My ex girlfriend and I had a tumultuous relationship. It was only four months but it was nothing but intense passion. We were both very young though. I had serious issues however. I became clingy and more than that I was suffering from extreme depression and the wrong prescription meds. After a fight with her I tried to kill myself by ODing. She was wise enough to realize I needed help and needed to not be leaning on her. She tried to break up with me but I guilted her into giving me another chance. The next day I ran out of gas when she was in the car essentially stranding us. She broke up with me trying to explain she wasn't mad that she just wanted me to get better and perhaps in the future we could try again when I was ready for a relationship. I didn't listen and persisted and ended up causing a lot of needless drama. I finally got the message and decided to give her space.

She said she didn't know what the future held but that I needed to work on myself. I've been in therapy and NA and after she thanked me for the birthday card I sent her I wrote her a letter telling her thank you for saving my life and that I'm doing better. I gave her my new number if ever she wanted to contact me. One of the reasons for the letter is I saw on her social networking pages she would lament about our breakup having a hard time with it herself. Anyway she's off on a new journey in her life to four years of college up north and I'm a little older but am trying to start a career and finish my education as well.

But there still stands that thing we both said of maybe in the future a few years from now possibly. I'm working hard on myself becoming healthier sober fitter I'm getting a new wardrobe and am becoming a follower of Christ something she always wanted me to be. Is it crazy to hold out hope for us in the future? And do I just go NC for four years?

You do nothing until you have a year of clean sober living. Get your own act together. Then see what else life has to offer.

Just be better, you attract the same people as your are, if you are depressed you attract depressed people. Your girlfriend wasn't able to handle that. I suggest best be prepared who knows what will come along

I would 100% focus on you and getting healthy. Put all your energy into yourself and once you've stabilized perhaps consider a relationship.