[paragraphs have been created and many caps added -WG]

OK so here is my story...

About a year ago, I worked for an escort agency. I used to drive different girls to jobs and take them home. One day I picked up two girls and went to drop one to a job.. While waiting for one of the girls in the job, me and the other girl sat and talked.. I began to feel something I can't explain, felt like this girl is amazing. It reminded me of a lost princess who needed my help to show her a new life. We just talked and talked and laughed and I could really feel both of us falling for each other. We talked about what we wanted from life and found that we shared the same goals in life.

Later that night I had to take her to a job. Then it hit me how strong my feelings were for her. As I drove her to the job, I was wishing the job would be cancelled. My prayers were answered and it was. We got to talk more. I can't tell you how happy I felt. As the night went on, I knew it was only a matter of time before I had another call for her. I did and this time it wasn't to be cancelled. I sat for two hours on my own with thoughts of despair of what she's doing. I questioned myself as to why I felt the way I do.

I don't know this girl I kept thinking. Why am I bothered? Then it hit me like a brick to the face. I loved her. As corny and silly as it sounds, I had fallen for her. I remember getting the call to pick her up and I was so happy I raced to get to her like her life was at risk. And when she saw me she knew.

The rest of the night was like a nightmare--had to take her to 2 other jobs. I held my emotions back, but I knew by the end of the night she would be mine and I'd take her away from this dark and nasty life.

The end of our shift came and it's 7 in the morning. We're driving home. I drop one of the girls home and it's just me and her in the car. I look at her and say, "Fancy breakfast?" "Yes!" so we go to Macdonalds to eat. We talk. Then I look at her and say, "I like you...i like you a lot and can't stop myself from kissing you." She looked at me and said she likes me too. I remember rubbing her nose with mine just before we kissed, and I held her head and kissed her with all the love in the world. We both knew what we had just found.

I drove to a hotel. We stayed and made love all day. She promised me from that day she would quit working and we would stay in touch. What happened next was a roller coaster of emotions and events that I knew would eventually bring us to breaking point.

The day after, I sat and thought about this girl and her past and if I could ever handle the things she has done for money and if I could ever put this in the past. I knew from past experience my ex gfs' pasts have always been an issue for me to deal with. I gave up my fight to deal with it and sent her a text saying it was too hard for me to deal with. I asked her to call our boss and make sure I don't have to drive her again. She didn't make that call and the following week I had to drive her again.

I remembered that pain of driving her to jobs and the pain that I had let her down and never took her away. I felt awful. I saw the pain in her eyes as she went into jobs wishing I would drive her somewhere else. The end of the night when I dropped her home, I was so angry and shouted at her!

That was the last time I spoke to her.. Every day for a month she would ring me, apologising, crying. I ignored it all until one day I sat there crying thinking what have I done? So I rang her. I said come over and let's do this. I can't still remember the look in her eyes as we kissed. I was the happiest man in the world, and I just held her as we both cried and said that we love each other.

Four days we stayed in a hotel after that. She changed her number, and we promised to be together. As time went on and we started to do normal things. The thoughts of her past kept coming back to me causing us to have arguments. We had good days and some bad days.

Then about 2 months down the line, she moved into my home I lived in with my parents. She fell pregnant, had an abortion, then fell pregnant again. This time there was no option for an abortion, and we were about to be parents. I was so scared and not ready for this and my actions I can only describe as pathetic and weak. I never realised how much of a blessing having a baby was and I think I realised too late.

As time went on, I grew to put aside my feelings and try to support her the best I could. My parents were selling the house and I knew that I'd be moving into a flat with her and the baby. My parents moved far from London to Yorkshire, and we stayed at her mum's until she gave birth--and to be honest with you, the thought of my mum living so far away affected me in ways I can't explain and contributed along with my own insecurities as to what happened next.

So the day came when we were driving to the hospital. Five days of labour and our little boy was born. The feelings I had when I saw his little face! I touched my nose on his and was immediately filled with a joy and happiness that only a father can feel. I knew that day I'd have done anything for that boy and be his daddy and always support his mummy. I think I even loved her even more for giving me such a beautiful son.

