two males! We do many of dog whisper tools. We trained our kids with super nanny tactics. I think the only thing he is lacking is maybe time spent with my fiancé and time spent running outside. I have tried standing in the doorway so he learns he can't come in that room (learned on dog whisper). We taught him to walk with his methods too. I don't have 24/7 with him and am willing to learn. However, can it be anything other than my training? I don't have pride to swallow seriously I will admit when I am wrong. I am a very open minded person but this is pretty stressful and constant work.

Re-home him. I won't go into a detailed post about why, but that's my advice to you.

I have a stubborn breed too, much more stubborn, and stupid, than a boxer. I have a beagle. Cute as all get out, but dumber than a post. Training him has been a never ending struggle. But guess what? He's potty trained. I work, so does my husband. But he never has an accident. Why? I work at it every day. I work with him. When someone tells me that I'm not being a good pet owner, I listen!

You're making excuses.

Here's my take on this. You posted here because you wanted someone to tell you that you're not a horrible person because you hate your dog. I agree with that. You're not a horrible person. Neither is the dog. You're just not someone that should have a dog, and that's not a bad thing. Not everyone is cut out for this, it's a lot of work, commitment, and the whole family needs to be on board. It sounds like your family isn't.

You gave it a try and it didn't work. You don't want the dog, you're not willing to put in the work to train the dog, you're busy, and he's ticking you off, you can't stand him, and that's a quote.

He's not even 2. Right now he could be re-homed, and if it's the right home, he could become the dog he's meant to be, and he could be happy. If you keep him it will only get worse, and I know that sounds like criticism. It really isn't. I'm telling you that it's okay for you to give this dog to someone else. I'm not criticizing you. I'm saying that you're right. You shouldn't have a dog. That's not a bad thing. You're not ready for a dog. It's as simple as that.

Read this, and realize that I'm really not trying to be mean. I'm telling you the truth, based on what you wrote. You shouldn't have this dog. You can't handle this dog. You shouldn't have a dog period. Let him be a dog, and learn to be a good dog. Give him that chance. Find him someone that is willing to put in the time and effort. There's no shame in saying you don't have the time, and can't put in the effort. No shame at all.

You're crying because you feel bad for not wanting this dog. But crying about it isn't helping anything. Who suffers the most? The dog. Give him a chance!

I have a beagle. Cute as all get out, but dumber than a post.


Yes, beagles trump GSDs every day. Beagles do not go to College on scholarships.

[QUOTE=Hennali;3261855]


I have GSDs. Trust me, Boxers are a walk in the park. Want to talk about locking horns?

Running him 4 times a week isn't enough. He needs to exercise every day.

Just out of curiousity - who suggested juicing for him? I've had dogs my whole life (almost all rescues, many with bad backgrounds, problems with behavior) and I've never heard that one before.

If you don't believe it is at least partially your fault, again, your words, then rehome him to people who will accept that it's all his fault and will work with him.

I've had difficult dogs, dogs that could not be otherwise placed, my whole life. Who is with him when you are working your two jobs and going to school?

I agree with this: "I think it is unfair to our dog." Any other time in your life this could be a wonderful dog for you. He just isn't right now. There's no disgrace in that.

I do think you are overreacting, taking all of this personally. No one said you are a dog abuser. I "adopted" a 7-month old dog that the previous owners could NOT housebreak, no matter what. I didn't have a problem. She was housebroken within the week. Why? I have no idea.

And, yes, I also work - full time.

What do you mean by: "He stays out with guess what no accidents." It would seem he can't "pee and poop" in the house if he's outside. What am I missing?

He stays out of his crate. His crate was taken down. He stays out in our house no accidents. I said I walk him twice a day and he gets a run in four times a week at is all I have time for. I have a hard time believing many people even run with their dogs or even walk them and have seen many who are never outside except to potty that do not have this issue. I believe playing with the dog here everyday for hours is also exercise. I live in a neighborhood so cannot let him run. We taken once or twice a week to run at his parents without a leash because they live in the country. I don't know if exercise is the issue he's in very good shape and the best looking boxer my vet claims he's ever seen. I do agree though he would be better with a place to run everyday. I have read it can be separation anxiety so how would I as his trainer help him with that? During the day we put a radio on if no one is here. But like in the kitchen he is basically two feet from us being in the living room. I am not saying it is not my fault but I do know I do ore for that dog than anyone I know does for their dog but mine has the issue. However, they also have dogs that are a little older.

... However, can it be anything other than my training? I don't have pride to swallow seriously I will admit when I am wrong. I am a very open minded person but this is pretty stressful and constant work.


The bad news is that owning/raise a dog is pretty stressful and constant work.

Eventually they are adults, but that takes time.

Maybe the dog is somehow "flawed." If so, yes, he needs someone with experience in training dogs. If it's a behavioral issue, well, the best you can do is work with him BUT the older he gets, the more ingrained the "bad" behavior the less likely he is to find a loving owner in the future if you can't handle him.

I don't know anyone else's stand on things - I'm not a big "Dog Whisperer" fan. I have large breed dogs. My dogs outweigh me by about 40 pounds. Maybe the "wrestle the dog to the ground, pin him on his back, show dominance" works for other people. It's not an option for me due to my dogs' basic nature and our size difference.

I don't know what anyone else here thinks. Half an hour of occasional TV is good TV but not necessarily good dog training.

Yes, beagles trump GSDs every day. Beagles do not go to College on scholarships.

Beagles are adorable, great with kids, one of the healthiest breeds out there, breed of choice (sadly) for animal testing because of their lack of genetic defects.

But, a s whole, I've met slugs that are smarter and easier to train. ;)

Bottom line, I love our beagle bum. Love him so much. But he's the hardest dog I've ever had. He's been the hardest to train, and he's the one that's the cause of most issues (getting loose and running into traffic, not coming when called, walking him is a nightmare). I'm not a dog novice, I know dogs, but he's a trial. He's with us because despite all the difficulties, he's a good dog. I love the little bugger. Not once have I ever uttered the words "I can't stand him".

In other words, no, no scholarships for beagles. They're not a smart breed. But the good far outweighs the bad. But, getting to the good means a lot of work. A lot of work! That's true for any dog, but even more so for beagles.

This poster isn't putting in the effort. Boxers aren't dumb dogs. Who's to blame here? The owner. Even though the owner doesn't want to hear it. Who's suffering because of it? The dog. This dog needs a new home, with someone willing to put in the time and effort to make him a good dog. The OP isn't that person.

Re-home him. I won't go into a detailed post about why, but that's my advice to you.

I have a stubborn breed too, much more stubborn, and stupid, than a boxer. I have a beagle. Cute as all get out, but dumber than a post. Training him has been a never ending struggle. But guess what? He's potty trained. I work, so does my husband. But he never has an accident. Why? I work at it every day. I work with him. When someone tells me that I'm not being a good pet owner, I listen!

You're making excuses.

Here's my take on this. You posted here because you wanted someone to tell you that you're not a horrible person because you hate your dog. I agree with that. You're not a horrible person. Neither is the dog. You're just not someone that should have a dog, and that's not a bad thing. Not everyone is cut out for this, it's a lot of work, commitment, and the whole family needs to be on board. It sounds like your family isn't.

You gave it a try and it didn't work. You don't want the dog, you're not willing to put in the work to train the dog, you're busy, and he's ticking you off, you can't stand him, and that's a quote.

He's not even 2. Right now he could be re-homed, and if it's the right home, he could become the dog he's meant to be, and he could be happy. If you keep him it will only get worse, and I know that sounds like criticism. It really isn't. I'm telling you that it's okay for you to give this dog to someone else. I'm not criticizing you. I'm saying that you're right. You shouldn't have a dog. That's not a bad thing. You're not ready for a dog. It's as simple as that.

Read this, and realize that I'm really not trying to be mean. I'm telling you the truth, based on what you wrote. You shouldn't have this dog. You can't handle this dog. You shouldn't have a dog period. Let him be a dog, and learn to be a good dog. Give him that chance. Find him someone that is willing to put in the time and effort. There's no shame in saying you don't have the time, and can't put in the effort. No shame at all.

You're crying because you feel bad for not wanting this dog. But crying about it isn't helping anything. Who suffers the most? The dog. Give him a chance!

So you get That he should be rehomed from my complaining of him pooping and peeing in the house when we are standing right there? But he is fine when we are away. I think there are other answers to this I don't believe that what you have basically said is he needs trained. I have answered your questions but you haven't given me one training example. How many times should I was him and run him a day. Twice a day isn't enough? I mean I guess I don't get how you state you will help and after I tell you how much I do with him instill haven't been advised on why he doing it except it's my fault it can't be separation issues., but where is this is how to fix it..

[QUOTE=JudyKayTee;3261862]

He stays out of his crate. His crate was taken down. He stays out in our house no accidents. I said I walk him twice a day and he gets a run in four times a week at is all I have time for. I have a hard time believing many people even run with their dogs or even walk them and have seen many who are never outside except to potty that do not have this issue. I believe playing with the dog here everyday for hours is also exercise. I live in a neighborhood so cannot let him run. We taken once or twice a week to run at his parents without a leash bc they live in the country. I don't know if exercise is the issue he's in very good shape and the best looking boxer my vet claims he's ever seen. I do agree though he would be better with a place to run everyday. I have read it can be separation anxiety so how would I as his trainer help him with that? During the day we put a radio on if no one is here. But like in the kitchen he is basically two feet from us being in the living room. I am not saying it is not my fault but I do know I do ore for that dog than anyone I know does for their dog but mine has the issue. However, they also have dogs that are a little older.

Law or no law it is irresponsible to allow a dog to run. My dogs are on a fenced acre.

I don't know what "many people" do. I only know what I do.

A radio is not the same as having people, companionship. As I type this I have a dog on my feet. He likes the personal contact, always has.

My dogs also have the run of the house - they are where I am. Seeing you from another room may not be enough.

I am getting nowhere on this thread. I think you are defensive (as Alty said very well): "I have a hard time believing many people even run with their dogs or even walk them and have seen many who are never outside except to potty that do not have this issue. I believe playing with the dog here everyday for hours is also exercise. ... I don't know if exercise is the issue he's in very good shape and the best looking boxer my vet claims he's ever seen."

I've given you my best advice as a person who worked in rescue, who has had a number of dogs. I realize you have a "hard time believing" what other people do and don't do. It's not about what you believe and don't believe. It's what works and doesn't work.

Your beliefs and whatever you are doing for/with your dog are not working - you have a problem dog, and until you are open to answers and don't take them personally this thread will go nowhere.

I can only give you advice based on what you posted, and I have. I believe you are looking for someone to "blame" for the problem" - I do with him instill haven't been advised on why he doing it except it's my fault." He isn't raising himself. You are raising and training him. Yes, it's your fault if you don't have the time, money, energy to train him. I'm not raising your dog so it's certainly not my fault!

I wish you luck, I truly do.

So you get That he should be renamed from my complaining of him pooping and peeing in the house when we are standing right there? But he is fine when we are away. I think there are other answers to this I don't believe that what you have basically said is he needs trained. I have answered your questions but you haven't given me one training example. How many times should I was him and run him a day. Twice a day isn't enough? I mean I guess I don't get how you state you will help and after I tell you how much I do with him instill haven't been advised on why he doing it except it's my fault it can't be separation issues.,,but where is this is how to fix it..

I posted many times, and you didn't respond. I gave up.

I was, and still am, willing to help. But all you ever posted was "I'm busy, I do so much, I don't have a fence, I'm the only one caring for this dog, my fiance does nothing, I don't like this dog, I'm doing everything right".

Not once did you ever say "I'm willing to learn, willing to listen, willing to do things right". So I gave up.

If you want my help, want to keep this dog, want to make him a part of the family, it's going to be a lot of work. It's not going to be one post from me, minimal effort from you, and hocus pocus, it's all fixed.

