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View Full Version : Becoming a little discourged, great woman with a child.


Hedgehogdilemma
Aug 13, 2012, 06:40 PM
Ten months ago I ran into an a girl I had a thing for in high school. After getting to know her again I discovered she had also had a "crush" on me back in the old glory days. We hung out a lot over the next couple months and became very close. I really liked how mature and driven she is. Being that this is the first girl I have dated my age since my early twenty's, I guess that is a give in. I am thirty but I look about twenty three, which has lead to a long line of younger girls in my life. But, back to the topic, she has a ten year old son. At first this didn't bother me at all. I felt I was mature enough, and I like children so I thought I would give it try. I have really fallen for her over this time, and generally he's a good kid that I like and respect. But, I have noticed she has all but cut out our time together. In the past couple of months it's been the three of us anywhere we go. If they sleep over, I feel uncomfortable having any "adult" time with her for his sake, and I have felt that our great conversations and time have turned into us on the couch watching children's films or video games. Not to mention, when I see them it's a week or two weeks apart. I could handle this if there was a balance. I have brought it up to her very gently that I need time with just her occasionally. But she says the only person she knows well enough to baby sit her son is her mother, and her mother disapproves of her having any type of life besides work or taking care of her son. Her mother says "when he's eighteen, you can start your life again, you made your bed now sleep in it." All this has made me wonder how she had time for me in the beginning. But, once again back to the topic. I really have strong feelings for her and want this to work, but I often feel that if she can't take some time with me even once a month would be nice, that I will always be on the back burner with her. Now today I brought this up on the phone, and her answer was we should move in together. I was speechless, and it sent my head spinning to all the things that could happen. Good and bad. And I have no idea where to go from this. I have even thought breaking it off, and this is the first time I have ever thought of that. I just really need some advice on where to go from here. My instincts say run! My heart says stay. My brain says you need a drink...