Then the arguments started. It started with my family--why they were not there to support me through being a father, why they were not there to see their grandson--so many arguments--argued over his name which was the final straw for her. She ended it and then I was doomed to a life of complete misery. I begged her to forgive me but she wouldn't.

I was now homeless with no girlfriend and no chance of seeing my son as she wouldn't let me. I was staying at a friend's house and hit the drink hard! I went on dating sites to try and get some rationality for what I had done but the story gets worse.

She had access to all my emails, and she read everything! And in the vulnerable state she was in told me I can never see my son again. She registered him and didn't put me on the birth certificate, also never gave him my family name.

I don't want to take her to court. I know all the rules of this justice system and I was not about to drag her and my son through this. I don't want that legal battle only to get access once a week. That would drive me insane. Every night I'd cry myself to sleep and wake up in a cold sweat, shaking, with thoughts of suicide often coming into my head.

I've now started to make plans to end my life. It's been 4 months since he was born and nearly 3 months since we split. I've not found anywhere to live, and my life feels empty and pointless without her. I am stuck with the feelings that I can't move on without her.

She has now found a new partner and it's killing me even more that I've lost the one thing in this life I loved and cared about--and hearing that she has moved on with someone else destroys my hope of getting back with her evermore far away.

The only good thing is 2 days ago I got to meet up with her. We took our son to the park, then to the doctor's, and I can honestly say it was the best day I have had in 4 months. True love does exist, but it must be perfect. When it fails, it fails hard because the higher you take your emotions, the higher they have to fall when they go bad.

I ruined a perfect relationship that was a fairytale story of romance that led into selfish feelings of greed and jealousy, standing on the edge of a high place wanting to jump. How can I go on knowing what I've done? Maybe someone has the answer--or maybe there isn't one. All I'm sure of is the love for her and my son and that if I don't get them back, I won't be able to live with myself for being so stupid. I can't accept it's over, don't think I ever will.

When I dropped her home, I played our song to her and explained everything to her. I told her how important it is for me to be a father, but she's told me there's no hope for us getting back together. Too much has happened. I disagree and I'm stuck wanting my fairytale princess back.

That is what's called a 'wall of text'. Many like myself won't bother to read it.

If you can reformat it with paragraphs that would be helpful.

Sorry I just wrote it all out... sorry it's a bit of a head ache

the best thing I've read in a long time : https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/relationships/what-did-learn-after-devastating-breakup-510427.html

1. There is no such thing as meant to be, the one, true love, or soul mates. There is only the love that you work hard for with your significant other. That in itself, is real love.

2. Love does not simply fall into place, that is infatuation. Love takes hard work, and as soon as one fails to do so, it will crumble as a whole.

3. Communication and honesty are the key foundations to a loving relationship. Both must be present or all will fail.

4. If you are not focused on your significant other for companionship, you are cheating. If you feel the need to hide your conversations with another man from your partner, you are cheating.

5. When looking for a life partner, search for compatibility instead of acceptability

6. You can't try to change a person to someone you want, you must accept the person for who they are. You can only change yourself.

7. Aim to strive for a better you, but don't let another person change who you are.

8. NEVER EVER pressure or guilt your loved one into doing something they don't want to. Do not emotionally blackmail them by making them feel guilty.

9. Do not let your partner become like your mom. Some of them like to do that and it's up to you to know when the line is crossed.

10. Do not backtrack, keep pushing forward or you'll end up in a non productive circle. Accept the truth for what it is and stop giving yourself false hope. When the relationship has ended, you must not dwell in the past.

11. Having a sense of humor is a good thing in general and for a relationship. However, know when you are crossing the line between humor and insensitivity.

12. They might expect you to know what they are thinking without having to tell you, so keep this in mind and pay attention to what they say, their attitude and their actions.

13. When the times are tough, your family and friends are always there for you. Remember what they have done during the hard times and keep them in your heart always.

14. Do not build your life around the person you love and vice versa. Have them a part of your life but do not make them your life.

15. When you love and accept reality, you will be forced to move on without the bitterness within. Strive for this.

16. Take responsibility for your feelings and the actions you make.

17. If you know for sure that the relationship will be going no where, it's better to end it sooner than later.

18. Do not look for a rebound after a serious relationship has ended. It's unhealthy for you, unfair to the rebound, and disrespectful to the ex.