I'm willing to do this. I'm willing to help. Are you ready and willing to answer some of my questions, and to put in the time and effort to do this? If you are, I'm here, ready, willing and able to help. But be honest with yourself. Are you going to listen, or are you going to give me excuses? If you're in, you have to be all in. It's time to ante up.

I'm not Cesar Millan. The shows you watch are an hour long. No one can fix this in an hour, not even Cesar. If you're in, you're in it for the long haul. If you can commit to that, stop making excuses, then I'm here, and I'll help. But I won't waste my time. So what's it to be? Do you want my help? Can you sit back, listen, and implement what I tell you? If you can, we can begin. But be honest with yourself. Be honest with me.

The bad news is that owning/raise a dog is pretty stressful and constant work.

Eventually they are adults, but that takes time.

Maybe the dog is somehow "flawed." If so, yes, he needs someone with experience in training dogs. If it's a behavioral issue, well, the best you can do is work with him BUT the older he gets, the more ingrained the "bad" behavior the less likely he is to find a loving owner in the future if you can't handle him.

I don't know anyone else's stand on things - I'm not a big "Dog Whisperer" fan. I have large breed dogs. My dogs outweigh me by about 40 pounds. Maybe the "wrestle the dog to the ground, pin him on his back, show dominance" works for other people. It's not an option for me due to my dogs' basic nature and our size difference.

I don't know what anyone else here thinks. Half an hour of occasional TV is good TV but not necessarily good dog training.
I watch and use those techniques it is more than just watching a show. I have read a boxer book and have spoke with his vet. I looked into training and did research in training with a company around here but research showed it wasn't a good choice. Plus it was a lot of money. I basically am willing to admit OK so it's my fault but what is the problem I walk and run him he has a dog he plays with. Sure he could use more time outside but I do what I can. He constantly plays with the other dog here. Which never goes outside for a walk might I add and is overweight but he behaves. Or he may just be depressed I don't know. I don't agree with whomever stated regime him without saying this is what you can do to stop the peeing and pooping. He does is right in front of us and never when we aren't here. So what training method can I use to work with him?

Beagles are adorable, great with kids, one of the healthiest breeds out there, breed of choice (sadly) for animal testing because of their lack of genetic defects.

But, a s whole, I've met slugs that are smarter and easier to train. ;)

Bottom line, I love our beagle bum. Love him so much. But he's the hardest dog I've ever had. He's been the hardest to train, and he's the one that's the cause of most issues (getting loose and running into traffic, not coming when called, walking him is a nightmare). I'm not a dog novice, I know dogs, but he's a trial. He's with us because despite all the difficulties, he's a good dog. I love the little bugger. Not once have I ever uttered the words "I can't stand him".

In other words, no, no scholarships for beagles. They're not a smart breed. But the good far outweighs the bad. But, getting to the good means a lot of work. A lot of work! That's true for any dog, but even more so for beagles.

This poster isn't putting in the effort. Boxers aren't dumb dogs. Who's to blame here? The owner. Even though the owner doesn't want to hear it. Who's suffering because of it? The dog. This dog needs a new home, with someone willing to put in the time and effort to make him a good dog. The OP isn't that person.

It's funny I still haven't seen one post that gives me another advice than to work with him. If you read all my post I do put in time with him. I am here because whatever I am doing is not working therefore, please give me something I can use to help. The dog is usually happy and playful. He isn't suffering. Mpoy shouldn't jump to conclusions idiot could go back and take out the I can't stand part I would. Mbut I was upset so I went away sat down and have been trying to get advice. Just stating Rehomed him or it's my fault doesn't give me any advice you can't get from these posts that he is miserable and is suffering. I'm sure others have had trouble with dogs in training and have worked with them. I have tried I have answered everyone's questions but cannot get anyone to simply state try this... or maybe if you did this instead when you done want him in the kitchen... or maybe not letting him in the kitchen is wrong... I don't know but geesh I'm really trying to get some help with this.

[QUOTE=Hennali;3261882]

Law or no law it is irresponsible to allow a dog to run. My dogs are on a fenced acre.

I don't know what "many people" do. I only know what I do.

A radio is not the same as having people, companionship. As I type this I have a dog on my feet. He likes the personal contact, always has.

My dogs also have the run of the house - they are where I am. Seeing you from another room may not be enough.

I am getting nowhere on this thread. I think you are defensive (as Alty said very well): "I have a hard time believing many people even run with their dogs or even walk them and have seen many who are never outside except to potty that do not have this issue. I believe playing with the dog here everyday for hours is also exercise. ... I don't know if exercise is the issue he's in very good shape and the best looking boxer my vet claims he's ever seen."

I've given you my best advice as a person who worked in rescue, who has had a number of dogs. I realize you have a "hard time believing" what other people do and don't do. It's not about what you believe and don't believe. It's what works and doesn't work.

Your beliefs and whatever you are doing for/with your dog are not working - you have a problem dog, and until you are open to answers and don't take them personally this thread will go nowhere.

I can only give you advice based on what you posted, and I have. I believe you are looking for someone to "blame" for the problem" - I do with him instill haven't been advised on why he doing it except it's my fault." He isn't raising himself. You are raising and training him. Yes, it's your fault if you don't have the time, money, energy to train him. I'm not raising your dog so it's certainly not my fault!

I wish you luck, I truly do.
So the one advice I got from this was maybe its he doesn't like being in the other room. Mi have practically been begging for someone to tell me what I'm doing wrong and what training tech I can use.

I watch and use those techniques it is more than just watching a show. I have read a boxer book and have spoke with his vet. I looked into training and did research in training with a company around here but research showed it wasnt a good choice. Plus it was a lot of money. I basically am willing to admit ok so it's my fault but what is the problem I walk and run him he has a dog he plays with. Sure he could use more time outside but I do what I can. He constantly plays with the other dog here. Which never goes outside for a walk might I add and is overweight but he behaves. Or he may just be depressed idk. I don't agree with whomever stated regime him without saying this is what you can do to stop the peeing and pooping. He does is right in front of us and never when we aren't here. So what training method can I use to work with him?

Potty training 101.

Take the dog outside. You have to go with him, on or off leash. I'd recommend on leash since you don't have a fenced yard. Give your potty command, I use "potty time", but you can choose whatever you want. Don't make it too long, ex: "it's time to go potty outside". One or two words at the most.

When the dog potties, party time. Tons of praise, a treat, lots of "you're such a good boy. What a good boy! Good boy! Good boy!" and lots of pats, pets and praise.

When he potties inside and you catch him doing it, a firm "NO!" and then take him directly outside. Stop him mid stream or mid poo if you can. Go outside, use the potty word, and do not leave the yard until he potties. When he does, go to step one, major praise, treats, etc.

The thing is, your dog is a dog. Dogs aren't people. Dogs learn to live with people, because long ago people realized how wonderful dogs can be. But, dogs are still dogs. They don't come into your home knowing that peeing and pooing in the house is not okay. They don't know that eating food that you left on the table isn't okay. They don't know that eating your shoes isn't okay. If they're not taught what you want from them, they do what instinct tells them to do.

Is it easy? Heck no. It's a lot of work. But, if you want a dog, then you have to put in the work. If you can't do that, then you shouldn't have a dog. That's my point.

I posted many times, and you didn't respond. I gave up.

I was, and still am, willing to help. But all you ever posted was "I'm busy, I do so much, I don't have a fence, I'm the only one caring for this dog, my fiance does nothing, I don't like this dog, I'm doing everything right".

Not once did you ever say "I'm willing to learn, willing to listen, willing to do things right". So I gave up.

If you want my help, want to keep this dog, want to make him a part of the family, it's going to be a lot of work. It's not going to be one post from me, minimal effort from you, and hocus pocus, it's all fixed.

I'm willing to do this. I'm willing to help. Are you ready and willing to answer some of my questions, and to put in the time and effort to do this? If you are, I'm here, ready, willing and able to help. But be honest with yourself. Are you going to listen, or are you going to give me excuses? If you're in, you have to be all in. It's time to ante up.

I'm not Cesar Millan. The shows you watch are an hour long. No one can fix this in an hour, not even Cesar. If you're in, you're in it for the long haul. If you can commit to that, stop making excuses, then I'm here, and I'll help. But I won't waste my time. So what's it to be? Do you want my help? Can you sit back, listen, and implement what I tell you? If you can, we can begin. But be honest with yourself. Be honest with me.
I'm sorry I didn't respond I was responding as I saw the posts coming. Apparently, I didn't see yours. I have asked a number of times on these post for training advice and have stated I am open minded. The only post I said I can't stand him was the first one because I was in tears and very upset. I am not making excuses I have answrered questions truthfully so no one just assumes one thing. My dog sleeps with me every night I love him I do work with hi. It is apparent something is wrong with what I am doing but that doesn't mean I shouldn't be a dog owner and rehome him as a couple people have stated. I would live some real advice. I can't be on here much linger tonight because it is past my night walk with him and my kids bedtime. I will continue to get on here when I can. Thank you.

What about a cable runner? It's not ideal, but you can put him outside without him running at large...

I'm sorry I didn't respond I was responding as I saw the posts coming. Apparently, I didn't see yours. I have asked a number of times on these post for training advice and have stated I am open minded. The only post I said I can't stand him was the first one because I was in tears and very upset. I am not making excuses I have answrered questions truthfully so no one just assumes one thing. My dog sleeps with me every night I love him I do work with hi. It is apparent something is wrong with what I am doing but that doesn't mean I shouldn't be a dog owner and rehome him as a couple people have stated. I would live some real advice. I can't be on here much linger tonight because it is past my night walk with him and my kids bedtime. I will continue to get on here when I can. Thank you.

I accept that.

I posted potty training advice. Please do read it. It's on this thread, a post above yours.

I will say, he's not a baby, you're going back to basics with him. Are his issues because of you, training, lack of training, separation anxiety? That I can't tell you without seeing your dog. But, the training techniques I posted, it's good advice. It won't happen overnight. You'll have to work at it, and be consistent with it. Give it at least a month, and be honest with yourself when you're doing it. Are you being consistent? Are you putting in the effort? Again, not judging, but you have to be all in, or not at all. Dogs aren't something you can be into a little bit. When it comes to training, you have to give it your all, and consistency, positive reinforcement, is the key.

I'm willing to work with you. Are you willing to work with your dog? If so, I'll be here. I'm not here 24/7, but post when you can, and I'll reply when I can. If that works for you, I'll be here, and I'll give you the best advice I can.

Heck, if I can train a beagle, I can train a boxer. ;) :)

Potty training 101.

Take the dog outside. You have to go with him, on or off leash. I'd recommend on leash since you don't have a fenced yard. Give your potty command, I use "potty time", but you can choose whatever you want. Don't make it too long, ex: "it's time to go potty outside". One or two words at the most.

When the dog potties, party time. Tons of praise, a treat, lots of "you're such a good boy. What a good boy! Good boy! Good boy!" and lots of pats, pets and praise.

When he potties inside and you catch him doing it, a firm "NO!" and then take him directly outside. Stop him mid stream or mid poo if you can. Go outside, use the potty word, and do not leave the yard until he potties. When he does, go to step one, major praise, treats, etc.

The thing is, your dog is a dog. Dogs aren't people. Dogs learn to live with people, because long ago people realized how wonderful dogs can be. But, dogs are still dogs. They don't come into your home knowing that peeing and pooing in the house is not okay. They don't know that eating food that you left on the table isn't okay. They don't know that eating your shoes isn't okay. If they're not taught what you want from them, they do what instinct tells them to do.

