View Full Version : Problems with girlfriend
oneg88
Aug 24, 2012, 04:37 PM
Hello everyone.. (:
I have two main problems with my girlfriend..
We both at the age of 16, I am her first boyfriend.
She is shy, childish and insecure.. her family isn't religious but her parents educated her to modesty like not wearing exposed clothing and stuff.. I liked it at first, I felt like I found a cute girl, different from most girls, dressing inappropriate.. our top intimacy is like cuddling and kissing.. we date for 8 months and she's kind of overreacting with this thing.. she doesn't let me put my hands on her buttock, if I do that she immideately stops the kissing and gives me a bad look wich makes me feel bad.. I get horny sometimes and I really want to take it to the next level, it doesn't have to be sex, just touch each other more, she like NEVER gets horny and I feel terrible about it... ):
My other problem is, almost every time we go out together I do not really enjoy.. we don't have the same sense of humor, she laughs at my jokes but I'm not laughing at her jokes.. it just lost its fun..
I talked about this with many of my friends and MOST of them told me to break up with her.. but I don't know, I just can't... she really loves me, I can't do it to her, I can't do it to myself. I'm sure that once I leave her, I'll regret it so much... I can not do this because I love her so much and I love to make her feel good and buy her things, she's the kind of person that deserves to be loved and treated well and it's fun for me to know that I am the person that makes it happen..
I just don't know what to do, I am so confused lately... please give me some advices.. thank you all guys..!
(sorry if there were any mistakes with my english.. )
braindamage
Aug 24, 2012, 05:29 PM
Ask yourself do you guys really connect? Think of it this way you're her first boyfriend.. only her first. So maybe she loves the idea of you more than anything else. At that age no matter what girls always love there first boyfriends.. buut that's only cause she's hasn't experienced any other relationships. Honestly, if you guys break up you she will be fine and you will be fine. Because you have so much time to find someone who connects with you on a emotinal and physical level.
Then again maybe she's just new to this. Either way you should talk to her. Tell her how you feel that she doesn't show affection and all that jazz. If she doesn't understand and what not than seriously your both better off. Don't forget your still young and have all the time in the world to find that special someone.
oneg88
Aug 24, 2012, 05:40 PM
Ask yourself do you guys really connect? Think of it this way your her first bf..only her first. So maybe she loves the idea of you more than anything else. At that age no matter what girls always love there first boyfriends..buut thats only cause shes hasnt experienced any other relationships. Honestly, if you guys break up you she will be fine and you will be fine. Because you have so much time to find someone who connects with you on a emotinal and physical level.
Then again maybe shes just new to this. Either way you should talk to her. Tell her how you feel that she doesnt show affection and all that jazz. If she doesnt understand and what not than seriously your both better off. Dont forget your still young and have all the time in the world to find that special someone.
Hey thank you for your comment..
Well.. I do not feel so comfortable talking to her about that sexuality thing.. is there a way I can get her into it? And what should I say to her? Otherwise I feel our relationship is falling apart because she can not provide me with my needs.. /:
lisaboo55
Aug 24, 2012, 07:16 PM
I think you should really think about your decision before you do something rash. If you do really like her you should stay with her but if you feel you wouldn't mind not to have her in your life you should let her go. As for the sex/touching thing she is probably nervous and maybe not ready for it. You are her first boyfriend so she's most likely a virgin and not used to that kind of attention. Talk to her about it say something like l feel that I'm ready to take our relationship to the next level how do you feel about it. Something along those lines you know. Also what is she insecure about her looks or your relationship or what.
oneg88
Aug 25, 2012, 02:54 AM
I think you should really think about your decision before you do something rash. If you do really like her you should stay with her but if you feel you wouldn't mind not to have her in your life you should let her go. As for the sex/touching thing she is probably nervous and maybe not ready for it. You are her first boyfriend so she's most likely a virgin and not used to that kind of attention. Talk to her about it say something like l feel that I'm ready to take our relationship to the next level how do you feel about it. Something along those lines you know. Also what is she insecure about her looks or your relationship or what.
Thank you.. there was that one time, I don't remember what we were texting about exactly but she was like "i don't mind seeing you without a shirt(;" and I replied "haha, same((:" and she wrote "hmmm okay..(: not going to happen, sorry". That moment I realized she is just too innocent and that we will never move to that 'next level', since this text, I can't even imagine her taking her shirt off when she is with me. I start to fantasize about her and then I feel kind of sick and immediately stop, because I know it will never happen, and I am a teenager, with how much I love her, I also need to satisfy my sexual needs, I can get it from other girls, but on the other hand I'm afraid to lose her.. please help guys...
JudyKayTee
Aug 25, 2012, 05:33 AM
Thank you.. there was that one time, i don't remember what we were texting about exactly but she was like "i don't mind seeing you without a shirt(;" and i replied "haha, same((:" and she wrote "hmmm okay..(: not going to happen, sorry". That moment i realized she is just too innocent and that we will never move to that 'next level', since this text, i can't even imagine her taking her shirt off when she is with me. i start to fantasize about her and then I feel kind of sick and immediately stop, because i know it will never happen, and i am a teenager, with how much i love her, i also need to satisfy my sexual needs, i can get it from other girls, but on the other hand i'm afraid to lose her.. please help guys....
Do we know how old you are?
lisaboo55
Aug 25, 2012, 10:26 AM
Thank you.. there was that one time, i don't remember what we were texting about exactly but she was like "i don't mind seeing you without a shirt(;" and i replied "haha, same((:" and she wrote "hmmm okay..(: not going to happen, sorry". That moment i realized she is just too innocent and that we will never move to that 'next level', since this text, i can't even imagine her taking her shirt off when she is with me. i start to fantasize about her and then I feel kind of sick and immediately stop, because i know it will never happen, and i am a teenager, with how much i love her, i also need to satisfy my sexual needs, i can get it from other girls, but on the other hand i'm afraid to lose her.. please help guys....
Well you both are very young. You guys have plenty of time. I do how ever think that if you don't want to leave her don't. She will be ready sometime I say you should definitely talk to her to see were she stands on this subject. Communication is very important as you get older you'll need this skill and it will take a little time to learn it. The best time to start is now just talk to her and see were she stands.
Cat1864
Aug 25, 2012, 11:36 AM
You are 16 years old. She is 16 years old. We cannot give you advice on how to get your underage girlfriend to satisfy your sexual needs.
We do not know where you live and if sexual contact of any type between you might be considered illegal. The laws vary from place to place.
That said, you don't seem happy in the relationship in the first place. You don't have the same (or close enough) senses of humor. You don't enjoy going out with her and spending time with her. So why are you? You say it is love, but sounds more like you are sending yourself on a guilt trip.
Yes, she deserves to be loved. So do you. It doesn't mean that you are compatible enough to love each other as anything more than friends.
Don't stay with her out of a sense of obligation. Don't stay with her because giving her things makes her happy. If you stay, do so because you enjoy being with her and having fun together.
oneg88
Aug 25, 2012, 01:17 PM
Thank you all guys seriously..
Cat1864 - it's totally legal no worries..
And... I think I am going to stay with her for a few more days even a month.. I'll see what happens, if things are working out I will keep on that relationship.. If not I guess I'll just break up with her... I don't see other option
JudyKayTee
Aug 25, 2012, 01:37 PM
Thank you all guys seriously..
Cat1864 - it's totally legal no worries..
And... I think i am going to stay with her for a few more days even a month.. I'll see what happens, if things are working out i will keep on that relationship.. If not i guess i'll just break up with her... I don't see other option
I'd do her a favor - if it's all about sex for you, leave now.