19. Cut all ties and avoid contact for your own sake. NC is the way to go after a break up.

20. Eat right, sleep well, and work out to get ripped after a break up. You will feel so much better about yourself and will take your shirt off at every given chance^^

You drove around call girls, you fell in love with one, got her pregnant. Right there I can understand why your parents might not be so forthcoming with their support. I hope you can see that. We don't know what the arguments were about but they obviously were enough to make get want to cut you out off her life.
Is that a pretty good resumé?

Yes... pretty good observation... I'm stuck with the regrets of what I done and lost something I was truly in love with...

I lost it when you fell madly in love yet told her you couldn't deal with it and ordered her to make sure you weren't the driver. How selfish, how demanding, how dare you draw us into the drama of love and then slam us (her) with that. The rest is all downhill. Especially expecting parents to support you. You sound about 19 going on 12.

And your title is not only not true, it certainly doesn't describe you

Yes I know the mistakes I made.. don't u think I've been in a state ever since...

I'm actually 31.

'True love does exist,. '
Hype, meaningless. Good love is love in which everyone involved is as happy as the other(s).

'... but it must be perfect.' More hype, more meaningless. Perfect? Never. Love is accepting the whole package, what you like, what you don't like, and making daily adjustments to various compromises with the one you love.

You are full of sayings and platitudes and aphorisms. You have no clue. Please dump the list and look at yourself without words.

I don't understand your reply

What I'm saying: you are trying to come up with 'sayings' to run your life.
I picked one, 'True love exists but it must be perfect' as the most meaningless.
You need to stop all these ideas of lofty truths.
Your choices, your actions, are what define your life, not a bunch of sayings that don't apply to anything real.
Love is just simply not 'perfect.' Nothing we humans do is perfect. Even a flower can be different from another one of the same species, so which one is perfect? And you can say that both are beautiful and thus perfect, and in your eyes, they are. And the philosophical discussion continues.

But love has nothing to do with perfection. Love is a constant series of little pains and joys, compromises and forgivings, acceptance and giving. You have love up on some pedestal where it is freezing to death half the time and boiling to death the other half, from the way you describe your recent past.

I sort of get where your coming from... but how can someone not be prepared to forgive me.. and how can she move on and replace me..

i sort of get where your comming from... but how can someone not be prepared to forgive me.. and how can she move on and replace me..
Why should she be with you?

Because regardless of everything I done I was still there... I wanted her and wanted to be a father I just realised too late... for what its worth I didn't do anything with anyone else.. I only spoke to girls on line.. I know its just as bad.. but why won't she forgive it?

So am I to spend the rest of my life regretting what I done? Because I feel so bad.. I can't get over it...

Men have done much worse things to there partners and they forgove them... I feel like I was just there to get her pregnant and now I have to suffer

because regardless of everything i done i was still there... i wanted her and wanted to be a father i just realised too late... for what its worth i didnt do anything with anyone else.. i only spoke to girls on line.. i know its just as bad.. but why wont she forgive it?
I - I - I - I - I...

Why should she forgive? Or maybe she has and is moving on.

OK.. so I guess its just the women are... if its broke we don't need to fix it.. we just replace it with something else.. what about my son being brought up by someone else? Does anyone understand how much this is hurting me?

ok.. so i guess its just the women are... if its broke we dont need to fix it.. we just replace it with somthing else.. what about my son being brought up by someone else? does anyone understand how much this is hurting me?
The women are what?

You can be in your son's life and be his father. Why would you not and make this an even bigger mess?

She is not letting me see him.. unless its on her terms.. she's not even put me on the birth certificate.. can anyone else understand that she is being unresnoble.. and has done all this to just get me angry...

she is not letting me see him.. unless its on her terms.. shes not even put me on the birth certificate.. can anyone else understand that she is being unresnoble.. and has done all this to just get me angry...
You can demand a DNA test, prove you are the father, and get court-ordered visitation. You aren't a victim of her whims.