Is it easy? Heck no. It's a lot of work. But, if you want a dog, then you have to put in the work. If you can't do that, then you shouldn't have a dog. That's my point.
We take him out on a leash and he Gets walked. So, if he doesn't have accidents during the day when I'm not here and has been fully potty trained for a long time now is where I'm confused. I have read (yes on the Internet where it may be wrong) that they are stubborn and may get upset and act out. Is this not true?

I have a 3 year old boxer. She stays in the house while I am at work all day. She does really well. Doesn't chew, pee, poop, etc.. for around 11 hours during the day. There are a few things I have learned about boxers from having one and meeting others. 1.) Boxers get bored. They LOVE exercise and get restless and agitated. Try walking the dog regularly. I walk mine in the morning and in the evening. So, she is relaxed during the day and nice and tired at bedtime.
2.) Boxers are smart. And as was said before, they can pick up on your energy. You are the alpha in the house... the leader. If you are stressed and worried, it shows up in the dog. Learn some stress reducing tactics. Breathe. Remember, she is going to learn from you. I heard once, "You want a better dog, be a better person." Not that you are bad, but you get the point.
3.) I have to disagree about the dogs don't get revenge. Boxers do. If my dog is mad at me, she dramatically turns and sits with her back to me. And she use to pee in front of my bedroom door. That was when she was young. But you have to work with them to get them out of the habit. And the crate method has been the most successful for me.
4.) Boxers are very verbal. You may notice your dog making some strange noises at you. Not really a bark or growl or whine.. something different. They do this when they are bored, trying to get your attention, or need to go to the bathroom.

If you can work it out, boxers are very sweet and great guard dogs. Good luck!

I accept that.

I posted potty training advice. Please do read it. It's on this thread, a post above yours.

I will say, he's not a baby, you're going back to basics with him. Are his issues because of you, training, lack of training, separation anxiety? That I can't tell you without seeing your dog. But, the training techniques I posted, it's good advice. It won't happen overnight. You'll have to work at it, and be consistent with it. Give it at least a month, and be honest with yourself when you're doing it. Are you being consistent? Are you putting in the effort? Again, not judging, but you have to be all in, or not at all. Dogs aren't something you can be into a little bit. When it comes to training, you have to give it your all, and consistency, positive reinforcement, is the key.

I'm willing to work with you. Are you willing to work with your dog? If so, I'll be here. I'm not here 24/7, but post when you can, and I'll reply when I can. If that works for you, I'll be here, and I'll give you the best advice I can.

Heck, if I can train a beagle, I can train a boxer. ;) :)

I know he's smart that's why I wouldn't put it passed him to do it because he was mad at me:). I don't know if it is the potty training. Idk maybe it is. Meh does fine wi that.m we crate trained him and slowly weened him out when he didn't have any accidents. He did it today and sat next to it like haha I told you JFK but that's how I took it at the time because he had just did the same thing an hour before and right after I said out of the kitchen both times. I did not take him out immediately. I showed him and said no and got to work cleaning up. Next time I will take him out. We recent,y had big changes in our home with my sister and her and her family wi their dog moving in. It has been quite a struggle and their dog sheds a fur coat everyday so I have double the cleaning. The dogs get along which is great. Also, why does my dog whine when my fiancé and I hug or kiss. He literally says mom (we trained him that and love you:) whines and barks at us. Is this a jealousy issue? He normally has at least one person here with him. My sister is basically on bed rest pregnant so she can't takes him out and play. But the dogs play. We are a very busy family but the kids adore him and I want to do what I can to keep him here.

... 3.) I have to disagree about the dogs don't get revenge. Boxers do. If my dog is mad at me, she dramatically turns and sits with her back to me. And she use to pee in front of my bedroom door. That was when she was young. But you have to work with them to get them out of the habit. And the crate method has been the most successful for me.
4.) Boxers are very verbal. You may notice your dog making some strange noises at you. Not really a bark or growl or whine..something different. They do this when they are bored, trying to get your attention, or need to go to the bathroom.

If you can work it out, boxers are very sweet and great guard dogs. Good luck!


I'm sure one of "our" Vet Techs or training experts will join us, and I am not arguing with your experience. This, however, is what I read from a trainer with 20 years experience: "And, today I had a dog owner that tried to convince me that her dog pooped or peed in the hall as some kind of retribution for any indiscretion it assumed the owner had shown against it.

But I know that dogs are simple. They don’t spend their days planning ways to get back at us. They don’t feel guilt after the fact. Like it or not dogs live in the moment.

If he pooped or peed in the house after he got in trouble, it is probably because the confrontation made him need to go potty and he was afraid to come and tell you or spend time with you when you’re angry.

Does stress ever make you need to visit the bathroom? Stress and confusion can cause a dog to make a mistake.

People plan revenge, but revenge and the repercussions and planning of it is not in a dog’s vocabulary or ability. They are just not sneaky creatures! We cannot always anthropomorphize everything a dog does." Dogs Are Simple People (http://www.thedogtrainingsecret.com/blog/dogs-simple-people/)

We take him out on a leash and he Gets walked. So, if he doesn't have accidents during the day when I'm not here and has been fully potty trained for a long time now is where I'm confused. I have read (yes on the Internet where it may be wrong) that they are stubborn and may get upset and act out. Is this not true?

You haven't met stubborn until you've had a beagle. ;)

All dogs can be "stubborn", according to people. I will admit that some dogs are harder to train than others. Boxers really don't fall into that category. They're actually a very intelligent breed.

What am I trying to say? A dog that some people deem stubborn, is usually a dog that's not trained properly. Again, I'm not blaming you. I'd bet that this is your first dog. Everyone that loves dogs has to have a first dog.

Don't get your info on the net. Okay, I realize that we're on the net too, but one thing I can say about this site, after 4 years here, the people that post here, they know their stuff. I trust them (and me) above anyone. I trust them more than my vet, and there have been many times that I've proven my vet wrong because of my knowledge and because of what I've learned here from other experts.

The only downside to this site is that we have to do everything in writing. Writing is the worst form of communication ever! It sucks the big one! It's impossible. That's why most people get frustrated with sites like this. They write a one paragraph question, say one negative thing, and the people that read it can't help because there's not enough info, or they see the one negative comment and can't get past it.

In other words, I'll have to ask questions, we all will. The more honest you are (even if you think it makes you look like a bad dog owner), the better our advice. We can only go by what you tell us. We can only write what we know. You have to be honest with us, and realize that we really can't solve problems in one post. It may take a while.

If you meet me half way, I'll be there waiting. But you have to be honest with me. I may not like what you tell me, but I'll pass it over, and give you advice. But first, you need to stop blaming yourself, or thinking that everyone else is blaming you. If you never walk your dog, I need to know that. If you hit your dog when he potties in the house, I need to know that. If I ask a question, it's not a question in order to judge you, it's a question I need answered so that I can tell you what you need to do.

If you can agree to that, I'm in. :)

I have a 3 year old boxer. She stays in the house while I am at work all day. She does really well. Doesn't chew, pee, poop, etc..for around 11 hours during the day. There are a few things I have learned about boxers from having one and meeting others. 1.) Boxers get bored. They LOVE exercise and get restless and agitated. Try walking the dog regularly. I walk mine in the morning and in the evening. So, she is relaxed during the day and nice and tired at bedtime.
2.) Boxers are smart. And as was said before, they can pick up on your energy. You are the alpha in the house...the leader. If you are stressed and worried, it shows up in the dog. Learn some stress reducing tactics. Breathe. Remember, she is going to learn from you. I heard once, "You want a better dog, be a better person." Not that you are bad, but you get the point.
3.) I have to disagree about the dogs don't get revenge. Boxers do. If my dog is mad at me, she dramatically turns and sits with her back to me. And she use to pee in front of my bedroom door. That was when she was young. But you have to work with them to get them out of the habit. And the crate method has been the most successful for me.
4.) Boxers are very verbal. You may notice your dog making some strange noises at you. Not really a bark or growl or whine..something different. They do this when they are bored, trying to get your attention, or need to go to the bathroom.

If you can work it out, boxers are very sweet and great guard dogs. Good luck!

I'm happy to read you have a boxer! I don't want another dog I don't think I said that. In my original post I was crying and upset because he pooped and peed right after I said out of the kitchen (where everyone was) and then an hour later we were eating I said he did it again right after I said the same thing. The last time he actually sat next to his poop like hahamthats what you get for not including me. He gets jealous and says mom mom when I'm giving Attention to my fiancé he tries to get in between us. He lays right on top of me in bed. When I get upset I go away for a while to vent. I do that so the kids don't get upset and I fully believe in negative energy so maybe he is just as stressed as I am. I run with him four times a week walk him twice a day and take him out in between. Meh also runs at my boyfriends parents house once or twice a week. I need help figuring out how to fix it. I don't hate my dog. My dog gets attention. I personally don't have all day everyday but when I'm not here he doesn't have accidents.

I get what you are saying. Maybe I am a crazy dog owner... it's likely. However, She would go to my bedroom door right away no matter where we were (not planning all day, dogs seem to have very short memories)... and she only peed there when I started saying "No, I am too tired to play." She never peed there any other time, accidents happen. Dogs get nervous. But I tell you this dog is a diva. I love her. But she dramatically turns her back to me now, and only in these same scenarios. I'm just glad I broke her of the peeing to express herself.
I also have a English Bulldog. I have not noticed this behavior with him or any other dog I have had before. The bulldog does like to ride skateboards though, so that stereotype might be true. Haha!

Whatever the reason, the solution seems to always be consistency and patience.

I'm happy to read you have a boxer! I don't want another dog I don't think I said that. In my original post I was crying and upset because he pooped and peed right after I said out of the kitchen (where everyone was) and then an hour later we were eating I said he did it again right after I said the same thing. The last time he actually sat next to his poop like hahamthats what you get for not including me. He gets jealous and says mom mom when I'm giving Attention to my fiancé he tries to get in between us. he lays right on top of me in bed. When I get upset I go away for a while to vent. I do that so the kids don't get upset and I fully believe in negative energy so maybe he is just as stressed as I am. I run with him four times a week walk him twice a day and take him out in between. Meh also runs at my boyfriends parents house once or twice a week. I need help figuring out how to fix it. I don't hate my dog. My dog gets attention. I personally don't have all day everyday but when I'm not here he doesn't have accidents.


I don't think this is a "boxer" problem. I think this dog thinks he's in charge. How the situation got turned upside down - I have no idea! He tries to get between you and your fiancé? He's on top of you in your bed? He "says" "mom mom"? Dogs are not capable of saying, "ha ha." Did you read the thread I posted.

I have no idea how your dog got to be in charge of your house - but he is.

I was widowed. I live alone with two dogs. We've been through a lot, the 3 of us. An awful lot. I am in charge. There is no doubt about that, no doubt at all. Dogs are pack animals. Somebody needs to step up and lead the pack.

Whether you can afford it you NEED in home, personal advice. Eventually someone is going to get between you and your dog and it will be a disaster - for both that person and the dog.

You haven't met stubborn until you've had a beagle. ;)

All dogs can be "stubborn", according to people. I will admit that some dogs are harder to train than others. Boxers really don't fall into that category. They're actually a very intelligent breed.



The dog I had before my boxer was a beagle. I LOVE them. Yes, stubborn! Oh gosh. But after he turned two, the best dog ever. I would have another beagle, except I inherited the boxer and bulldog when I moved in with the boyfriend. I love them both. But I still think of my beagle baby all the time. I miss him terribly.

What about a cable runner? It's not ideal, but you can put him outside without him running at large...
I have done that but my fiancé thinks someone is going to steal him. I say he's a little paranoid and we live in a really nice neighborhood and have fantastic neighbors. He actually got lose one night and some people we are now friends with because of it took him in all night. Their kids renamed him and wanted to keep him. The family said he was very well behaved and had no accidents, didn't jump on the kids and listened very well. So, there are plans in the future for a fence. It will be winter by the time we have one though! I know no one believes that dogs do things out of anger and here is no evidence but I believe 100 percent dogs get anxiety and do things because of it. My friends dog is fine when they are there but when they leave she has to put her shoes up. Not her kids or her boyfriends. Must hers. They have other dogs and bones and toys. But the one dog will chew her shoes up if she leaves.

