PDA

View Full Version : Hyperactive sex individual or what?


fuego750
Aug 3, 2012, 04:16 PM
My boyfriend don't talk to me for days if I don't have sex when he wants. Sometimes he agrees not doing it before going to sleep but I can't say no in the morning or his attitude change. It makes me feel like I'm just a sex toy, he's only happy if we do it! And of course he wasn't like that when we start dating.
He's divorced and he complains that his ex never wants to do it with him, but I think I know why! He can handle one night but not 2 without sex. Is very annoying! And the way he try to manipulate (not talking to me) works even less because every time he do that I just want to do it even less. It makes me upset and doesn't really improve anything. On the other hand he's a gentlemen, excellent father, and I have no other complain other than that. But honestly sometimes I just want to run away! We talk about it before and he seems to understand but as soon as I don't want to do it again, the cycle starts.
Any advise?

Enigma1999
Aug 3, 2012, 07:03 PM
Just out of curiosity, why did they divorce? Was it because he pressured her as well?

fuego750
Aug 3, 2012, 09:03 PM
Just out of curiosity, why did they divorce? Was it because he pressured her as well?

Well, They were together for 8 yrs and since the kids born she don't want to do it like before. They separate for couple of things not only one but that was a big factor. He had a lot of rancor against her. And I don't want that this to happen again but this time with me.

Enigma1999
Aug 3, 2012, 09:08 PM
Well, They were together for 8 yrs and since the kids born she don't want to do it like before. They separate for couple of things not only one but that was a big factor. He had a lot of rancor against loher. And I don't want that this to happen again but this time with me.

You need to ask yourself if this is all worth it. Perhaps he needs counseling. I don't see you being a problem, nor do I believe his ex was the problem. HE is the problem, and maybe it's time he gets the help he needs before he commits to you. This seems bigger to me, than just two days of missing out in sex. It's more like an addiction.

BethVader
Aug 3, 2012, 10:07 PM
It clearly sounds like your sexual needs and desires are very different
And you are not happy at all with his manipulations. (why would you be?)
If I were you, I would leave him. You are NOT the problem here, he is.
And his sexual desires are not the problem, the problem is what he is doing
To your self-esteem with his manipulations and hurtful actions.
Please do not marry this man, it will only get worse.

f010244
Aug 4, 2012, 01:28 AM
Yes, I have an advise for you... dump him.

He does not respect you at all, some childish behavior of not talking to you if you don't have sex with him. Tell the jerk to get a plastic doll and do it however many times a day he feels like it.

Please leave him, you deserve a good guy.

fuego750
Aug 5, 2012, 05:04 PM
Yes, I have an advise for you...................dump him.

He does not respect you at all, some childish behavior of not talking to you if you don't have sex with him. Tell the jerk to get a plastic doll and do it however many times a day he feels like it.

Please leave him, you deserve a good guy.

That's a wonderful idea, thanks!

JudyKayTee
Aug 6, 2012, 06:31 AM
Have you tried sitting him down, talking to him, telling him how you feel?

Any time you have to trade sex for anything (for example, you are trading sex so he doesn't get angry or distant) it is a mistake and a very uneven relationship.

This is one step up from blackmail.

Would I leave him? Not without talking to him first.

JudyKayTee
Aug 12, 2012, 01:32 PM
My boyfriend don't talk to me for days if I don't have sex when he wants. ... On the other hand he's a gentlemen, excellent father, and I have no other complain other than that. But honestly sometimes I just want to run away! We talk about it before and he seems to understand but as soon as I don't want to do it again, the cycle starts.
Any advise?


But you do have other complaints about him - https://www.askmehelpdesk.com/mental-emotional-health/symptom-ocd-693110.html

Minimally he's juvenile and controlling.