Act like an adult and she might respect you more.

the best thing ive read in a long time


WG - there is no source. I believe this is plagiarized.

i sort of get where your comming from... but how can someone not be prepared to forgive me.. and how can she move on and replace me..

Apparently she can and has -

This is not helping me...

We can't help you as long as you play martyr and keep deluding yourself.

Find a lawyer and get a DNA test ordered so you can set up a visitation schedule.

she is not letting me see him.. unless its on her terms.. shes not even put me on the birth certificate.. can anyone else understand that she is being unresnoble.. and has done all this to just get me angry...



This is all about you. That's all I'm reading.

You "dated" a woman who makes a living bringing men pleasure and who makes money when they keep coming back for more. I'm sure she's enchanting and even beyond enchanting - or else she'd be successful in some other line of work.

Unless and until you have Court-ordered DNA testing done you have no idea where you stand.

"Why are men more forgiving than women?" They aren't. You (one man) are. Many men would not become involved with a prostitute, knowing the risk of pregnancy, disease, injury to her, occasionally death. You did.

"It reminded me of a lost princess who needed me to show her a new life"

Now THAT is the best thing I read all day! Imagine that, a prostitute and a driver falling in love.

I can't wait until that comes out on Disney!

"It reminded me of a lost princess who needed me to show her a new life"

Now THAT is the best thing I read all day! Imagine that, a prostitute and a driver falling in love.

I can't wait until that comes out on Disney!
It will be the storyline in my next contemporary romance novel.

"It reminded me of a lost princess who needed me to show her a new life"

Now THAT is the best thing I read all day! Imagine that, a prostitute and a driver falling in love.

I can't wait until that comes out on Disney!


I think it has - no, wait, that was Julia Roberts. Never mind.

I can see it on the billboard now - "The Driver and the Hooker."

I have been very nice all day, trying to be compassionate. Well, I lost it when I read, "I look at her and say, "Fancy breakfast?" "Yes!" so we go to Macdonalds to eat."

Spewed coffee all over.

I wonder if she didn't want a fancy breakfast where they would have gone?

I have been very nice all day, trying to be compassionate. Well, I lost it when I read, "I look at her and say, "Fancy breakfast?" "Yes!" so we go to Macdonalds to eat."

Ok, so when I read this... I laughed... really... then laughed, even harder... then... laughed some more.

I mean after all a Mc griddle is the equivalent to a Monte Cristo.

As I was adding caps and such like, I was rather astounded at that magnanimous offer for breakfast, so added quote marks to give a dialogue break in the narrative.

There were just too many "i"s to cap them all. Which says something about this entire adventure...

sorry i just wrote it all out... sorry its a bit of a head ache

No its not a head ache at all, I know how it feels when you are thinking about your love and breakup and tyring to get everything out of your mind, I understand that feeling completely but the fact is she don't want to come back to you, but if you want your son back to you who is your only hope to live your life happily then you can try the legal actions, but it would want lots of pateince to go through the legal system..

Decision is all yours.. my best wishes with you, god bless you..

It will be the storyline in my next contemporary romance novel.



Don't mock my life please, how dare u

no its not a head ache at all, i know how it feels when you are thinking about ur love and breakup and tyring to get everything out of ur mind, i understand that feeling completely but the fact is she dont want to come back to you, but if you want your son back to you who is your only hope to live your life happily then you can try the legal actions, but it would want lots of pateince to go through the legal system..

decision is all yours.. my best wishes with you, god bless you..



Thank you... at least your not mocking my life like some people...

dont mock my life please, how dare u


Here's how "she" (which should be "we") dares - you post that you had a relationship with a prostitute, it reads like a very bad bodice-thumping novel, you don't want to hear advice, you don't want to take advice, you take her for a romantic and upscale breakfast at McDonald's - and you don't want anyone to mention it?

This could have been a simple question - "I might have a child with a hooker. She won't let me see the child. What should I do?" Instead we get something that no one can even read.

Don't get all righteously indignant now.

And when you choose which advice to take and which advice not to take - read some of the other posts.

And if you want it straight - "forgiving" isn't the word I would use to describe you.

So back to the girlfriend - you don't think that she said those same words, made the same moves, behaved the same way with all of her clients? You were special?