I have done that but my fiancé thinks someone is going to steal him. I say he's a little paranoid and we live in a really nice neighborhood and have fantastic neighbors. He actually got lose one night and some people we are now friends with bc of it took him in all night. Their kids renamed him and wanted to keep him. The family said he was very well behaved and had no accidents, didn't jump on the kids and listened very well. so, there are plans in the future for a fence. It will be winter by the time we have one though! I know no one believes that dogs do things out of anger and here is no evidence but I believe 100 percent dogs get anxiety and do things bc of it. My friends dog is fine when they are there but when they leave she has to put her shoes up. Not her kids or her boyfriends. Must hers. They have other dogs and bones and toys. But the one dog will chew her shoes up if she leaves.


My dogs certainly pick up on my emotions, without a doubt. I don't deny that. If I am anxious, they are anxious.

If you have the time, here's something I wrote about a dog that was absolutely 100% wrong for us, a real training problem: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/blog/andi-phyllis-diller-dogs-judykaytee-678813.html

How did Andi know anything that she knew? I don't know. How do dogs know when someone passes? I don't know.

Andi knew.

I don't think this is a "boxer" problem. I think this dog thinks he's in charge. How the situation got turned upside down - I have no idea! He tries to get between you and your fiance? He's on top of you in your bed? He "says" "mom mom"? Dogs are not capable of saying, "ha ha." Did you read the thread I posted.

I have no idea how your dog got to be in charge of your house - but he is.

I was widowed. I live alone with two dogs. We've been through a lot, the 3 of us. An awful lot. I am in charge. There is no doubt about that, no doubt at all. Dogs are pack animals. Somebody needs to step up and lead the pack.

Whether or not you can afford it you NEED in home, personal advice. Eventually someone is going to get between you and your dog and it will be a disaster - for both that person and the dog.

I agree. Dogs need you to be in charge. They will assume the position if you do not take it. You have to be the pack leader. I know that sounds corny, but true.

That being said, the breed does matter somewhat. As each breed is different in its challenges and maintenance. The more intelligent, the more engaged they need to me. Every type of dog was breed for a purpose, when they don't get to do what is natural for them to do, they can get anxiety and it turns out as chewed shoes or soiled floors. My bulldog, he could care less about going for walks. You could not walk him for weeks, and he is just going to sit there drooling, farting and happy. The boxer, forget it, she will be running up the walls! She MUST be walked regularly. The backyard isn't good enough for her. Dogs are nomadic, and many like to go for walks and smell things, etc. I walk her regularly and she is fine.

This is why I tell people, if you are going to get a dog, learn about the breed type before you get one. Make sure it suits your lifestyle.

Breed does matter, I'm not denying that. I've had many breeds, beagle being the toughest. But, even with the beagle I managed to train to acceptable standards. Is he a perfect dog training wise? No. Is he a good dog? Yes.

The fact is, boxers really aren't hard to train if you look at breed. They're a smart breed, eager to learn, easy to train.

Like Judy said, dogs don't hold grudges, dogs don't do things out of spite. That's a human emotion, not a dog emotion. Every singe training issue I've ever encountered, including my own training issues, were due to the human, not the dog, no matter the breed.

I don't think this is a "boxer" problem. I think this dog thinks he's in charge. How the situation got turned upside down - I have no idea! He tries to get between you and your fiance? He's on top of you in your bed? He "says" "mom mom"? Dogs are not capable of saying, "ha ha." Did you read the thread I posted.

I have no idea how your dog got to be in charge of your house - but he is.

I was widowed. I live alone with two dogs. We've been through a lot, the 3 of us. An awful lot. I am in charge. There is no doubt about that, no doubt at all. Dogs are pack animals. Somebody needs to step up and lead the pack.

Whether or not you can afford it you NEED in home, personal advice. Eventually someone is going to get between you and your dog and it will be a disaster - for both that person and the dog.
He doesn't say haha I meant that's what it looked like. But, he does say mom. There are many boxers on YouTube that do it. I don't know if it is a boxer issue but from what my vet and what I have researched they are stubborn. He gets jealous is how I take it when I kiss and hug my fiancé IMO. I think nick, my fiancé is the leader the dog listens very well to him. He may think he is when he isn't here though. He walks real well right beside me and rarely pulls on the leash even when we run. So if it is an alpha thing when nick isn't here then I guess I need help changing that for sure. He doesn't even get on our bed with an invitation but we do try to make him feel like he's part of our family. We can't afford the training because the only trainer I found here in town is over a thousand dollars and did not get good reviews. I think he's better being trained here with us that is why I am trying to figure out how. When he got owe, I don't know if you saw that post, neighbors took him in and said he was extremely well behaved. They wanted to keep him. He had no accidents and didn't jump.. The issue I am having is when I tell him to leave the kitchen or if he isn't included. It isn't daily. So I guess if it's an aloha thing with me then I need advised on how to change that.

My dogs certainly pick up on my emotions, without a doubt. I don't deny that. If I am anxious, they are anxious.

If you have the time, here's something I wrote about a dog that was absolutely 100% wrong for us, a real training problem: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/blog/andi-phyllis-diller-dogs-judykaytee-678813.html

How did Andi know anything that she knew? I don't know. How do dogs know when someone passes? I don't know.

Andi knew.
I will look at this tomorrow. Thank you if you have the time I will be back tomorrow.

Breed does matter, I'm not denying that. I've had many breeds, beagle being the toughest. But, even with the beagle I managed to train to acceptable standards. Is he a perfect dog training wise? No. Is he a good dog? Yes.

The fact is, boxers really aren't hard to train if you look at breed. They're a smart breed, eager to learn, easy to train.

Like Judy said, dogs don't hold grudges, dogs don't do things out of spite. That's a human emotion, not a dog emotion. Every singe training issue I've ever encountered, including my own training issues, were due to the human, not the dog, no matter the breed.

My beagle was the toughest for me too! Haha.. little boogers. You got to love 'em.

Boxers are way easier. Its just a matter of time with any dog. But they are so worth it. Even this snoring bulldog next to me!

What I see.. really isn't a problem with the dog... I see a problem with the fiancé making it so everyone is comfortable.

I own althetic sporting breeds.. their energy levels are not too far away from a boxer's energy levels.. and I honestly don't think I would want to spend every waking moment looking at my dog.. Of course you're not satisfying his needs.. dogs NEED to go out and be by themselves. They enjoy taking naps in the sun and rolling in the grass. This is a very tough situation.

I think the result to solving your problems is getting that fence up. I know I wouldn't patiently wait for my hubby to "get around" to building a fence of some type while the dog was going stir crazy.

If the fenced in backyard is just not financially possible right now, look in the shop ads of newspapers, craig's list and e-bay and find a kennel run. Many people with no fences will resort to a kennel run snug up tight to the house for free access or easy access for their dog to go outside.

I do need to point out.. that the majority of people who own athletic dogs, run them until they cannot stand every day.

I think this comes down to man vs animal. The animal has no choice but to act out. Is he being vengeful? No, dogs don't act like that. Does it seem like it? Very much so. But dogs live their lives minute by minute. They do not hold grudges or act out on it. Will they remember that a specific action will give them something they don't like, via you leaving. Separation anxiety or any type of anxiety is just like a panic attack for people. But, all they know is that you are not home and they don't understand why they didn't get to come with you.

The first mistake in handling problem dogs is leading yourself into believing that the dog is acting out in anger or is vengeful. Once that idea is out of your head, you'll be able to better handle him.

As far as his pottying in the house... he's just being naughty and is getting by with it. He also may not be getting out enough.. I know you're busy and have a life to live as well, but he just might not be getting out enough or long enough. I'm going to classify your dog as an "apartment" dog... and those dogs are HARD to live with.. I love my dogs.. would do anything for them.. but even I would have a hard time living with my dog in an apartment and have to be its everything. I enjoy having "me" time, and I'm sure my dog enjoys her outside time where she can do whatever she pleases.. I do sympathize your situation, its not easy.

I also don't think this is a training problem. You claim that your neighbors had no problems.. well, because he is out of his element and away from stress.. You're home is probably very stressful because you are trying to be who you are and dealing with a high energy dog, basically by yourself... with no outlet to let him just be a dog.

Just think.. you'd be the perfect advocate on telling people why they should not own a high energy breed in an apartment. :)

Personally, if I were in your situation.. I'd go buy a cable runner and tell my hubby that if he doesn't like it, he had better fix it. You need to do what's right for you.. and you need to do what's right for the dog. Your home is very stressful right now which is why everything is just toppling onto each other.. Everything he does gets on your nerves.. he doesn't know what to do.. get what I'm saying? Will this relationship ever heal or grow? I don't know.. some people just can't handle a problem dog after things are fixed.. too many bad memories I guess.

So.. instead of blaming yourself, blaming the dog and threatening to get rid of him.. find an outlet for him to get outside so you can take a break from him. Instead of thinking you are doing everything wrong.. just take a deep breath and realize that this situation is HARD.. especially with a high energy, athletic dog. Either take it with a grain of salt and solve the main issue, which is no outdoor outlet, or suffer through it until your hubby decides its time to build a fence.

Yes, I'm attacking your hubby.. he is not thinking about either of you. I realize that money is always a problem, and having the time is an even bigger problem, but to do absolutely nothing is just as big of a problem.

Find a way to solve it.. it may not be ideal, it may not be perfect or even permanent, but to give you and the dog some time to cool off is priceless...


My friends dog is fine when they are there but when they leave she has to put her shoes up. Not her kids or her boyfriends. Must hers. They have other dogs and bones and toys. But the one dog will chew her shoes up if she leaves.

Once again.. don't start thinking dogs are vengeful.. Dogs will do very weird things when they are fighting for the alpha slot. This dog is wanting to call the shots.. she is not mad or upset that they left her.. she is just expressing her challenge for alpha leader.

My beagle was the toughest for me too! Haha..little boogers. You got to love 'em.

Boxers are way easier. Its just a matter of time with any dog. But they are so worth it. Even this snoring bulldog next to me!

I hear you. Love my beagle, but boy oh boy. Little bugger. He's the most stubborn dog I've ever known. But he's such a little lovey. Really hard to get mad at him. He's such a sweet dog.

I also have a 6 month old border collie cross. The beagle is 4 years old. Of the two of, them the border collie, even with the full blown puppy energy, is better behaved. He was easy to train. Smart breed.

Having said that. The same 6 month old border collie ate one of my shoes today. Do I hate him because of it? Not at all. He's a dog. When he ate the shoe I learned that I haven't spent enough time training him to leave my shoes alone. He didn't do it out of spite. He didn't do it to get back at me for something. He didn't do it because he's upset. He ate the shoe because he's a dog, the shoe was there, and I (the human) haven't spent enough time with him teaching him to leave my shoes alone. That's not his fault. That's mine.

My dogs certainly pick up on my emotions, without a doubt. I don't deny that. If I am anxious, they are anxious.

If you have the time, here's something I wrote about a dog that was absolutely 100% wrong for us, a real training problem: https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/blog/andi-phyllis-diller-dogs-judykaytee-678813.html

How did Andi know anything that she knew? I don't know. How do dogs know when someone passes? I don't know.

Andi knew.

Your story brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing.

Your story brought tears to my eyes. Thank you for sharing.


I just wanted you to know that very difficult dogs take extra work - but it does play out in the end.

Hi -- I am an avid doggy lover and so I am reading all of the comments with some interest. I also don't understand the attitude in here. I have to agree with the original poster that for some reason when she asked for advice all she is receiving is attention to the fact that she has a love/hate relationship with her dog at the moment.

Here is what I have experienced: When I was much younger and newly married I wanted a dog. I was not equipped to deal with a dog but I thought that I was. Because I wasn't equipped with the knowledge I needed to make our relationship a good one, there were a myriad of issues and just like the poster above, I ended up having a love/hate relationship with my dog, which I eventually ended up giving to my mother who gave her what I could not at the time. I loved the dog, but the dog had been so much of a problem that there were times I really hated that dog, too. Ultimately the problem was me, but no one told me the key information I needed to get through it all, so now I am going to give the information to the poster that I never got and that I think she is asking for, and I sincerely wish her the absolute best, and I hope this helps her out :o)

Here's the thing that needs to be done right now: you need to invest in a crate. That crate is going to save your relationship and bring it back into the loving and caring type that both you and your doggie deserve. That crate is going to become your dog's house, his security, and his training tool. Even if he doesn't like the crate at first, and many dogs who haven't been initiated from the start with one have a bit of a struggle at first, but he will eventually come around, I promise, if you persist.

In the beginning you should only allow your dog out of the crate if you and the dog are going to be playing together or if he is going to receive your constant attention, for feeding, and for going to the bathroom. I would also invest in a long lead and a harness so that when you put the dog out to potty all you need to do is hook his harness to the lead line and it is almost as effective as if you had a fence as long as you don't leave him on it for more than 15 minutes at a time, where it is used for bathroom breaks and not for just "putting the dog outside". You really do need a fence, however, as a lead line is only a temporary fix. And the harness is much more humane as it doesn't pull on his neck.

So now, you have a crate. Each time you let the dog out of the crate, you should be putting it on the lead to go potty. Then you should bring him in again and play with him for at least 10-15 minutes. Have special toys that you save just for that occasion. For feeding time, let the dog out of the crate and potty him, then feed him, play for 5-10 minutes, and then potty him again, and then put him away. Make sure he has in his crate a favorite blanket, a chew toy such as a rawhide treat that he likes, and a toy to play with. Don't leave him in the crate for more than three hours at a time at first unless you work all day, at which point you should have someone coming and letting him out at midday to play for a while, get water, potty, etc.

You will find that as time goes by, you can have the times the dog is allowed outside of the crate gets longer and longer until eventually you can leave the crate door open all the time, or nearly so, and have confidence that the dog can be unsupervised for periods without having an accident since you reinforced pottying outside. You should never take that crate away because it is his security, so plan to have it for life. That is why it should be large enough for the dog to be able to turn around freely, but small enough that the dog cannot set aside a spot to go potty, because dogs will normally not potty in their houses. Also, it might be good to get on Amazon and research a good book on dog training. I would recommend 101 Dog Tricks by Kyra Sundance and Chalcy.

I hope this helps you out and I wish you a long and loving relationship with your doggie! Take care :o)

Hi -- I am an avid doggy lover and so i am reading all of the comments with some interest. I also don't understand the attitude in here. I have to agree with the original poster that for some reason when she asked for advice all she is receiving is attention to the fact that she has a love/hate relationship with her dog at the moment.


I will attempt to say this without being offensive and without judging - you've posted twice. Alty and I alone have posted over 65,600 times. Please don't criticize anyone until you have more notches in your belt.

OP has a crate; OP did practice crate training.

I agree with your advice. I just have a problem with your opening attitude.

I am an avid doggy lover and so I am reading all of the comments with some interest. I also don't understand the attitude in here. I have to agree with the original poster that for some reason when she asked for advice all she is receiving is attention to the fact that she has a love/hate relationship with her dog at the moment.

Did you read the entire thread? Many times I asked questions that would lead to better advice. Those questions weren't answered. I then asked the poster if she wanted help, that post wasn't answered. I then posted step by step instructions, that post was ignored.

The fact that she dislikes the dog has a huge part in all of this. Any dog expert can tell you that.

Did you read the entire thread?


I never understand why someone comes on AMHD and the very first post criticizes everyone else who has posted. In this case I believe this person has/had a lot to offer but certainly didn't start on the right foot.

Maybe she's a Vet Tech (or, I guess, a Vet) or a professional trainer (and not someone who works at PetSmart (or wherever), but he/she has no idea who else on her is licensed or trained or works in the profession. Maybe everyone on the pet forums isn't guessing and fumbling around in the dark for an answer.

And in this case criticizing without reading is not a terribly good idea.

I'm not saying that posting X times makes someone an expert or a reliable source. I am saying that I'd wait until I saw how things work, what other people post, before I'd start with criticism.

Over and out.

Thank you everyone for your help. I did feel at first that everyone was just judging from one thing I stated which was I can't stand my dog. It is a love/hate relationship. However, what I mentioned throughout the rest of the posts was all the things we do for him and how smart he is. I believe now from speaking with a trainer today and his vet is that it is stress. As I stated we had big changes in his routine because a whole family with another dog moved in. I did have a crate and weaned him out and took it down a week ago. I will now put it back up from the advice of charmlovesdog. There were some folks who came in without reading all the posts and I had to repeat myself. I was defensive because I was asking for advice and I was getting it is the owners fault (I do agree) but without any training advice. Some said he wasn't potty trained, but I made it apparent he was, for a very long time, in the first few posts. I was also very upset and didn't include much about how good of a dog he usually is and that this isn't something that has been going on all along.m something disrupted his routine and made him stress. I know some are not of the opinion that he can do things out of anger. I believe he can and does maybe not towards me but if he is upset or stressed he reacts. Both trainer and vet said it is entirely possible he is stressed or upset about the new dog more kids taking attention away from him. I will from now on put him in his crate while cooking and eating dinner because for some reason this is when it happens. I don't think dogs hold grudges because my dog loves me like crazy. I know one was under the assumption he thinks he runs my household, and after spending the whole day with him and trainer and vet then back home I definitely disagree. I was calm he was calm. Magpie mentioned the energy and perhaps cooking dinner and cleaning with all the new members in the family has me stressed to the max. So, I agree it has been me. I don't think he should be regimes, in fact I was told how wonderful of a job I am doing with him today. He sits, rolls over, lays down, speaks, says mom, you can make him sit outside (by front door inside) and he won't move till you clap your hands. I can set a treat on top of his nose and he wnt eat it tilli clap my hands. I am thankful for all the responses I got. I appreciate it. I just wish some of you would not just jump to conclusion from one thing I said. Alty, I am sincerely sorry I didn't see your post I was trying to respond but the responses came fast lol it was unintentional. I am definitely better today. I had an extremely bad day with him yesterday and I am seeking the help of others as well as researching. I already read a book and have worked with him. If you read all the posts even in the beginning you can see I was trying to explain the good of our relationship. I am not reforming him he's right where he needs to be and I will work on myself and try to breath through the bad days. Thank you all so much.

Thank you everyone for your help. I did feel at first that everyone was just judging from one thing I stated which was I can't stand my dog. It is a love/hate relationship. However, what I mentioned throughout the rest of the posts was all the things we do for him and how smart he is. I believe now from speaking with a trainer today and his vet is that it is stress. As I stated we had big changes in his routine bc a whole family with another dog moved in. I did have a crate and weaned him out and took it down a week ago. I will now put it back up from the advice of charmlovesdog. There were some folks who came in without reading all the posts and I had to repeat myself. I was defensive bc I was asking for advice and I was getting it is the owners fault (I do agree) but without any training advice. Some said he wasn't potty trained, but I made it apparent he was, for a very long time, in the first few posts. I was also very upset and didn't include much about how good of a dog he usually is and that this isn't something that has been going on all along.m something disrupted his routine and made him stress. I know some are not of the opinion that he can do things out of anger. I believe he can and does maybe not towards me but if he is upset or stressed he reacts. Both trainer and vet said it is entirely possible he is stressed or upset about the new dog more kids taking attention away from him. I will from now on put him in his crate while cooking and eating dinner because for some reason this is when it happens. I don't think dogs hold grudges bc my dog loves me like crazy. I know one was under the assumption he thinks he runs my household, and after spending the whole day with him and trainer and vet then back home I definetly disagree. I was calm he was calm. Magpie mentioned the energy and perhaps cooking dinner and cleaning with all the new members in the family has me stressed to the max. So, I agree it has been me. I don't think he should be regimes, in fact I was told how wonderful of a job I am doing with him today. He sits, rolls over, lays down, speaks, says mom, you can make him sit outside (by front door inside) and he won't move till you clap your hands. I can set a treat on top of his nose and he wnt eat it tilli clap my hands. I am thankful for all the responses I got. I appreciate it. I just wish some of you would not just jump to conclusion from one thing I said. Alty, i am sincerely sorry I didn't see your post I was trying to respond but the responses came fast lol it was unintentional. I am definetly better today. I had an extremely bad day with him yesterday and I am seeking the help of others as well as researching. I already read a book and have worked with him. If you read all the posts even in the beginning you can see I was trying to explain the good of our relationship. I am not reforming him he's right where he needs to be and I will work on myself and try to breath through the bad days. Thank you all so much.
My grammar is poor I mean re home when it states regimes and reforming.. darn auto correct:)

Alty, I am sincerely sorry I didn't see your post I was trying to respond but the responses came fast lol it was unintentional. I am definitely better today. I had an extremely bad day with him yesterday and I am seeking the help of others as well as researching. I already read a book and have worked with him. If you read all the posts even in the beginning you can see I was trying to explain the good of our relationship. I am not reforming him he's right where he needs to be and I will work on myself and try to breath through the bad days. Thank you all so much.

Things can move quickly here, I get that.

I wasn't upset with you. I was upset with that poster. I did do my best, and you either didn't see my posts, or didn't reply to them. No worries. The written word sucks as a form of communication.

I'm glad that you're working with him, and my offer still stands. If you want help, I'm willing to give it. I'm just a post away. I may have questions, and those questions are never because I'm a nosy person, it's because I need those answers to help you and the dog. I may not give a solution right away, not until I know what I need to know, but if you work with me, and promise to work with your dog, I'll work with you. That's my promise to you. :)

Now, let's get to a brighter note. Can we see a picture of this fur baby? If you go to the dog forum page there's a sticky (a permanent thread) on how to post pictures. If you're don't want to, that's fine. If you do and can't figure it out, post and tell me, and I'll post a link. :)

Hi -- I am an avid doggy lover and so i am reading all of the comments with some interest. I also don't understand the attitude in here. I have to agree with the original poster that for some reason when she asked for advice all she is receiving is attention to the fact that she has a love/hate relationship with her dog at the moment.

Here is what I have experienced: When I was much younger and newly married I wanted a dog. I was not equipped to deal with a dog but I thought that I was. Because I wasn't equipped with the knowledge I needed to make our relationship a good one, there were a myriad of issues and just like the poster above, I ended up having a love/hate relationship with my dog, which I eventually ended up giving to my mother who gave her what I could not at the time. I loved the dog, but the dog had been so much of a problem that there were times I really hated that dog, too. Ultimately the problem was me, but no one told me the key information I needed to get through it all, so now I am going to give the information to the poster that I never got and that I think she is asking for, and I sincerely wish her the absolute best, and I hope this helps her out :o)

Here's the thing that needs to be done right now: you need to invest in a crate. That crate is going to save your relationship and bring it back into the loving and caring type that both you and your doggie deserve. That crate is going to become your dog's house, his security, and his training tool. Even if he doesn't like the crate at first, and many dogs who haven't been initiated from the start with one have a bit of a struggle at first, but he will eventually come around, I promise, if you persist.

In the beginning you should only allow your dog out of the crate if you and the dog are going to be playing together or if he is going to receive your constant attention, for feeding, and for going to the bathroom. I would also invest in a long lead and a harness so that when you put the dog out to potty all you need to do is hook his harness to the lead line and it is almost as effective as if you had a fence as long as you don't leave him on it for more than 15 minutes at a time, where it is used for bathroom breaks and not for just "putting the dog outside". You really do need a fence, however, as a lead line is only a temporary fix. And the harness is much more humane as it doesn't pull on his neck.