Well, maybe they didn't offer to take her to McDonald's for an upscale breakfast. Maybe the Princess never went to an upscale place before, and the experience dazzled her.

I am beginning to think either a very bad romance writer, someone who is 14 or a troll.

This simply cannot be for real. And no one thinks that the girlfriend's boss (i.e. pimp) is/was very, very careful who drove "his girls" around? When she was with the OP she wasn't bringing in any money for her "boss." Think about that for a second.

Sigh, I worked enforcement too long.

Uber member? What advice have you given but try and make a joke of my situation...

Yes so what macdonalds.. who doesn't like a egg muffin??

From my whole story you find crap like that to comment on...

I question your uber member status...

Obv you have spent more time onyour pctanin the real world

I made a relationship of a prostitute and had a child...

I need advice not smart remarks like what you have said.

thank you... at least your not mocking my life like some people...

Ok then. Here is my legitimate response to your fairytale...

YOU, and only YOU brought this on yourself! You KNEW she was a hooker before you fell in love. Love? More like infatuation. It's not like you fell for her, then she said, oh by the way, I am a hooker. No, you knew.

Sorry, but this isn't a fairytale. It's more like a nightmare. You are too controlling and too much of a baby to keep her. She moved on! She has sex. That's what she does. What, did you think your "magic wand" would have changed anything? Nope.

Here, you want advice? Ok, here it is... Move on. Get a REAL job. Perhaps an education, and find a woman with a respectable, legitimate CAREER. Be a good father to your son. Make your parents proud.

There you have it.

uber member? wot advice have u given but try and make a joke of my situation...

yes so wot macdonalds.. who dosnt like a egg muffin???

from my whole story u find crap like that to comment on...

i question your uber member status...

obv u have spent more time onyour pctanin the real world

i made a relationship of a prostitute and had a child...

i need advice not smart remarks like what u have said.



What? Editor! We need you over here.

Well, I don't understand what "pctanin" means so if that's an insult you missed your target.

You got advice - retain an Attorney. What else do you need to know.

Let me see, pctanin - ?

And when someone asks me out to an upscale "place," I'm most definitely not thinking McDonald's, egg McMuffin or no egg McMuffin. I was hoping whole breakfast, not the $1.99 special.

Pctanin?

Uber means a long-time member, someone who has posted a lot. That insult also missed its mark.

Pctanin?

Ok then. Here is my legitimate response to your fairytale....

YOU, and only YOU brought this on your self! You KNEW she was a hooker before you fell inlove. Love? More like infatuation. It's not like she you fell for her, then she said, oh by the way, I am a hooker. No, you knew.

Sorry, but this isn't a fairytale. It's more like a nightmare. You are too controlling and too much of a baby to keep her. She moved on! She has sex. That's what she does. What, did you think your "magic wand" would have changed anything? Nope.

Here, you want advice? Ok, here it is... Move on. Get a REAL job. Perhaps an education, and find a woman with a respectable, legitimate CAREER. Be a good father to your son. Make your parents proud.

There you have it.


- And I will add this prostitute who is not working the street is somewhere between hooker and call girl. She must deal with some high flyers. You are not in that category. I suspect she got tired of your puppy-dog affection and mooning over her and bad "stories" and simply moved on.

There are probably also 4 other guys in line who believe they are the father.

At any rate - you don't want to get an Attorney, you are apparently afraid to find out if you are or are not the father and would prefer to sit in the corner and feel sorry for yourself.

Time to close this thread?

Sorry that was meant tosay too much time on your PC than in the real world...

Yeah it is ed up that's I fell for prostitute.. and yes I agree that I was not strong enuff for her...

But I'm in a state... can't see how I can get threw this...

I do have a decent job now, I left all the I used to do to be a good father... I'm well educated and have a degree, so don't make assumptions

Having a go at me and taking the piss that's just not right.

Well, let us not forget that her standards are low.

A driver taking her to McyDs and then to a Super 8 hotel for... more sex, MAY be considered "upscale".

What is your degree in?

sorry that was meant tosay too much time on your pc than in the real world...

yeh it is ed up thats i fell for prostitute.. and yes i agree that i was not strong enuff for her...

but im in a state... can't see how i can get threw this...

i do have a decent job now, i left all the i used to do to be a good father... im well educated and have a degree, so dont make assumptions

having a go at me and taking the piss thats just not right.