So now, you have a crate. Each time you let the dog out of the crate, you should be putting it on the lead to go potty. Then you should bring him in again and play with him for at least 10-15 minutes. Have special toys that you save just for that occasion. For feeding time, let the dog out of the crate and potty him, then feed him, play for 5-10 minutes, and then potty him again, and then put him away. Make sure he has in his crate a favorite blanket, a chew toy such as a rawhide treat that he likes, and a toy to play with. Don't leave him in the crate for more than three hours at a time at first unless you work all day, at which point you should have someone coming and letting him out at midday to play for a while, get water, potty, etc.

You will find that as time goes by, you can have the times the dog is allowed outside of the crate gets longer and longer until eventually you can leave the crate door open all the time, or nearly so, and have confidence that the dog can be unsupervised for periods without having an accident since you reinforced pottying outside. You should never take that crate away because it is his security, so plan to have it for life. That is why it should be large enough for the dog to be able to turn around freely, but small enough that the dog cannot set aside a spot to go potty, because dogs will normally not potty in their houses. Also, it might be good to get on Amazon and research a good book on dog training. I would recommend 101 Dog Tricks by Kyra Sundance and Chalcy.

I hope this helps you out and I wish you a long and loving relationship with your doggie! Take care :o)

Thank you for the advice. I did crate train him but thought he didn't need it because he never has accidents. I believe he was stressed because it was within an hour of each other and his bowels just started going. I will take your advice and put it back up though that may be a contributing factor to his stress:)

Things can move quickly here, I get that.

I wasn't upset with you. I was upset with that poster. I did do my best, and you either didn't see my posts, or didn't reply to them. No worries. The written word sucks as a form of communication.

I'm glad that you're working with him, and my offer still stands. If you want help, I'm willing to give it. I'm just a post away. I may have questions, and those questions are never because I'm a nosy person, it's because I need those answers to help you and the dog. I may not give a solution right away, not until I know what I need to know, but if you work with me, and promise to work with your dog, I'll work with you. That's my promise to you. :)

Now, let's get to a brighter note. Can we see a picture of this fur baby? If you go to the dog forum page there's a sticky (a permanent thread) on how to post pictures. If you're don't want to, that's fine. If you do and can't figure it out, post and tell me, and I'll post a link. :)

Will do! I have moved all photos off my device so I will get on that tomorrow... my fiancé is a little annoyed because I'm on my iPad again tonight lol! Thank you! I will take any advice! Except re homing him;)

Thank you for the advice. I did crate train him but thought he didn't need it bc he never has accidents. I believe he was stressed bc it was within an hour of eachother and his bowels just started going. I will take your advice and put it back up though that may be a contributing factor to his stress:)

I have to say, despite my reaction to this poster, I do agree with crating. Your dog is now older, so re-training to use the crate will be harder, but crate training is the best thing.

Think of crate training, and crating, this way. In the wild dogs live in dens. A den is a safe place, a place to hide, a place to sleep, eat, and feel safe. To a domesticated dog a crate is like a den. Just because your dog is a pet doesn't mean he doesn't still have wild instincts.

Puppies usually cry when crated not because of the crate, but because they've lost their litter mates, their mom. It's a hard adjustment. Most pet owners give up because puppy is crying, and they think that means puppy hates the crate. That's not the case.

In the wild mommy teaches the babies never to pee in the den. From the first days of their lives they go outside of the den to pee. Of course their den doesn't have a door, so they can choose to leave and pee when they need to. Fact is most dogs (except shelter dogs, and puppymill dogs) won't ever pee or poo in their crate unless they really can't hold it.

The rule for crating (during the day) is one hour/month of age. In other words, a 2 month old puppy should spend no more than 2 hours in the crate during the day without being relieved. That doesn't mean that you can leave a 2 year old dog in the crate for an entire day (being facetious here), but a puppy will need to be relieved, as an older dog (over 2 years of age) can spend a work day in the crate with no accidents (unless there's a medical condition, or other issues).

Boy oh boy, don't get me started, I'll write you a book. :(

Will do! I have moved all photos off my device so I will get on that tomorrow...my fiancé is a little annoyed because I'm on my iPad again tonight lol! Thank you! I will take any advice! Except re homing him;)

I'm glad.

I only suggested re-homing for your sake, and the dogs, because at first I felt you really didn't want the dog.

Like I said, the written word sucks. Sadly that's what we have to work with on this site, and many times we see something, read it, and that's all we can remember, that's all we care about. It can change the way we handle a question. Remember, we're all human, and we volunteer here. We answer questions on the dog forum because we love dogs. When someone says they're not fond of their dog, we go on defense mode. You'll understand when you've been here a while, when you've read some of the questions we get.

You stuck it out, you stayed around, and you're listening. That means a lot more to me than a poor choice of words in your original question. :)

Did I not say this was stress induced... Geez... Guess all my advise gets ignored... :-/

I wondered where/how OP found a trainer? I interviewed a number in my area before I found one who was a good fit. One appeared to have trained as a prison guard; another kept referring to "my babies" (I love them, but at the end of the day they are dogs).

Keep in mind, of course, that Andi and my late husband were jointly and severally banned from PetSmart (I believe both the classes and the store) for life. I believe I was allowed back in - alone.

Keep in mind, of course, that Andi and my late husband were jointly and severally banned from PetSmart (I believe both the classes and the store) for life. I believe I was allowed back in - alone.

That is incredibly funny!

This is a dog that is stressed due to not being able to go outside for "dog" time and an owner that is probably micromanaging him.

I see this all the time.. the dog is neurotic and naughty. The owner is in denial that they are the reason the dog is crazy.

The dog is stressed because the owner created that environment. It is rare that a dog is stressed for no reason.

This is a high energy breed that needs to run.. A LOT! This breed, among others, rare will sit and twiddle their thumbs while you play mommy to 5 kids. He needs a schedule and he needs a strict schedule.

But this post will probably get ignored again haha..

I have to say, despite my reaction to this poster, I do agree with crating. Your dog is now older, so re-training to use the crate will be harder, but crate training is the best thing.

Think of crate training, and crating, this way. In the wild dogs live in dens. A den is a safe place, a place to hide, a place to sleep, eat, and feel safe. To a domesticated dog a crate is like a den. Just because your dog is a pet doesn't mean he doesn't still have wild instincts.

Puppies usually cry when crated not because of the crate, but because they've lost their litter mates, their mom. It's a hard adjustment. Most pet owners give up because puppy is crying, and they think that means puppy hates the crate. That's not the case.

In the wild mommy teaches the babies never to pee in the den. From the first days of their lives they go outside of the den to pee. Of course their den doesn't have a door, so they can choose to leave and pee when they need to. Fact is most dogs (except shelter dogs, and puppymill dogs) won't ever pee or poo in their crate unless they really can't hold it.

The rule for crating (during the day) is one hour/month of age. In other words, a 2 month old puppy should spend no more than 2 hours in the crate during the day without being relieved. That doesn't mean that you can leave a 2 year old dog in the crate for an entire day (being facetious here), but a puppy will need to be relieved, as an older dog (over 2 years of age) can spend a work day in the crate with no accidents (unless there's a medical condition, or other issues).

Boy oh boy, don't get me started, I'll write you a book. :(

I'm hoping he will adjust I know dogs are more adaptable then humans are. I just took it down because I didn't want it to be available for anyone to put him in there when they're stressed out. The other dog doesn't have a crate and he would be in there during dinner while they let their dog lay in the kitchen. I felt sorry for him so since he has been doing OK while we are away (not chewing anything up and no accidents) I took it down to give the dogs the same treatment. I'm hoping he will adapt rather smoothly especially since it hasn't been very long since I took it down.
Also, since I have so many experts here do any of you suggest supplements? I am into holistic medicine and always prefer nutrition over drugs. I know boxers tent to have joint problems. I got him some fish oil because that will help with his joints and brain. I also considered getting glucosamine chroindroitin and an msm formula. Has any of you used supplements for your animals?

That is incredibly funny!

This is a dog that is stressed due to not being able to go outside for "dog" time and an owner that is probably micromanaging him.

I see this all the time.. the dog is neurotic and naughty. The owner is in denial that they are the reason the dog is crazy.

The dog is stressed because the owner created that environment. It is rare that a dog is stressed for no reason.

This is a high energy breed that needs to run.. A LOT! This breed, among others, rare will sit and twiddle their thumbs while you play mommy to 5 kids. He needs a schedule and he needs a strict schedule.

But this post will probably get ignored again haha..

I am sorry I have been responding the best I can. Have you seen the number of post? I also stated I thought it was anxiety related if you did not read that early on. He gets a run four times a week with me and a walk twice a day and out in between. He also goes out to my finances parents once or twice a week to run.. I do believe as I've already stated a dozen times he needs a fence so he can exercise more. I do what I can and probably more than most. He also plays all day with my sisters dog. I am not "playing mommy" to five kids! I am a mom of two young kids and am a very active mom. My sister and her family are struggling for the moment so I welcomed them into my home. I disagree with the twiddling of the thumbs (he doesn't have thumbs) but he does rest when we rest. I have also stated he is usually a very loving and playful dog and gets tons of attention from my "five kids.". I ALSO stated his routine has recently been messed up due to all the new changes. I also have a dislocated jaw and have been under stress. I agree it is anxiety and probably because of his schedule change and my stress and the new dog. Dogs worlds aren't always perfect but I know they are adaptable and only got on here at a very weak moment for some advice. I don't think it's nice to jump in a make snotty remarks. I'm trying I just thanked everyone on here for their help. I'm a so sorry I missed your posts but I probably shouldn't even respond because I'm not here to fight I am actually here because I care about my dog.

I don't want to argue about this any more. A dog who "pees and poops" in the house on a regular basis is not potty trained.

He tries to get in between you and your fiance and he lays in bed on TOP of you - he's running your household. And, yes, I'm the "person" who said that.

Doing tricks and being a dog you can stand to live with are two very different things.

And as far as "I am thankful for all the responses I got. I appreciate it. I just wish some of you would not just jump to conclusion from one thing I said" this is very much like telling a fat girl she doesn't sweat much (for a fat girl).

A simple "thanks" would have sufficed.
I never said he did on a regular basis I said he is potty trained and has been acting out. Out of character because he is potty trained. I am not going to argue this. I did find a trainer who I consulted with and went to see the vet today. He goes everyday all day out of cage in house without having an accident. He goes all night every night with me in my bed or his next to my bed without an accident. This started when my sister moved in, brought a dog in, and my jaw got dislocated, and my fiancé started a new job with long hours, and his routine ( which both vet and trainer agree is most likely his problem) added stress. They said my stress also makes him stressed. I told them both about the alpha thing and the trainer had me do a couple things standing over him and making him ay down and then saying basically down on ground on top and he flipped over. He also had me do a couple other activities with him and it went extremely well. It was just me and him and trainer though no kids running or dogs. He said he doesn't think it's an alpha issue because he clearly submits to me. He gave me some pointers and told me I could come work there with him but if anything I need work calming down because he is a good dog. So, I'm taking the advice of someone who saw me with him today. I was told not to holler at him and use a stern voice instead. I am thankful for your opinions and advice but I think we're going to be fine. Like I've stated before I will work on myself and will continue to work with him. Sorry I don't agree with everything you have posted. I did show this post to both vet and trainer today because I wanted to see what they thought. They think I just ticked a lot of dog lovers off with my opening statement and they can't really help you without seeing you with your dog and not to take it to heart.

I'm glad.

I only suggested re-homing for your sake, and the dogs, because at first I felt you really didn't want the dog.

Like I said, the written word sucks. Sadly that's what we have to work with on this site, and many times we see something, read it, and that's all we can remember, that's all we care about. It can change the way we handle a question. Remember, we're all human, and we volunteer here. We answer questions on the dog forum because we love dogs. When someone says they're not fond of their dog, we go on defense mode. You'll understand when you've been here a while, when you've read some of the questions we get.

You stuck it out, you stayed around, and you're listening. That means a lot more to me than a poor choice of words in your original question. :)
I wear my heart on my sleeve what can I say. I say what I feel at that very moment. I was on the defensive side too. I agree with the main advice given by everyone which I think if I'm correct is I need to change how I am doing things... I am going to try to get back on routine my kids are on a routine too. It has been a lot of changes in a little amount of time and it has affected the whole household.

I'd also rehome the fiance

How much would a fee for something like that be...

[QUOTE=Hennali;3263087]I never said he did on a regular basis I said he is potty trained and has been acting out. Out of character because he is potty trained. I am not going to argue this. I did find a trainer who I consulted with and went to see the vet today. He goes everyday all day out of cage in house without having an accident. He goes all night every night with me in my bed or his next to my bed without an accident. This started when my sister moved in, brought a dog in, and my jaw got dislocated, and my fiancé started a new job with long hours, and his routine ( which both vet and trainer agree is most likely his problem) added stress. They said my stress also makes him stressed. I told them both about the alpha thing and the trainer had me do a couple things standing over him and making him ay down and then saying basically down on ground on top and he flipped over. He also had me do a couple other activities with him and it went extremely well. It was just me and him and trainer though no kids running or dogs. He said he doesn't think it's an alpha issue because he clearly submits to me. He gave me some pointers and told me I could come work there with him but if anything I need work calming down because he is a good dog. So, I'm taking the advice of someone who saw me with him today. I was told not to holler at him and use a stern voice instead. I am thankful for your opinions and advice but I think we're going to be fine. Like I've stated before I will work on myself and will continue to work with him. Sorry I don't agree with everything you have posted. I did show this post to both vet and trainer today because I wanted to see what they thought. They think I just ticked a lot of dog lovers off with my opening statement and they can't really help you without seeing you with your dog and not to take it to heart.[/QUOTE

I did not mean to imply I have not been helped hear because I believe I have. I only meant My vet believes my opening post really made people upset and that it looked like to him that people just automatically assumed I don't deserve my dog. Everything at has been said here I Have and will take into consideration and many I will use. Some I think agreeing to disagree is the best solution because we are going in circles and you haven't seen me with my dog and I think that is important before deciding my dog is running my household. He lays on me because he loves me when I say move he moves when I say off he gets off the bed. He listens. He has had some recent out of his character issues and I didn't understand it. But he is potty trained. This is a stress issue IMO. You know humans bowels sometimes go nuts when they are stressed. Some doctors think iBS and many other GI issues are because of stress. I think a dog could have this issue as well. Maybe I'm wrong but I know he is potty trained so I'm sorry I disagree.

I wear my heart on my sleeve what can I say. I say what I feel at that very moment. I was on the defensive side too. I agree with the main advice given by everyone which I think if I'm correct is I need to change how I am doing things...I am going to try to get back on routine my kids are on a routine too. It has been a lot of changes in a little amount of time and it has affected the whole household.

Dogs do react to change. Dogs need a schedule, they thrive on things remaining the same. A sudden change can affect them, and their training.

So yes, you do need to change what you're doing with the dog. You also have to stop feeling the hate towards the dog. Not always easy, but it's obvious that you do love the dog, and that means a lot. Love can cure a lot.

If you're willing to put in the time, and suffer through the times that it doesn't work, accept that he won't get it instantly, and accept that he is a dog, not a human, then you'll make it work.

Go back to basics. Potty train all over again, go for walks, praise when he's good, a firm no, and nothing else when he's bad. Lots of affection, and lots of positive reinforcement. If you do that, you'll form a bond that no one can break.

Dogs are pack animals. They love to be with their pack. You are a member of your dogs pack. You can either be the dominant dog, or the outcast. It's really you choice, and it really depends on how much time and effort you're wiling to spend on this.

If you make a mistake, don't dwell on it, just move on. I can promise that your dog isn't dwelling on that mistake, he's just waiting for the here and now. Dogs live in the moment. They forgive very easily, otherwise there would be no way to rehabilitate dogs that are abused.

Today is a new day. Go and meet your dog, and start fresh. I'm sure he's ready and willing to soak up everything you're willing to teach him. :)

Dogs do react to change. Dogs need a schedule, they thrive on things remaining the same. A sudden change can affect them, and their training.

So yes, you do need to change what you're doing with the dog. You also have to stop feeling the hate towards the dog. Not always easy, but it's obvious that you do love the dog, and that means a lot. Love can cure a lot.

If you're willing to put in the time, and suffer through the times that it doesn't work, accept that he won't get it instantly, and accept that he is a dog, not a human, then you'll make it work.

Go back to basics. Potty train all over again, go for walks, praise when he's good, a firm no, and nothing else when he's bad. Lots of affection, and lots of positive reinforcement. If you do that, you'll form a bond that no one can break.

Dogs are pack animals. They love to be with their pack. You are a member of your dogs pack. You can either be the dominant dog, or the outcast. It's really you choice, and it really depends on how much time and effort you're wiling to spend on this.

If you make a mistake, don't dwell on it, just move on. I can promise that your dog isn't dwelling on that mistake, he's just waiting for the here and now. Dogs live in the moment. They forgive very easily, otherwise there would be no way to rehabilitate dogs that are abused.

Today is a new day. Go and meet your dog, and start fresh. I'm sure he's ready and willing to soak up everything you're willing to teach him. :)

I really appreciate your help. I will take it. Thank you. I don't know that I will be back because of the post "I should rehome my fiancé". I have come here for advice and have tried to thank everyone and move forward. However, that statement was clearly out of line and impossible to make that conclusion with the few things I have said. I don't think she should be allowed to volunteer here because her words are very hurtful and she just doesn't back down. I attempted to say thank you and end on a good note but she just keeps going. I don't know if she is a volunteer but she is extremely judgmental and over the Internet with no reason for an outrageous remark like that. Thank you Alty!

First off, I wasn't quoting YOU, I qouted Judy. I only responded ONE time in this thread. Anger issues? Me? Not at all. I'm not angry about anything....yet....

I can see you are a very emotional woman. Considering you have children, two jobs, and nursing school, perhaps finding a new home for your dog is a better option...
I wasn't directing this towards you at all. I may wear my heart on my sleeve but that remark by her was very insulting. I am not an overly emotional person I say what's on my mind but I would never tell someone they should rehome their fiancé from an Internet site. That is ridiculous she has no right to judge me and I haven't said enough to give any impression he is a bad guy. I have time at home and as I stated before there are normally people here if it's not me it's someone and a dog. I'm good with the advice I've been given but geesh if you aren't a therapist and haven't even met me don't make a remark like that.

I agree it is anxiety and probably because of his schedule change and my stress and the new dog. Dogs worlds aren't always perfect but I know they are adaptable and only got on here at a very weak moment for some advice.

It's a proven fact that dogs who are in stable environments with rock steady schedules, are more accepting of change.

You blame everyone for your dog acting out.. He is a horrible beast, yet you defend everything he does.

Bad dogs are bad dogs.. and some dogs need extra attention in a healthy way.

I own sporting dogs.. and a run 4 times a week with bad behaviors appearing is not enough. Many people think that walking a dog is enough. I believe it is healthy for a dog to just run and be free (in an enclosed area, of course).

You're dog obviously cannot handle stress very well.. and teaching him "sit" isn't going to do it.

Have you spoke to your vet about anxiety medicine? You can also give melatonin to help calm him down. 3mg three times a day should work OK. Melatonin has less side effects than the prescription drugs. If melatonin doesn't agree with your dog, it'll just make him sleepy, not aggressive.

If you do not see any changes in your home soon, I would seriously consider re-homing him. He cannot handle the home you have created for him. That is no fault of yours either. Some dogs simply cannot accept change... no matter how hard you try to make transitions easy.

That's another thing you need to accept. This dog is acting out because something is missing in your home. What that is.. no one can tell you. If you cannot figure it out, than he needs a home that can provide to him. That is called a life change and it happens to all of us. Most people own dogs and they are just that, a dog. They are loved and taken care of.. but mental health is very lacking along with socializing. Once your life changes, the dogs cannot handle it.. and they act out like yours is. Is he being mean and doing it on purpose? No! Stop thinking like that.. he is a dog... and he is acting like a dog and dogs act like this when there is something MAJOR missing in the structure of the "pack".

This is not a personal attack on you.. You are probably a great home and I'm sure you are trying your hardest to satisfy him.. but its apparent you cant. Stop taking everything as a personal attack. We respond to what you write.. and one post he is the best dog ever, the next post he is a jerk...

What I would suggest.. is for your to get him out.. Let him be a dog EVERY DAY. Increase his exercise.. He needs to be tired.. Tired dogs are happy, good dogs. Anxiety drops and they are less on edge.

You need to create a stable environment for your dog, and somewhere along the road, that left. Maybe you are going to have to start from ground zero. Maybe this is just a period where you just need to stick it out and deal with him and his annoying behaviors... Maybe he needs to live with someone else.. Maybe he needs medicine to help him out.

I really appreciate your help. I will take it. Thank you. I don't know that I will be back because of the post "I should rehome my fiancé". I have come here for advice and have tried to thank everyone and move forward. However, that statement was clearly out of line and impossible to make that conclusion with the few things I have said. I don't think she should be allowed to volunteer here because her words are very hurtful and she just doesn't back down. I attempted to say thank you and end on a good note but she just keeps going. I don't know if she is a volunteer but she is extremely judgmental and over the Internet with no reason for an outrageous remark like that. Thank you Alty!

NOBODY said you said those words. You have been antagonistic with Judy from the beginning. I read this whole entire cry baby story, and quite frankly, it is YOU that has an attitude with the members. Judy is a well respected member on this site, and when you post on a Q A site, be prepared for all types of advice.

Ok I don't know when the statement "I'd also rehome the fiancé" was posted bc I just saw this but that is completely out of line. Who are you to judge? You have done nothing but pick my words apart and I tried to end on a good note but you just can't let it go. Just because someone doesn't agree with you doesn't give you the right to say awful things. You don't know my fiancé he is a great man. He is the best man I have ever met in my entire life. I don't come from an abusive home I know a good man from a bad man. How dare you! I think you have some anger issues and probably are not the best person to be giving advice. I don't see how you can assume from what I have posted that he should be rehomed. Frankly, I shouldn't care but that's my family and I don't take those things lightly. Please stop responding to my post.
Also, I tried to find the original post I couldn't find it. By stating the statement I was insulted by I figured you would get I wasn't directing that towards you. I will be more specific next time.

Its a proven fact that dogs who are in stable environments with rock steady schedules, are more accepting of change.

You blame everyone for your dog acting out.. He is a horrible beast, yet you defend everything he does.

Bad dogs are bad dogs.. and some dogs need extra attention in a healthy way.

I own sporting dogs.. and a run 4 times a week with bad behaviors appearing is not enough. Many people think that walking a dog is enough. I believe it is healthy for a dog to just run and be free (in an enclosed area, of course).

You're dog obviously cannot handle stress very well.. and teaching him "sit" isnt going to do it.

Have you spoke to your vet about anxiety medicine? You can also give melatonin to help calm him down. 3mg three times a day should work ok. Melatonin has less side effects than the prescription drugs. If melatonin doesnt agree with your dog, it'll just make him sleepy, not aggressive.

If you do not see any changes in your home soon, I would seriously consider re-homing him. He cannot handle the home you have created for him. That is no fault of yours either. Some dogs simply cannot accept change... no matter how hard you try to make transitions easy.