Okay, you want to continue the discussion - well educated in what?

"Piss"? Is that one of your well educated words?

Again - all of this is MEANINGLESS. Maybe now that you're well educated, with a degree and a good job, articulate, maybe she feels you are above her standing in life and she's embarrassed.

Until/unless you get DNA done none of this matters.

(What does "taking the piss" at you mean?)

What is your degree in?


Creative writing OR fast food management.

He is my son! I believe that I feel it also... I know he is mine.. that's not even in debate.

I'm sorry this has now turned into an argument, its not what I need...

And for some of you that haven't lived in a situation like this it is hard to get used to the idea of my life.

I live it though... u people just read a story its very different.

I'm going to pursue legal action

And remove all contact between me and her.

Thank you for all your advice

It was harsh and true. And has made me realise human nature a bit more.

My degree is in psychology.

Perhaps take what you have learned in your psych classes, and utilize it when to read people better.

That way you won't get your heart broken again.

Great thanks

Oh and one last piece of advice. Even though you feel "confident" that the child is yours, I would STILL have a DNA test to prove it. After all, her profession consists of jumping into bed with other men. So you really never know. I believe you din't want to know who the reall father is, so that you can stay connected to her forever.

Any psychologist would know that...

Thanks.

Oh and one last peice of advice. Even though you feel "confident" that the child is yours, I would STILL have a DNA test to prove it. After all, her profession consists of jumping into bed with other men. So you really never know. I believe you din't want to know who the reall father is, so that you can stay connected to her forever.

Any psychologist would know that...


I am restraining myself - maybe she was his class project. If I had a nickel for every person who was "sure" the child was his I'd have a pile of nickels.

If I had a nickel for every psychologist who found himself in this predicament, who had to go on line for help with this question, I'd have no nickels.

At any rate, Enigma - do you have any plans for breakfast? Pick you up about 10? (The menu changes at 11AM and I'm NOT paying lunch prices for breakfast items.)

im well educated and have a degree, so dont make assumptions
Well educated? In what way? Please tell us more about that degree.

It took me nearly a half hour to fix your original post (without changing any of your wording/phrasing) to make it readable. No college grad should write that badly.

how dare u

u nasty pieceof work..go urself


Hard to believe the mother doesn't want this well educated, big spending, lucid (?), well employed person in her child's life.

The very, very sad part is - the mother is an acknowledged prostitute. Maybe she is an independent. I doubt it, because the OP was hired as a "driver" by someone else. She has a pimp. Yes, that changes it from "escort" to "prostitute."

The father is a self-professed Psychology major, barely able to express himself, cannot figure himself out (let alone anyone else), foul mouthed.

The sad truth is that if the child is to have any chance the father has to be any one of her paid partners, not the OP. Maybe one of the paid partners is educated and has some class.

Sad - the child has no chance at all.

And I'm not joking. I'm deadly serious.

nasty americans

What is your location?

I'm going to jump in here. First, too much has been made of the "Fancy Breakfast" quote. I read it differently. I read it as a question; "Do you want to go for breakfast? Not "do you want a fancy breakfast?" I think the OP deserves an apology for that misinterpretation.

That being said, what seems clear is that the OP had a chance for a relationship with this woman and blew it. The OP's personal prejudices and biases resulted in this and he has no one to blame but himself. The girl has moved on and he needs to accept that.

So we come down to the child. As noted the OP needs to go to court to establish paternity and visitation if he wants to be part of the child's life.

There is really nothing more that can be said here.

>I look at her and say, "Fancy breakfast?" "Yes!" so we go to Macdonalds to eat."<

>I look at her and say, "Fancy breakfast?" "Yes!" so we go to Macdonalds to eat."<

I believe the OP may be from the UK. Using the phrase "Fancy _____?" is a question of "desire_____?" http://grammar.yourdictionary.com/slang/common-uk-expressions-slang.html

Ah, "fancy breakfast?" = "do you want to go out for breakfast?"

(((((ScottGem)))))