Thats another thing you need to accept. This dog is acting out because something is missing in your home. What that is.. no one can tell you. If you cannot figure it out, than he needs a home that can provide to him. That is called a life change and it happens to all of us. Most people own dogs and they are just that, a dog. They are loved and taken care of.. but mental health is very lacking along with socializing. Once your life changes, the dogs cannot handle it.. and they act out like yours is. Is he being mean and doing it on purpose? No! Stop thinking like that.. he is a dog... and he is acting like a dog and dogs act like this when there is something MAJOR missing in the structure of the "pack".

This is not a personal attack on you.. You are probably a great home and I'm sure you are trying your hardest to satisfy him.. but its apparent you cant. Stop taking everything as a personal attack. We respond to what you write.. and one post he is the best dog ever, the next post he is a jerk...

What I would suggest.. is for your to get him out.. Let him be a dog EVERY DAY. Increase his exercise.. He needs to be tired.. Tired dogs are happy, good dogs. Anxiety drops and they are less on edge.

You need to create a stable environment for your dog, and somewhere along the road, that left. Maybe you are going to have to start from ground zero. Maybe this is just a period of time where you just need to stick it out and deal with him and his annoying behaviors... Maybe he needs to live with someone else.. Maybe he needs medicine to help him out.
I haven't defended what he has done that's why I'm here. I don't agree with some advice but just like everything else that advice may not be what's right for my dog. Idk if you read everything but I have tried to let it be known his positive characteristics because my main post was negative. He is a happy dog. We had an excellent day. He does run openly and free so there is one day a week maybe two that he doesn't get to run some. Some with me others t my finances land. All breeds are different. Dogs are all different. I will not give him melatonin because it's a hormone and he is too young to be deficient and I don't want to screw his hormones up when they probably work fine. I have homeopathic remedies for him. I will not give him drugs. Nutrition and exercise I think is the key to most issues. I think the changes that have occurred are what has caused stress in the entire household because as I've said it is a newly developed issue that does not happen everyday. Today I spent the day with him all day and with all that attention he is great. He doesn't just "sit" he listens he plays etc... I was defensive because I made a horrible mistake by posting in my first post I can't stand my dog. That has never left the minds of any poster. I knew the minute I received the first response I was in trouble. But no one wanted to look at any thing other than I'm a bad owner and need to re home him. I don't think you can make that decision over one post. As I stated in a few posts ago I took him to a trainer today for a consult and I took him to the vet. Both of them read this post and said my dog is doing great. My vet keeps him while I go on vacation so he knows him. The trainer had me do a few things with him to make surfeit wasn't an alpha thing and it's not. I know I need a fence I do what I can. I think if my original post would have included some nicer words and less negative ones this would have went better. But I tired to make up for it. My dog is where he needs to be. I am here as I've said so many times because I care and I want to fix this newly developed issue.

Guys, I don't want to start a fight, but can we please get back on track?

Yes, the OP had a rocky start, she wrote a post and worded it badly, to the point were many of us saw red. We all know how ridiculous the written word is.

She was raked over the coals and then some, but came back, listened to the advice, is willing to work with her dog, and eager to learn more. I'm willing to give her more advice. If any of you aren't, that's fine, that's your prerogative, but please, stop putting a stoke in the wheel when there's someone willing to teach the person to ride.

You all know how much you mean to me, but I'm getting mad here. I'm willing to help the OP, but every time I get somewhere someone comes on and posts something about the original post, starts a spat, and everything I'm trying to do gets thrown under the bus.

If you're all upset with the OP that's your right, and I would urge you to either report the posts that made you upset, or PM the OP, but please, can we get back to the dog and how to fix this issue?

Clunk, off my soapbox. Alty is now waiting for the fit to hit the shan. :(

NOBODY said you said those words. You have been antagonistic with Judy from the beginning. I read this whole entire cry baby story, and quite frankly, it is YOU that has an attitude with the members. Judy is a well respected member on this site, and when you post on a Q A site, be prepared for all types of advice.
Ok I know I didn't say those words what are you talking about? I believe it was originally posted by her. Its uncalled for of course I'm going to get ticked off by that. QUIT YELLING! I don't think I was anymore on the defense with her than she was because the first response was picking my words apart and she kept quoting and basically never giving me any training techniques. If it's a crybaby story wth are you here responding and not advising? I tried to say thank you and move on I even read her really sad story about ANSI it brought tears to my eyes. But that was rude and never should have been posted.

Guys, I don't want to start a fight, but can we please get back on track?

Yes, the OP had a rocky start, she wrote a post and worded it badly, to the point were many of us saw red. We all know how ridiculous the written word is.

She was raked over the coals and then some, but came back, listened to the advice, is willing to work with her dog, and eager to learn more. I'm willing to give her more advice. If any of you aren't, that's fine, that's your prerogative, but please, stop putting a stoke in the wheel when there's someone willing to teach the person to ride.

You all know how much you mean to me, but I'm getting mad here. I'm willing to help the OP, but every time I get somewhere someone comes on and posts something about the original post, starts a spat, and everything I'm trying to do gets thrown under the bus.

If you're all upset with the OP that's your right, and I would urge you to either report the posts that made you upset, or PM the OP, but please, can we get back to the dog and how to fix this issue?

Clunk, off my soapbox. Alty is now waiting for the fit to hit the shan. :(

I'm done for the night was supposed to be two hours ago:/. I would love to work with you. Is there a way I can just do that?

. I will not give him melatonin because it's a hormone and he is too young to be deficient and I don't want to screw his hormones up when they probably work fine.

Yes, it is a hormone, however; it will not "screw" him up. It might actually make him a better dog.. But if you feel as if you can work around this without medications, go for it.

Yes, dogs are different personalities, and all breeds have different characteristics.. but you can do a pretty good job at grouping them together. I'm not sure where you were going with that, but an athletic dog is an athletic dog. We purchase purebred dogs because you have a good guarantee of personality and traits. So, when I mention I own sporting dogs.. they are high energy dogs that need to run.. when my old girl was young, she ran 5-10 miles a day.. if she missed a day, she was destructive and needy. After her run, she was level headed and workable. So when I mention things, its from experience.. not a guess.

My mom runs a rescue for German pointers (sporting breed), and all our dogs go into homes where they are exercised and ran until they drop. It's a must. If not, the dogs turn into problems, kind of like what you are describing.. Great dogs.. but destructive and naughty.

I think if you increased his exercise every day, these problems would start to go away. Do you live close to any BLM land? Or open space? Does he have a good recall? If so.. take him out there and make him RUN...

I just think that is his problem. I know you are getting him out, I don't need you to repeat that.. You've said it many times.. but with him getting out, and the increased stress in your home.. he needs to get out more and be tired.

I just fail to believe that obedience is what your dog needs. He knows it.. he does fine for you.. so why waste your time? I think that if he is not in sight, he should go in his crate.. but than again, if he is exhausted tired, he may not care if he is sleeping all day in a crate.

After your walk/runs, does he lay out flat and sleep for the rest of the day? If not, he needs more exercise.

I'm really going to push for increased exercise. Just try it and see if he changes any.

Yes, it is a hormone, however; it will not "screw" him up. It might actually make him a better dog.. But if you feel as if you can work around this without medications, go for it.

Yes, dogs are different personalities, and all breeds have different characteristics.. but you can do a pretty good job at grouping them together. I'm not sure where you were going with that, but an athletic dog is an athletic dog. We purchase purebred dogs because you have a good guarantee of personality and traits. So, when I mention I own sporting dogs.. they are high energy dogs that need to run.. when my old girl was young, she ran 5-10 miles a day.. if she missed a day, she was destructive and needy. After her run, she was level headed and workable. So when I mention things, its from experience.. not a guess.

My mom runs a rescue for German pointers (sporting breed), and all our dogs go into homes where they are exercised and ran until they drop. Its a must. If not, the dogs turn into problems, kind of like what you are describing.. Great dogs.. but destructive and naughty.

I think if you increased his exercise every day, these problems would start to go away. Do you live close to any BLM land? Or open space? Does he have a good recall? If so.. take him out there and make him RUN...

I just think that is his problem. I know you are getting him out, I dont need you to repeat that.. You've said it many times.. but with him getting out, and the increased stress in your home.. he needs to get out more and be tired.

I just fail to believe that obedience is what your dog needs. He knows it.. he does fine for you.. so why waste your time? I think that if he is not in sight, he should go in his crate.. but than again, if he is exhausted tired, he may not care if he is sleeping all day in a crate.

After your walk/runs, does he lay out flat and sleep for the rest of the day? If not, he needs more exercise.

I'm really going to push for increased exercise. Just try it and see if he changes any.

I will try my best. We are in the process of getting a fence but it will be a couple months. We have land down at our cabin but can only make it there on the weekends. Nicks parents have land too but we have only been able to make it a couple days a week. He will rest and sleep when I do. He actually won't leave the room unless we do. If I'm sick he will literally only leave to pee and maybe get a bone. I will try to fit some extra running time in. I used to have a lot of help but nick got a new job and they are working him to death. So I have to fit what the kids needs and dog and sometimes there isn't time. However I don't think he's miserable and he shouldn't be here because he can't run everyday. Exercise does help my stress so if it's stress then I agree it would help. The melatonin thing I don't know I'm in the holistic field and working toward holistic nursing and work at a health store. I have always been told by the naturopaths it's not smart for kids they actually took it off the shelves. So maybe being a dog it's OK I will ask one of them this week.

Did I not say this was stress induced... Geez... Guess all my advise gets ignored ... :-/


I actually your lips moving and heard what you said. I never understand how/why one person (and, in your case, licensed) is ignored and someone new gets applause.

Go figure!

They think I just ticked a lot of dog lovers off with my opening statement and they can't really help you without seeing you with your dog and not to take it to heart.


Then I would assume you are going to stop posting? Why is "seeing a dog" that is "pooping and peeing" in the house necessary. Seems pretty clear cut to me.

At any rate I also took my puppy into the Vet today and asked him if dogs hold grudges, have human emotions. He said no. I know you don't believe that.

He DID say that he sees dogs all the time that become un-housebroken or choose to "pee and poop" in front of the owner for the attention or because of stress. Then the owner pays more attention, does whatever reassures the dog, and the problem stops.

He DID say that he sees dogs all the time that become un-housebroken or choose to "pee and poop" in front of the owner for the attention or because of stress. Then the owner pays more attention, does whatever reassures the dog, and the problem stops.

Dogs that start acting out for attention is the worse! They love attention and will feed off both negative and positive. So really the only way to solve the problem is to ignore the bad behavior and really praise the good.. Most owners are not disciplined enough to do that. :(

The melatonin thing idk I'm in the holistic field and working toward holistic nursing and work at a health store. I have always been told by the naturopaths it's not smart for kids they actually took it off the shelves. So maybe being a dog it's ok I will ask one of them this week.

I am not big on pushing drugs, but if it comes down to a dog keeping his home and allowing the owners to not stress over the dog, its worth it. Especially if this upturn in your home is temporary. I am all for fixing the problem, not covering it up.

A majority of vets do not know behavior and can tell you how to fix it. There are some out there specialized in behavior, but its typically more alphabets behind their name. So to ask a vet about complex behavior problems, they will typically push a pill.

Give it the good college with increased exercise as much as you possibly can and see where he is by next Saturday.

How much would a fee for something like that be.....


Depends on whether he's neutered or the new owner has to pay for the surgery.

... The melatonin thing idk I'm in the holistic field and working toward holistic nursing and work at a health store. I have always been told by the naturopaths it's not smart for kids they actually took it off the shelves. So maybe being a dog it's ok I will ask one of them this week.


Now this interests me - there's a degree in holistic nursing? That's something I've never heard before.

Where would a holistic nurse work?